Second Stops to Life

2010-07-11T09:41:00.000-07:00

I have a few things to pray about so i'll just list them here for fun

-I pray that some problems that my friends are going through would solve themselves. Some decisions that they have made has caused them a great deal of stress and problems and i though i have not voiced out my objections to it, i hope that they will eventually learn to leave things that are not meant to be

-I pray for patience. Many times my temper tends to flare up, and though it is good that i dont act out my feelings,my words tend to be hurtful to my friends. I pray that i learn to not only control my tongue, but also learn to take things on a lighter note and relax before reacting.

-I pray that somehow my internship postings would be something that i can enjoy doing, and that i'll learn many things and gain valuable experience from it, no matter where i am posted to.

-I pray for my NAPFA test, that i'll finally make a choice as to whether i should just take that extra 2 months as a good way to get fit, so that my soccer skills will improve as i'll have more stamina.

-I pray for my future. Though i cant seem to imagine how its gona be like, i pray that everything will work out according to God's plan and will work out alright.

2009-12-02T10:10:00.000-08:00

Fringe is awesome. SERIOUSLY

Its more adrenaline-inducing and thrilling than criminal minds. just that errr. its science fiction and alot of its cases doesnt sound quite real. hahaha! i mean fine theres some science involved but still it sounds unbelievable. hahaha! like. if such things happen then we totally will live in fear XD

oh wells. its awesome anyway. watch! :D

I've been bored lately. need to find some RPG to kill time with. hahaha.. any recommendations anyone? lately its been boring. classmates and quite a few friends are overseas and im here in singapore stressing about not doing assignments (of which i cant seem to start) and doing practically nothing with my 1 week break XD oh wells.

hopefully i can start on a few things i have in mind. one of which is homework, another of which involves a hobby. WOOHOO! HAHAHA!

And i've linked people whom i shld have linked long ago. HAHHAHA yay me. 1 step towards hardworkingness XD

I've been feeling down lately. maybe its just cos im bored. or maybe cos theres no one to talk to :(

2009-11-24T08:35:00.000-08:00

My birthday was... AWESOME.

Lets start from the first surprise. 18th Nov, we apparently were just having an outing to vivo to relax and all. with ronny, darren, cass and jasmine initially. hahaha! organised by jasmine siol...
HAHA! oh wells. wanted to go and eat ice cream. XD then i made a bet with darren that if we go eat fast food he owes me a macs ice cream and if we eat proper meal i owe him macs ice cream. HAHA! so the whole time we were trying to convince the group to eat in a place such that we'll win the bet. XD

oh wells. anyway. we ended up eating at.....

CARLS JUNIOR!

okay la. fast food. was quite full after that. HAHA! then had to play the number game to eat the fries and the jalapeno peppers. mixed the sauces and all. hahaha.. some were actually not bad. XD

Juowi and rach joined us after their movie (paranormal activity) OH YEA before meeting everyone at vivo, i went to repair my phone (SONY ERICSSON. OH THE PAIN OF THEIR CURRENT PHONES' QUALITIES. T_T ), then went to meet lyana, pee, grace, weiling (like, 30 mins late for the movie XD)to watch PARANORMAL ACTIVITY. It was okay lahhh.. i mean. you gotta think that the movie is real to find it scary. but if you were like me (and rely on other people to talk about movies to want to watch it) then you'd have heard that the movie has a budget of 20k (super low, DUH) and the whole thing was filmed at the director's house. hahaha! so what happened for me throughout the movie was that i knew there wont be any scary ghosts and i was most of the time wondering how they did their effects. LOL okay not fun :( but apparently everyone else in the cinema was screaming and OH NOing their lungs out. oh wells XD

Anyway after that we went to the roof at vivo to relax.. then found a dry spot (it was raining before that). after that went to the toilet with ronny and darren while jasmine and cass went shopping. after that they tried to make me take photo and put my head through the railing. LOL but yea

TADA! cass and jasmine appeared with a tub of ice cream and relighting candles and food republic spoons for everyone. HAHAHA! cass passed me 2 cards, 1 was LAST YEAR's overdue christmas card (AHHAHAHAHA but at least she wrote one for me :D) and another was my birthday card! :) hahaha! which didnt have jasmine's name on it cos she wrote and made one by herself. :D haha!

okay... surprise! it was to celebrate my birthday. hhahaa! oh wells XD their "shopping" was to buy the ice cream and borrow the spoons. HAHA! okay la. heard their funny stories after that. hahaha... and made a mess of the place XD the night was awesome. :)

Then came my real birthday. lets see...
Heres some statistics
110 facebook birthday wishes,
30 plus birthday smses,
out of the 30, like only 5 i knew who it was from.

Btw. i sent my phone for repair on the 17th so i was using a temp phone. and i lost all my contacts. 500 plus. FML

anyway so yea i didnt know who sent those smses and had to reply smth like "THANKS! :) err.. sorry but who are you? i lost all my phone contacts :(" . oops. oh wells. hahaha! felt so bad.

so. in the morning, i went for sharity gift box at bukit panjang area with wt and jessie (the rest i didnt know until that day. XD) . hahaha.. quite fun la. they surprised me by getting the organizers to announce that it was my birthday during the briefing. hahaha! and and and wt gave me a birthday card!!! <3 OH and the GLs gave me a BIG board to hold (it was like A2 size la.) throughout the day, and FORBADE me to see it. XD it was kept safely inside a plastic bag. hahaha! tempting to see, but luckily i didnt. XD but i did crumple some post-its on the board. (kinda guessed it was my birthday card BUT didnt know what the post-its were for. haha! HAD TO CARRY IT THROUGHOUT SGB! LOL!

went door to door and gave out flyers which asked for donations of daily essential items and rang everyone's doorbell to inform them about it. tiring, but fun. then went to juowi's house to slack, then chiong with some GLs to SUKI SUSHI for sushi bugget!! XD

Their sashimi is AWESOME. seriously. we ordered 10 plates in all XD hahhaa... me and juowi share, and mad stole a few :D:D:D

hahaha! oh wells. then weiling came to join us (LATE AGAIN! THAT UNCLE. HAHAHAHA! ). after that i had to chiong to work. then joined them at e2max where they were slacking. hahhha.. FINALLY COULD SEE my card and saw all the forfeits which were written on the post its i had to do XD like super hard la!!! i think i only like. did 1. or 2. out of like 30. hahaha! die. XD
AND the card was in chinese. HAHAHAHAHAHA! at least everyone signed off in chinese. so i had to guess who wrote what. hahaha! and ronny's birthday wish was totally in chinese XD

Anyway so it was only juowi and rach, and ronny and mad, and i =D. weiling went off after the buffet. we decided to rent a movie at e2max. rented my best friend's girl. quite funny lahh.. and its M18! WOOHOOO! hahaha! even though mad isnt 18 yet. HAHA!

But it was quite nice. the main actors were the american pie guy (jim, in american pie, and that actor can act as a loser super well. HAHA!) and the guy from good luck chuck. super funny. anyway. towards the end of the movie..

TADA! ENTER: JIAWEN! :) she NICELY came all the way from the airport to join us for the last part of the movie. hahaha! awwww.. anyway after the movie we went to macs to eat ice cream, then went to the bus stop (then after that everyone went MRT station. LOL). oh wells. then all headed home :)

AWESOME DAY! :D but i felt kinda bad to make jiawen come all the way from the airport to join us for such a short while :( oh wells..

Next is 22nd Nov! :)

Went to church. hahaha.. was quite stoned. oh wells. tired cos i barely slept :(
Okay confession time. i fell asleep during the sermon. too tired le. shoots man. the sermon was really relevant to me la. sigh. i think it would have been REALLY USEFUL if i just listened and stayed awake. but during the announcements already i dozed off, way before the sermon started :( oh wells. sigh. Problem to fix #1.

Cell group was interesting. it was... CHEEM ttm. seriously. hahaha! had to wreck my brain cells to get the passage, but i think ali did a great job teaching still :) hahaha! oh wells.

after cell, went to Heng guang's house to slack, along with Heng guang, Edmund, Leroy, Alex, and Deric (who came later). i went to sleep on HG's bed cos i was tired and didnt want to play PES. hahaa! but came out when they played halo 2. ahhhh.. the good times. HAHA!

so yea. had to run off halfway to go work XD oh wells. hahaha! then after that we met at west coast plaza to walk to sakura together. and i got a call from my parents saying that theyre joining us. okay la. SURPRISE. but quite weird. hahaha.. its like scary to have parents around your friends. XD oh wells. but still sakura buffet was quite good. hahaha! okay la, not really that high quality, but at least theres a variety of food. and we chionged the clip stuff. HAHAHA! WE HAD TO RESTRAIN ALDEN :D he went clip happy and we all were too full to eat ( i was resting. HAHA! like to digest. XD) WE ATE ALOT. LIKE SERIOUSLY. HAHAHA! most of us had to walk with hunched backs while taking more food XD

Lets see.. after the break we all chionged dessert. then in the end only like left alden and i eating. hahaha! ICE CREAM FTW! :D

Hunched our way out of sakura and home. lucky got my parents around to drive me home if not i think i'll vomit and die from the walking. hahaha! went home to play dota! :D tradition. hahaha! but had a bad game cos of an imbalanced team. XD

AWESOME DAY! :) hahhhhahaha! had tons of fun choinging food marathon. HAHA! :D

Buffet 2 days in a row = 9999999 days of exercise for me. :D

Today: was supposed to play netball for polympics. in the end there were too many people in the group (we could totally form 3 teams in total) and didnt get a chance to play. but still we goofed around with the spare netballs and kinda played soccer and target practice. HAHA!

2009-11-13T10:23:00.000-08:00

Old song, i know... but..

Crush - David Archuleta

I hung up the phone tonight,
Something happened for the first time,
Deep inside it was a rush, what a rush,
Cause the possibility that
You would ever feel the same away about me,
It’s just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth,
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized,
And I just got to know

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone,
All that we can be, where this thing can go,
Am I crazy or falling in love,
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath, when I look at you,
Are you holding back, like the way I do,
Cause I’m tryin’, tryin’ to walk away
But I know this crush aint’ goin’ away, goin’ away

Has it ever cross your mind when we’re hangin’,
Spending time girl,
Are we just friends, is there more, is there more,
See it’s a chance we’ve gotta take,
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last,
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone,
all that we can be, where this thing can go,
Am I crazy or falling in love,
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath, when I look at you,
Are you holding back, like the way I do,
Cause I’m tryin’, tryin’ to walk away
But I know this crush aint’ goin’ away, goin’ away

Why do I keep running from the truth,
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized,
And I just got to know

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone,
all that we can be, where this thing can go,
Am I crazy or falling in love,
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath, when I look at you,
Are you holding back, like the way I do,
Cause I’m tryin’, tryin’ to walk away
But I know this crush aint’ goin’ away, goin’ away

2009-11-01T09:35:00.000-08:00

I've been having a short temper lately.

I dont know if its just my irritability increasing as life seems to suck more or simply that i just lack sleep or am too stressed. or maybe both.

Either way, after the nap i had today, when i finally could think clearly, i woke up (in more ways than one) with many regrets. hopefully life gets better and i can learn to show benevolence and love. and patience. and maybe more cheeriness.

oh wells. back to the lack of sleep me again. :(

2009-10-17T00:32:00.000-07:00

Staring At the Sun
By Offspring

Maybe, life is like a ride on the freeway
Dodging bullets while you're trying to find your way
Everyone's around, but no one does a damn thing
It brings me down, but I won't let them

If I seem bleak
Well, you'd be correct
And if I don't speak
It's 'cause I get disconnected
But I won't be burned by the reflection
Of the fire in your eyes
As you're staring at the sun

(Hey!)
When I ran I didn't feel like a runaway. (Hey!)
When I escaped I didn't feel like I got away. (Hey!)
There's more to living than only surviving
Maybe I'm not there, but I'm still trying

Though you hear me
I don't think that you relate
My will is something
That you can't confiscate
So forgive me, but I won't be frustrated
By destruction in your eyes
As you're starin' at the sun

(Hey!)
When I ran I didn't feel like a runaway. (Hey!)
When I escaped I didn't feel like I got away. (Hey!)
There's more to living than only surviving
Maybe I'm not there, but I'm still trying

Though you hear me
I don't think that you relate
My will is something
That you can't confiscate
So forgive me, but I won't be frustrated
By destruction in your eyes
As you're starin' at the sun

Maybe, life is like a ride on the freeway. (Hey!)
Dodging bullets while you're trying to find your way. (Hey!)
Everyone's around, but no one does a damn thing
It brings me down, but I won't let them

If I seem bleak
Well you'd be correct
And if I don't speak
It's cause I get disconnected
But I won't be burned by the reflection
Of the fire in your eyes
As you're staring at the sun

2009-09-28T10:43:00.000-07:00

Sunday was interesting. Cell had an interesting topic. Haha!

It was about marriage.

So everyone was like sharing. HAHAHA! and i find it quite funny that everyone has different views about it. But quite a few (and im one of them!) said that theyre waiting for that perfect person to come, and that when that person comes they'll know cos God will lead and guide. =D

YEA! hahaha! its so nice to know that. really! :) of course, theres as usual the joke that that perfect person will fall from heaven. and it will be like. SPLAT! HAHA! and either jane or jasmine (cant rmb who) said that thats so mr bean. HAHA! there was so many jokes about whether we should marry and who wants kids and all. hahaha! and my money is totally on mund or nick on marrying first still. HAHA!

Oh oh oh! there was this discussion whether we should marry or not. hahaha! then there was this super long debate on deciding who to marry. hahaha! super funny. then we were all giving each other all that crap on not marrying and staying single cos SINGLE LIFE ROCKS. HAHAHA! okay fine just me. haha! and the usual jokes of why settle for one fish when you can have the whole sea. (the original is ocean, but OCEAN is the name of the cell group. HAHA!)

Oh and a super funny part was when one of the people spoke on marital commitment of both parties, how they must take care of each other. HAHAHA! you know. their desires and all. HAHAHAHA! SUPER FUNNY. HAHAHAHA! then all the guys were giving this blank look with a "hmmmmmm.." face that wanted to rebut the statement but somehow no one could cos actually it was quite true. HAHA! and there was this wierd awkward silence for a while while everyone tried to argue XD (okay. some people were talking, definitely, seeing how the cell is like filled with the noisiest people in the world :D:D:D but it was slightly quieter).

Hahaha! Well, i guess everyones still waiting for their mr or ms perfect to drop by :D btw. i just noticed that everyone in the cell group is single now. hahaha! since a few just broke up. >.< well. those almost together but not together yet i'm still counting them as single. HAHA! as well as those unofficially together that kind (i dont think there is though. HAHA!) But still, hmm.... i think correct la. all single. HAHAHA!

and.

I WANNA PLAY SOCCER! omgosh. i want to sprint. i want to run. i want to sprint as fast as i can. ARGHH!!! i tried running for a bus today and i was so disappointed at the speed i ran. it was like WALKING la. ARGHH!!! dammitt laa..... i need to run more. soon. WHEN WILL MY LEG RECOVER?!??!?!! ARGHHHH!!! getting impatient :( sigh. i keep dreaming of playing street soccer. i want that feeling of controlling the ball.. shooting and scoring... dogging others down.. :(

maybe i can get a chance to play tmr... :( oh wells. hahahahaa... maybe i'll go the next street soccer and not run. just be a camping striker. hahaha! or a goalie. XD okay. okay. i shall... omgosh... BUT THERES NO SOCCER :( sighhh..... i dare not play tennis cos it places even more strain on my knees and tennis is must sprint. :(

2009-09-04T13:02:00.000-07:00

You rescued me
And saved my soul
Renewed my life
And made me whole

My chains You broke
And set me free
Saved me from sin
For all eternity

Freely You came
Hung on the cross
You bought my life
At the highest cost

You paid for all
That I might live
To You I owe
My life, I give

2009-08-16T11:49:00.000-07:00

Song: The power of Your Name.
By: Lincoln Brewster
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCEXSV-y-so

Surely children weren't made for the streets
And fathers were not made to leave
Surely this isn't how it should be
Let Your Kingdom come
Surely nations were not made for war
Or the broken meant to be ignored
Surely this just can't be what You saw
Let Your Kingdom come
Here in my heart

I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I'd been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your Name

Surely life wasn't made to regret
And the lost were not made to forget
Surely faith without actions is dead
Let Your Kingdom come
Lord break this heart

I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I'd been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your Name

Your Name
Is a shelter for the hurting
Jesus Your Name
Is a refuge for the weak
Only Your Name
Can redeem the undeserving
Jesus Your Name
Holds everything I need

I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I'd been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your Name

Its such a beautiful song...
With so much power...

2009-08-10T09:05:00.000-07:00

The Click Five - Empty

Tried to take a picture
Of love
Didn't think I'd miss her
That much
I wanna fill this new frame
But it's empty

Tried to write a letter
In ink
It's been getting better
I think
I got a piece of paper
But it's empty
It's empty

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

And I even wonder
If we
Should be getting under
These sheets
We could lie in this bed
But it's empty
It's empty

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

Oh oh
Oh oh
Oooooh
Oh oh
Oh oh

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

(Maybe we're trying)
(Trying too hard)
(Maybe we're torn apart)
We're empty
(Maybe the timing)
(Is beating our hearts)
We're empty

Super nice emo song... i wanna play this on guitar. XD but sadly, my guitar string snapped. sigh... oh wells.. :(

2009-08-05T09:54:00.000-07:00

Freedom from studies is NEARING! :D

I've decided to set a few goals that i will pray for in ocean...

1. For the cell group to become very united, enthusiastic and committed
2. For everyone to be involved, not leaving anyone out
3. Grow in number
4. Grow in faith
5. Grow spiritually
6. Become a group that supports each other and really stays close together for the rest of our lives

Sounds quite hard.. but oh wells.. i'll keep praying for it... at least now i probably can do something about it..

Its not gonna be easy though... i dont really think that ocean is priority 1 for quite a few people... and i think many find cell group a drag...

I pray church camp bonds us. as well as the ocean retreat... as well as every week that we spend together
I pray that somehow as we prepare and start becoming mentors to the new batch of youths, we'll learn the skills and knowledge to lead quickly.

Thank God for the supportive friends in ocean that has always been keeping the mood high and being enthusiastic for everything! :D
And all the craziness and hilarious things that we always do together.

Something Debs said during the one camp got me thinking... she said something like "what is the use if the few of you become very bonded but everyone else dont?"
I think those oceaners who went for one camp really came out super bonded and warm towards each other... but we gotta extended this bond to the entire ocean.. i do not want ocean to be just a few close friends, but a whole large group of close friends.. its asking alot, but we should not choose our friends within the cell group... we should not just stick close to a few people and not care about the rest. a cell group is a family. and families are supposed to love each and every member no matter who they are.

How can we be a testimony of love when the love is not even shown or displayed?

2009-07-28T08:31:00.000-07:00

I cant say i want it, neither can i say i dont want it.

If i was appointed, fair enough.

But somehow i dont feel confident, and i dont feel like i should be the one. Why cant someone more capable take over? I'm not a capable one at all. There are so many others more intellectual and better at leadership and like everything else than me. so why me?

What if because of me no one remains?

What if because of my poor leadership everyone leaves?

I dont really like the stress of things being my fault. and somehow whatever i do always turns out bad. And now i gotta lead so many others? I cant even take care of myself properly, and i cant even be accountable for myself. Theres others besides me, also sharing the same responsibility, but i'd rather them just take over and lead... its not like theres a lack of leaders. There are so many, and i find it quite random for me to get chosen when there are so many better candidates.

sigh.. and more pressure is on me.. i honestly feel that the others would be appointed so as to let them feel more attachment to it. With responsibilities, they might just feel more importance in their already extremely important part of the group.

But nevertheless, i wont step down unless told to and i wont give up. i'm giving it a try. i hope that i dont be the kind of people that i so dislike.. those that really let conceit get to their heads. I hope that someone better comes along. i hope that nothing bad happens and everyone is happy and that the group grows, and that i wont be causing trouble or making things bad or anything.

2009-07-08T08:56:00.000-07:00

Your faith walks on broken glass,
And the hangover doesn't pass.
Nothing's ever built to last;
You're in ruins.

Green day- 21 Guns

"If its not good, then don't say anything."

Its time i applied this into my life. Seems like my old habit is back again and its kicking in worse than ever. somehow time and time again power and influence and all that crap kinda creeps into my head and i lose my ideals. i've done alot of harm to people i barely know, more harm to those i do know, and i feel like im the cause for a lot of things. screw this.

Don't tell me its a part of life. Its not. Its not becoming of anything I want to become and its hurting my friends and the people whom i'm supposed to love. Maybe i should really just take people's advice and freaking grow up.

2009-07-05T11:37:00.000-07:00

Its time to hardcore chiong playing tennis again :D

I wanna learn the topspin slice serve!!! :D:D:D

hahaha.. okay im contented with just learning the topspin serve XD

Was so inspired to play after seeing roddick's serve in the wimbledon finals against federer..

FEDERER WON! :D oh and i wanna learn how to aim my serves just like fed. hahaha! 40+ Service aces! WOO! HAHAHA! like totally awesome. XD

2009-07-03T10:55:00.000-07:00

i finally watched transformers!!!! :D:D:D:D

After days and days and days of searching for people to watch it with me. HAHHAHA!

Thanks to some people who watched it with other people... like *cough* mund *cough* and *cough* alden *cough*.... and didnt want to watch it again.. that i had no one to watch it with. and some others already had plans to watch it with other people and all.. and some others didnt want to watch it at all (yes, theres people who didnt want to watch an... wait for it... AWESOME show. they either too busy studying, or theyre girls and arent interested at all.)

I never had such difficulty finding people to watch a movie. hahaha! XD maybe because i also didnt want to wait any longer without watching it. hahahah!

okayokay.. i took a break off homework today. hahaha! gonna start stats indiv report like... sunday? hahaha.. or whenever im free. XD hahaha oh wells :D

Today was workic exam.. actually was supposed to have stats at 9am but i couldnt wake up despite my parents literally shouting and pulling me out of bed. HAHA! so i slept and went to school at 2pm for my workic test. ( yes. this is how sad my life is. 9am is stats for 2 hours until 11am, then its a 3 hour break all the way until 2pm for WORKIC. and guess what? same thing happens, but just with different modules, for MONDAYS and TUESDAYS. thats 9 hours a week wasted waiting in school. T_T )

I heard stats was just about sharing and discussions and stuff. so i dont think i missed much .hahaha! heng arh XD

Anyway. day started emo. i was tired... and i didnt study at all for that dumb test which just perfectly had to come right on the same day as an essay deadline. so i spent all my study time doing the essay. T_T thats why when i finished it i was in totally no mood to study, and i didnt study at all. so there. HAHA! so i handed up the essay and went to the exam venue and sat down and screwed around until i got the paper. same things happened... some guys came in late as usual (its still quite entertaining to see him stroll in so relaxed, and i was like quite sure he would be first to leave too.. but i was wrong XD ) and well.

heres the funny part.

I didnt study for the test at all. serious. the only time i "studied" was while walking into the exam hall, reading some tutorial notes from my laptop while walking to my seat. HAHAA! that was how last minute i was. XD HAHAHA! oh wells. anyway the paper was like. TOTALLY NO RELATION TO THE NOTES AND SLIDES AND BOOKS LA. HAHAHA! (okay. how would i know it has no relation to what we've learnt since i didnt study or listen at all? well. read on. )

only the first 10 MCQs had relation to the textbook. hahaha. and some of them is common sense already, and a few of them was covered by chance in one of the projects so i knew the answer XD tyco me. ahhhaah! okay anyway. the last section was testing how well you can crap la. seriously. HAHA! they gave case scenarios and asks you what you would do and yr feelings to such an incident. hahah! i just wrote crap and handed it up. hahahah. oh wells. so, i think i can pass the entire test though i didnt study. wooo!!! :D:D:D

Actually now that i think about it, i think i might fail. hahaha! XD

Oh wells.

im currently addicted to "how i met your mother". hhahah! SUPER NICE LA. and super funny XD barney rocks. ahahaha! XD

2009-06-20T10:29:00.001-07:00

sooo... holidays are here.. yay..

Thursday... well.. i wanted to blog but i found that i had no time. hahaha! i woke up at like 2pm ( 14 hours of sleep, baby! :D ) cos i was super exhausted from lack of sleep in camp. XD well. went to tennis and played and went nuts.. missed tennis loads :(

Friday was around the same.. slept 14 hours again and woke up and went to watch ghost of girlfriends past.. it was quite funny and romantic. hahaha! and some parts were just wierd. XD but oh well. :D quite a good show to watch. hahhaa..

Saturday.. today.. hmm... i woke up at 2pm again, then went to JJ's house for HG's birthday bbq. hahaha.. i was starting the fire with a few others and we all started cooking. (mind you, naiimah, this time i started it, and we took only 10 mins to start 6 fires in 2 seperate pits. and the pit was wet and we had to dry it first and all... and the charcoal was damp... so no need to laugh at us taking a long time hor. cos we didnt. we did it fast ;D )

cooked alot... but ate very little :( well we went swimming halfway while eating and screwed around in the pool. hahaha! oh well. we were like. " eh i very dirty leh. time to go swimming. " HAHAHA! super funny. anyway. the birthday cake was like. literally carrot cake. hahaha! the cake had carrots inside. XD and HG's mum baked it. it was quite nice. hahhaa.. its like healthy and nice at the same time and those 2 words dont usually come together. hahaha!

So yea. mund came and stayed the night at my house.. we'll be going church together tmr. :D

OH!!! one camp reloaded... monday to wednesday.. was GREAT! :D hahhaa! okay la. i shant compare the first and second camps.. but to me i preferred the second camp ( one camp reloaded ) cos the games were more insane and unique. hahaha! and original and fun. :D the first one camp was like a remake of tackle camp so i was quite bored. hahhahaha. XD
oh well. i was like the youth leader for my group and my group leader was 1 year younger than me. hahaha! i was like the oldest la. hahahahah! super funny. XD sumore my group leader looked older than me. well... she looked more mature than me lor. XD somehow i look young.. ( according to my group members, and practically everyone who was shocked that my group leader was younger than me. XD )

NINJA TURTLES!!! that was my group name.. hahaha.. nicknamed the hokkien turtles cos all our cheers were hokkien. XD super funny. hahahah.. oh i nvr teach my group the hokkien cheers one hor.. it was my group leader. hahaha! not me. really! XD

the wet games were insane la. hahahaha. i nvr gotten so disgusted playing games before. there was this game which was something like dog and bone, just that there was this kiddy pool (those in that plastic bowl-like things... then just fill with water..) and when our numbers were called we had to enter the pool and search for the item that was called out. sounds easy? heres the catch- the pool seriously had everything inside. heres some. bottles, bottlecaps, 10 cent coins, mud, grass, insects (fake insects. ), bread ( yes, they threw bread inside. like a few slices.. after a few rounds of playing, the bread broke up and became quite sick.), leftover lunch ( seriously, the station master couldnt finish her lunch and dumped the remainder into the water.) and soap, detergent, vinegar, soy sauce, and like super other lots of sick stuf.. oh. the water was a SUPER muddy brown, and it STINKED LIKE HELL. SERIOUSLY. oh and did i mention that the items we searched for didnt always float? most of the time we had to bend down into the water and search the bottom for it. SUPER SICK. to do it you had to like. ignore the fact that yr in an awkward position with food floating all around you. XD hahahah! i hope you arent eating as youre reading this. XD

okay... another wet game was the one where we had to burn finish a candle. XD sounds easy? well. first we had to fill a bowl with water to get the matches out before we can light the candle. and to do that we had to throw a ball into a target area which will determine how many people can go forward to fill their BOTTLECAPS with water to fill the bowl. btw. the bowl was the size of your normal rice bowl. so you can imagine how long we took. hahaha.. sumore the target was quite.. small.. hahaha.. anyway we eventually did that.. and we started burning the candle. heres the screwed up part. we can do anything to burn the candle. XD we happened to have chopsticks from a previous game ( we had to spin 3 times around on a mat and, like dog and bone, race to pick up a marker with a pair of chopsticks and lift it up high to show the station master), so we set the chopsticks on fire, set like. all the matches on fire, and burnt both ends of the candle AS WELL AS the cardboard that the candle was resting on. oh and we burnt the matchbox as well. and err.. we had a little groupfire and it almost got out of hand. HAHAHHA! but it was super fun. XD

Anyway.. day 2.. the amazing race was quite fun.. the activities were quite unique. there was one whereby we had to spell "one camp reloaded" with dominos and the dominos had to flow (like, you know.. form a chain, such that u only need to tip one over and the words would all spell it out.. ) it took us some time.. and the place was like super windy. hahaha! but it was like super shiok when we're done and we toppled the dominos. hahhaa!

I think, we all have alot to be thankful for our skit that night. hahahah! cos we didnt know the whole storyline that we were supposed to stick to and we just came up with what we knew... so err.. the last part, where no one could hear, was a blessing in disguise for many err... reasons. :D hahahaha! really. i was so happy that no one understood our skit in the end ( though everyone found it quite funny. XD ) but most importantly was that my group had fun! :D hahaha!

I found each night super enriching! :D even when everyone was super tired, every night without fail the OCEAN members who attended the camp met up to reflect about their day... it was super cool! hahaha! and heartwarming.... like... not many opportunities for OCEAN to bond together and that was one of the rare times we really felt like a cell group.. :) oh well. i hope the others felt the same way too! :D

Oh yea. i think those OCEAN people that went.. i think through this camp, we all really got closer! :D hahaha! we got to know each other better and all ( NONE of us actually wanted to go for the camp. but we signed up anyway. and ALL of us had thought of ponning the camp. but we still went anyway. HAHAH! super funny. XD) oh and after the camp, we spent some time as an OCEAN and talked and fellowshipped with each other... :D

Then some of us went for dinner. 5 hours non-stop of laughing. hahaha! we went anchorpoint to the koufu there to eat pasta and thats when we already started joking around and laughing... then alden paid for this kiddy car ride for me (1 dollar. he wasted 1 dollar just to see me embarrass myself. hahaha! ) which is available on facebook. XD i laughed super hard until i almost cried from the laughter ( seriously. my stomach hurt so bad and tears were coming out. i dont know why. i guess i was laughing so hard. HAHAHA!) and there were like. TONS of people watching me as i did that. seriously. like MANY FAMILIES just stopped to see and laugh. hahaha! from the beginning of the ride till the end. hahaha! super funny. XD

After that we went to eat SNOW ICE!:D its like. SUPER NICE LA. hahaha! first time i ate it was at SFTF appreciation and i loved it. ahahaha! then we had it in one camp on day 2 night for supper ... and we couldnt have enough so we ate it again :D hahaha! super goood XD oh. and from there we talked until like 10 plus. Alden, Alex, Leroy, Hengguang, Elvira, Yunying, Alicia, and me. we talked about alot of things (all funny one. not gossip. dont worry ;D ) and eventually we got stuck talking about fairfield funny stories. like. you know. the legends. hahaha! as in the legacy our batch left behind and the 10 years of screwed up things that happened. XD hahaha! super funny. like the P6 ghost classroom incident.. and the teachers we made crazy.. and the debate that we won.. and the combined science and triple science conflict ( okay, fine. its actually the triple science vs the rest of the level. HAHHA! ) and so many more funny stories. oh man... i totally miss fairfield and the crazy things we do in the school.. :( so sad that poly we dont do anymore crazy stuff. ( at least i dont. :( its like so sad la. the craziest thing i did so far that got my adrenaline running was illegally entering the convention center and running away from that cleaner woman when she heard us and started to climb up the stairs to catch us. isnt that sad? like. thats so tame and lame compared to what we did as fairsians *oops* i meant newtown. or or AC! hahaha! XD) The lanshops, police, discipline masters, teachers and principal all must miss us terribly :( cos fairfield is like so boring the moment we left. like seriously. haahhaha! i can totally say that my secondary school days i will never forget. all the crazy things we did :D oh well. oops. basically, i miss fairfield. XD hahaha!

well. after that talking and laughing i really felt like all the stress in the world was gone. XD i felt super light and energized despite the lack of sleep. hahaha! and i felt super bonded to those people . in fact after the camp i felt super bonded to OCEAN people already. now its like. i cant wait to go church tmr. XD its gona be so fun! :D hahaha!

So yea. time to sleep! :D poor mund has been snoring with the lights on for so long. hahahah! :D

2009-06-09T09:32:00.000-07:00

Lets just say im screwed for stats.

Oh well.

Study Study Study.. not.

Aiya. i'm hoping that that paper will be more of application than memory. cos i dont think i can vomit out anything. just can.. er... crap.. XD

Today was holiday. didnt really want to go out as i wanted to relax ( havent done so in a looong time T_T )

And maybe just do a bit of reflecting. of which i couldnt do either. HAHA! maybe tmr after exams.. or smth.. i need to spend some time alone or i'll just waste more of my life away. XD gotta reflect and pull myself back together. HAHA!!! woo!

hmm.. interesting things that happened recently... nope.. cant think of any.. XD hahaha!

I just dont know what to think about what has been happening in my life recently. part of me cant be bothered to think, part of me dont wanna jump to conclusions, part of me doesnt want to lose what i currently (more or less) have.

Part of me just wanna fulfill my damn goal of getting a masters in psychology ( and now, perhaps a P.H.D. ), in whatever area of psych im interested in and screw everything else.

Cos after all,
You're my wonderwall.

2009-05-25T10:13:00.000-07:00

Will blog after assignments are complete. :D hahaha! super busy nowadays. :(

2009-05-20T08:58:00.000-07:00

Hey all,

I found this from www.funny.com while finding a joke or comic strip relevent to life sciences as part of my assignment, read it, and couldnt get back to doing homework. hahaha!

Enjoy!:D

taken from http://www.funny.com/cgi-bin/WebObjects/Funny.woa/wa/funny?fn=CEJ3B&Funny_Jokes=My_Mother_taught_me

My Mother taught me

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear,! in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day! you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you

2009-05-10T10:29:00.000-07:00

So here goes another week...

I REALLY NEED SOME REST. RAHH!! i need like a whole week of sleeping and doing nothing. hahaha! cant wait for holidays to come XD

Today...

Church was quite interesting i guess. the speaker talked about mothers and honoring our parents and how our parents teach us things. haha! well it was mothers day. XD

fast forward all the way to after church. well we were walking out of ac.. then suddenly for no reason leroy charged alex and brought him down on a grass patch nearby and they kinda wrestled with each other ( GAYS!! HAHAHAHA!) then alex tried to do some akido ( if i rmb correctly he learns akido >.<) move on leroy and out of nowhere this happened

note- no one exactly knew who shouted it first cos it was like almost shouted in unison by everyone. HAHA!

Someone: TAUUUPOK!!!
Everyone else not on the ground: TAUUUPOKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And immediately there was a big taupok pile on a grass patch by a concrete path right next to the road. HAHAHAHAH!!!!

Poor alex was at the bottom, followed by leroy, followed by me and i have no idea who else piled on top of me but there was alot la. hahah! like almost 10 guys XD

CAN YOU IMAGINE THE DRIVERS IN THE CARS WTH-ing and staring at us? HAHAHA! It was such a stomp moment. (hopefully someone DID take a photo and post on stomp. haha! )

Somemore, we were like near the gates of AC, RIGHT NEXT TO THE MAIN ROAD. HAHAHA! and there were alot of people around lor. hahah!

when we walked to the bus stop, there were some people (err.. our friends.. kinda..) asking us whose birthday it was. hahaha! then we told them NO BIRTHDAY! it was just some random taupoking. HAHAHA!

ANDDDD!!!!!!!!!

Amanda dared and challenged me to join them for canoe polo land training on wednesday. ahhaha!

Lets see if i am fit on tuesday. HAHAA! or i might be too tired to bother going on wednesday. XD

2009-05-03T08:02:00.000-07:00

SOoooooooooo............

Yesterday was my parents 32nd anniversary. HAHAHA!! i had no idea myself. XD until my aunt took out a cake and lit a candle and put it infront of my surprised parents. XD hahhaha! super funny. I tot it was just a normal saturday gathering with my aunts and uncles just that they wanted a bbq. XD oh well. we sang the happy anniversary song!

"Happy anniversary to you
Happy anniversary to you
Happy anniversary to *insert jumbled mass of my parents' names"
Happy anniversary to you!"

HAHAHA!

Oh and the cake was great! :D it was like chocolate mousse or smth liddat XD and i ate super lots of it. like 4 slices of cake. and btw the cake has super alot of cream. hahaha! after 3rd slice i was like nauseous from cream already but the cake was just tooooooooo good XD

oh and the bbq was GREAT! hahaha! my cousin can really cook sia. XD everything was super nice. hahaha!

Soooooo today was edmund's birthday. and Leroy and i met up early by coincidence. hahaha!

So heres the conversation.

Me: Hey Leroy
L: Hey.
Me: Eh todays edmund's birthday leh
L: Eh did you get him anything?
Me: No.
L: I feel guilty leh. shall we like get him something from sheng shiong at least?
Me: okay!

So right after that we went down to sheng shiong. then the fun started.

Me: eh what to get ah?
Leroy: no idea. lets get him something funny!
Me: What to gett??????
Leroy: *points to a rice cooker*
Me: AHHAHAHAHAH! (note- started to get high)
*points to a packet of sugar*
*points to Ice Mountain 1.5L*
*points to some wierd fruit*
*points to celery stick*
AHAHAHAHAHHA! okay keep in mind that you have to imagine edmund holding on to each one of those items when receiving it. xD
thats like. THE funny part. his reaction. XD HAHAHAHA!

Then i walked to a broom and was like. EH VERY CHEAP LEH. AHHAHAHAH! CAN BUY FOR MOTHERS DAY. HAHAHAHAHAH!

Then leroy went SET WE BUY FOR MUND.
Then i totaly went "SET!", took it, walked to the cashier. hahaha!

Then at the cashier we saw some chips on sale. so i grabbed them as backup present part 2. HAHAHA!

So we carried the broom and stood at the lift lobby holding it. we tied a shengshiong plastic bag at the "head" there and used a marker to draw a face. HAHAHAHAHA!

then after service we passed it to him infront of everyone.

Me: EH MUND HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
Mund: What the shit. *brushes broom away*
Me: OIIII WE SPENT SUPER ALOT OF TIME ON THE BROOM ONE LEHHH HAHAHAHA!
Leroy: YEA IT EVEN HAS A FACE ON IT!
Me: WE COULDNT FIND A SMALL KID SO THIS WOULD HAVE to DO. HAHAHAHA!

but in the end the broom was left somewhere. hahaha! no idea where XD oh well. hahahah!

Lucky person with a free broom XD

oh well. at least he took the chips XD

Oh and actually i wanted to surprise edmund during lessons my own way. cos teresa was outside holding the cake and trying to light the candle again and again. HAHAH! so i couldnt cos someone already started singing before the cake was brought in :( oh well. hahaha! nvm some other day i shall. XD

hahaha! i think he got a nice surprise. XD

OH OH OH AND DEBORAH IS BACK ALREADY!! AAHHAHAHA! YAYY!!! miss her lots :D HAHAHAH! she was like 1 month early . XD she came back from india cos she got called back due to the Swine flu ( oh wait influenza A. HAHA!) SHE TAPPED ME DURING SERVICE AND I WAS SUPER SHOCKED TO SEE HER!! HAHAHAH! AND EVERYONE IN OCEAN KEPT GIVING HER A WIERD LOOK LIKE SHES NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE BUT IN INDIA. Hahahhaha! oh well good to have her back :D

Went to yuki yaki for lunch with the anfield peeps :D after like. about an hour of deciding where to go. HAHAH! we wanted seoul garden but it was full :(

yuki yaki was great :D but apparently the other table didnt enjoy themselves (we split into 2 tables- 5 per table) cos apparently they didnt have leroy or JJ (the cooks) hahaha! XD just kidding. i think its cos we concentrated alot on eating. hahahah!

The ice cream was super cool. XD we had to freeze the ice cream. ahhaha!

After that we were all super full. XD walked towards esplanade and halfway stopped at some random grass patch to take photo XD

sorry no photos here cos its not with me. XD

After that took bus home. HAHAHA! oh well. and after a short while had to leave for another bbq at gabriel's house. haha! housewarming, even though they like moved there about a year ago XD hahahaha! okay la. the food was good. everything was handmade by gabriel's parents!! HOW COOL WAS THAT?? HAHAHAH!!! preparations must have been crazy though XD

IM TIRED!!! I WANT TO SLEEP!! HAHAHA! and i think i finished all the things due tomrorow. i think. XD HAHAH! i hope so :(

2009-04-23T08:48:00.000-07:00

I guess i owe some people an explaination.

To gather my thoughts i'll be writing down qualities that i find attractive in a girl. :D

As alden did list them down once... so now its my turn.

1. Must be Christian. ( really, hopefully, preferably, a strong Christian to help me in my weak walk. )

Now i gotta explain myself. Some guys like girls with hot legs. Some guys like pretty girls. Some guys like cute girls. In the same way, i somehow find Christian girls attractive. Of course i am always too lazy to mention this fact about Christian girls ( i actually talked about this with a non christian friend in sec school and he actually totally agreed with me )
- Christian girls carry with them a whole bunch of qualities that make them attractive. Hard to explain what these qualities are, but think abit and you might be able to figure it out. Granted that some non-Christian girls do have certain similar qualities, but its usually just a few of those qualities and not the whole entire macdonald's students meal upsize set.
Examples would be trustable, loving, caring, nice, etc etc. ( trust me theres alot more..)

2. Must be decent.

I think its quite self explanatory. HAHA! Must be nice. :)

Now its more or less flexible... i guess...

3. Around my height

Heh. self explanatory. HAHA! i dont mind slightly taller girls. as long as its not super obvious. XD

4. Sporty.

Oh that would likely mean that shes slightly tanned. Not too tanned or too fair. just the RIGHT tan would be great. :D
Oh and not tooo muscular please. I think i'll freak out if she has bigger muscles than me. or is like super muscular or something. its all about the guy ego thing. HAHA!

I just hope that she has the same interests as me or something. can talk with me about soccer or tennis and join in those sports with me :)

Hopefully she can play tennis! :D or or maybe soccer too.
Hopefully she can beat alden's future gf/wife in those 2. HAHAHA!

In your face, alden. :D

Oh and yea my children, if i ever have any, are gona so play tennis and soccer. HAHA! And they better support man utd. XD

5.

I guess thats all actually....

Heh i'm really picky eh? :D:D:D
Dont worry im flexible. HAHAHAHAHAHA! okay fine i cant really choose who i like right?
but like alden im like waiting for that perfect girl to come by. HAHAHA! not that she'll like me but oh well.. :(

Actually she doesnt like me. Rejected for so long le :( so sad right? HAHAHAHA!
Its like almost a year. but who cares i dont want relationships now. i gotta get into uni and get a masters :)

I'm handling relationships the alden way. and like ming hui liddat.

Just wait for that perfect girl to come by. :)

When that time comes i'll know shes the one.

AND TO ALL YOU PEOPLE LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP OUT THERE. SINGLE LIFE IS GOOD!!!!!!! LEARN TO LOVE IT!!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D

2009-04-08T10:21:00.000-07:00

Injured my back in tennis. hahaha!

Got owned like crazy in STA.

Apparently because of the whole NP group getting beaten in STA, we're like mostly all serious during tennis trainings now. and the coach gave us the most tiring training on monday. haha! he wanted to train out speed and kinda taught us the split step. hahha! oh well...

found out im one of the slowest in tennis. HAHAHAHA! but i will work on speed later :D

Right after warmups, my back hurt like crap. after that had like 4 hours more of trainings. hahaha! oh well. XD

now for tennis i gotta redo my swings. the way i hit the ball and all. reworking them to add more power and spin. back to the basics. hahaha! my forehand seems okay. but my backhand... sigh.

oh well. i got many bad habits i gotta correct. >.<

Still deciding if i shld go tennis training later.

2009-03-20T06:02:00.000-07:00

Okay, this precamp is actually one of the best camps i've ever gone to.
(and mind you, i've gone to alot. and i'm not proud of it. mostly were torture camps :D)

Firstly though its not a real camp and most of it was just "sampling" the games and activities, it was still super fun. I wont say that it was the activities and games that made it more fun than other camps as the games and activities were like common throughout most camps. the special thing about this camp was that everyone was super uber duper bonded and enthusiastic. seriously. we had 10 people in the group, with 2 house captains ( they werent exactly group leaders cos technically the rest of us were the group leaders. it was a precamp for FOC and those who went for this precamp were those that are going to be group leaders/station masters during the actual camp itself. so its like a bonding camp. )

So that made 8 people in the group. and everyone cheered super loud, everyone was super enthusiastic and crazy and fun. haha!

Lets see. lets start from day 1. though its a 2 day camp only, its seriously super good.

This was how we were roughly sorted. haha! firstly we were asked if we wanted to be a station master or a group leader. haha! then we got seperated. I wanted to be group leader :D
The group leaders were then sorted according to the courses that they were from.

Next the group leaders had to pair up with someone. so err... everyone chose their partners and were assigned to different groups. i was the only group leader from my class so i partnered with someone from another class, but also in pcs. we then went into group B, aka INYO! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

so i met the other group members and we started off with icebreakers. okay. just to point out, at that time i was super tired and unenthusiastic actually. the icebreaker was a bit wierd too. haha! use strings to keep a balloon from touching the floor. then later it was 2 balloons. then 3 balloons. anyway after that i kinda forgot what happened .HAHA! If i rmb correctly, we had to design and colour our house flag. haha!

So we did. apparently none of us could draw/color or was super good in art or anything. so everyone literally contributed to the picture on the shirt. ( it was a lion. so everyone drew a part of the shirt, and coloured. all according to our theme ) and it actually turned out SUPER NICE! HAHAHA! the colours were bright and eye catching and the lion looked cute :D the funny part was the trees which at first didnt look like trees, but after that looked great too :D (INYO meant forest. hahaa! so we tried to crap that the lion is the king of the forest, though its not even found in a forest. haha! )

we had lunch at makan place (meals not provided T_T) and played games after that. the game was quite interesting. the first one was about us being stranded on a desert island and each person being able to bring one item to survive on the island. haha! super funny. we were joking that it was a dessert island, so we just gona bring a spoon. haha! after that we had to combine them all into a machine. haha! or smth liddat. so we got super creative. haha! we had a caravan which had a swiss army knife, air con, water cooler, laptop with wireless, inflatable bed and so on. haha! how to get electricity? we had pikachu put on the top of the caravan, attached to the generator. hahaha! so that it can also absort the lightning. HAHA!!!

but guess what. the house that we were up against also thought of USING POKEMON! AHHAHAHAHA! super funny! hahaha! but cant help it. lets just say some of the members in that group are close to me so they'll probably have the same crazy ideas as i do. hahaha! XD *hint hint* actualyl its quite obvious who they are. who else is obsessed with pokemon in poly? HAHAHAH!

next was the flourball. yes. flourball. basically, a table with a line in the middle, with a pile of flour in the middle of the line, and a ping pong ball placed on top. the objective? to blow the ball to the opponent's side and make the ping pong ball drop there. ( the opposite ends. the sides dont count. )

The trick is that we werent allowed to lean over the table, and had to stand and some distance away from the table, and werent allowed to bend our knees. so some people had to grab my arms and hold me back as i leaned forward to blow away the ping pong ball. hahaha!

The result? white shirt, white pants, white face, white hair, out of breath. haha!

And i soloed for the first few rounds while playing against 3 people from the opponent team. haha!

After that game we played some candle and water bomb game. so er. we had some materials (newspaper, straws, lots of masking tape) to build a protective cover for our candle and we had to protect it while trying to extinguish the opponent's one. apparently we made lots of decoys and there was a group huddle to protect everything. haha! and i chionged to attack. the game ended super fast. hahaha.. since there was only 1 candle XD

Anyway i was super soaked after that cos well theres so little guys in the camp, and yet we're all playful. hahaha! and since the game ended fast, there was alot of water bombs. so err.. yea well its quite obvious what happened after that :D

And the last of the morning games was the table maze. hahaa! THIS GAME.. IS ACTUALLY QUITE FUN. HAHA! you remember last time in primary school we used to play this game where we were on a balance beam and had to play scissors paper stone with the opponent? whoever loses have to go to the back of the line and the winner is when the person gets to the other end of the balance beam?
This game is somewhat similar.

Firstly the tables kinda made a maze with alot of bends. so the person has to run to meet the opponent, and after they meet, instead of scissors paper stone, THEY HAD TO ANSWER A MATH QUESTION. (simple math. but sometimes got ridiculous multiplications like 17 x 18. haha! ) so on the spot gotta calcualte. hahaha!!! SUPER FUNNY! esp when people have ridiculous answers :D but anyway the hard thing is after running and adrenaline being so high, its not easy to suddenly try to calculate. haha! so the first person to answer the question correctly gets to advance :D

i couldnt even win ONE bloody math question. HAHA! even though i could run super fast and gain alot of ground, but when they ask the question i always take super long to calculate. XD i mean im in HMS for a reason right? hahaha!

But later it switched at random times to general knowledge questions (extremely random questions like whats the first planet from the sun to what time does macs have lunch offer. HAHA! and the funniest moment was when the question was "who is Singapore's prime minister and one group answered LKY instead of LHL. HAHA! SUPER FUNNY! HAHAHAH! and another hilarious moment was when the question was on who was our minister of education and there was absolute silence for quite a while before someone shouted balakrishnan (duno how to spell. haha!) Super funny, super fun. :D

My group sadly lost that game. hahaa! but its okay. after that we were chanting "EVEN THOUGH WE LOST WE KNOW WE'RE WINNERS!!!" haha. super useful cheer :D HAHAA! TRYO! :D
Its a combination name of triver and inyo! :D cos we were combined and allied together for a few games. haha! then the opponent's combined group was lala (walla and keala)

So our spirits and morale was still super high even after losing. haha!

I cant really rmb what happened after that. if im right it was feedback session on the games. haha! then after that we had to plan for our campfire item. and cheers and so on.

Night games were fun! but hte finale was the highlight. haha! it was once again water bombs with candles. but this time we werent given waterbombs. it was EXCO and station masters vs TRYO vs LALA and our objective was to use the candles to burn some rafia strings while the exco + sm's objective was to prevent us from doing so. we were alos supposed to attack our rival group's candles to slow them down. haha!

But, in the end, due to the great bond among everyone and the familiarity, the 2 groups did not attack each other but even helped each other. haha!!! so in the end it was tryo + lala against the sm's and exco. haha! super funny. actually we didnt help each other much. it was more of a truce treaty. haha! we just didnt attack each other, though the exco + sm's promised that they'll be less aggressive if we attacked each other. haha! but we didnt care :D we had the advantage of numbers. haha!

Super fun. it was similar to LT camp just that this was smaller scale, not so rough, and not so crazy and disorganised. haha! but also required less strategy. haha! instead of doing hte group thing and using the pincer attacking strategies like in LTC, we just ran and chionged with the candle and protected the string area. haha!

after that was wash up and sleep. :D i stayed up to watch southpark with a friend. THE COON! HAHAHA!stayed up and waited 3 hours just to watch a 30 minute episode. :D but still its super nice :D then after that went to sleep in my own bunk. super cold that night though. haha!

next morning was crazy. got my results through sms like around 8.15. was woken up at 8.10 by my friend exclaiming his results in surprise. haha! then after that alot of people woke up to check their hps. XD hahaha! everyone was super crazy la. hahahaha. i ran out with marcus and through the corridors screaming that we passed. XD HAHAHA! i think we woke alot of people up. but i had this gut feeling that alot of people was up too cos of their results. haha!

fast forward to amazing race. :D we went from NP to the merlion near the esplanade, then walked to the ww2 memorial, and walked to National library at bugis, then to the glass house fish and co (near plaza sing), then to vivo. haha! super fun. we actually RAN when we just had to WALK. HAHAHA! as such i think we were like the fastest group.

This amazing race was unique. haha! cos our hints sheet, which gave us hints on where to go, were arranged in a tic tac toe style. so err... each box would have a hint. and we had to play bingo with where we went, so we had to like make a line of completed stations on the hints paper. it was 3 by 3, but the actual camp will be 4 by 4. haha!

we were so fast, we completed 2 lines. in like. 4 hours altogether. haha! each line completed gives us 200 points. a loose station ( one that does not form a line ) gives only 50 points. haha! so we got like 400 points!!! (though the points are like.. for nothing? haha! in the end there was no winning group. XD)

So after amazing race we had debrief and we prepared for "campfire" and massdance. haha! the camp theme was actually bollywood. :D so yea. haha! our mass dance was the bollywood version of pretty woman. :D super nice! hahaha! and quite fun to do also. hahahha.. so yea. after that we had "campfire". ( there was no fire, no stage, no equip. its just a practice for the actual thing. haha! like a sample. but we still had to perform what we had after like 3 hours of planning only T_T) my group danced bollywood to always be my baby by david cook. haha! hilarious. we had a gay couple ( me and ky. T_T ) and we had to act out the song as it was playing. haha!

But still. it was quite fun. :D even though campfire items are like super annoying. haha...

after that we were dismissed. :)

Sadly, the camp was not longer. haha! cos it was like super fun. T_T

Back to tennis trainings for me. :D

2009-03-07T08:45:00.000-08:00

This has totally been a sports week.

Monday- played tennis (CCA) . rained, so alot of people zhaoed. but we stayed and waited until no rain then went for dinner with the tennis people. hahaha! had a great time of talking with them.

Tuesday- went out to eat ice cream. went coldrock, then venesia, then island creamery, and finally daily scoop. wanted to go swensons at holland v too but in the end my friend said it didnt look nice so didnt eat there. hahaha...

Wednesday- Played tennis with shaiz, then went with shaiz to NP for soccer with the anfield people and tennis. haha! soccer was fun. i actually scored a goal. HAHAHA!!! though its quite a fluke. but still nice. XD anyway altogether we played from like 2 to 8. HAHAHA! 2 hours tennis, 4 hours soccer/tennis. XD even though in soccer i was already exhausted like crazy, somehow adrenaline allowed me to give short bursts of speed during soccer. but most of the time after sprinting im too tired to handle the ball. hahaha.. XD saw some tennis people playing, and since i had my racket with me i went to join them for a while, as the soccer people were waiting for some people to come. yea well. went home and felt all the strain. luckily i didnt have to wake up early the next day. if not i'll die. XD

Thursday- Had tennis cca. was still quite tired. but stretched abit and felt much better. luckily, we didnt have warmups and the coach came late cos he had some checkup thing. so it wasnt that tiring, but the drills were still killer. after that went with the tennis peeps to eat dinner and went home.

Friday- REST DAY!! actually was supposed to meet marianne. but she couldnt make it. so oh well. ahhaa! used the time to rest and recuperate so that at least i wont die on saturday training.

Saturday- (today) went for tennis cca again. but it rained, and there were only candy, me and zi xin so we continued playing since there was no thunder/lightning and the siren was not sounding. we played until there was thunder then took shelter and waited. after that, had to dry the courts and i kinda dried one whole court by myself. T_T. felt super tired after that but still played. haha! there was no training, just free play. so i (kind of) rallyed with zi xin and norman and candy.

If kneecap problems are hereditary, i'll probably stop walking by the end of this holiday. AHHAHA! i signed up for a tennis tournament (Singapore tennis association) that is in april and i gotta train hard for it. i signed up just to get experience, so dont expect me (i dont think anyone will though. im super lousy in tennis) to get a medal or anything. i just wanna at least win first round, then dont care le. hahaha! gotta brush up on alot of things before the tourny so i've been chionging sports and tennis. all so that i wont embarrass myself in the tourny. haha! alot of people in tennis club signed up, and all of them can totally thrash me. so im like soooo hoping i dont meet them in first round. or i'll sit down and play tennis. HAHA!

Hopefully, i'll make it past first round in STA :D

2009-02-26T10:43:00.000-08:00

gabby asked me to blog, so i'll blog. HAHAHHAHAH!

EXAMS ARE OVERRRRRRRRRRR OVER OVER OVER!!!!!!!

i never felt so relieved before. not even after o's. HAHAHAHA! BUT ITS OVER!!!!!!

and i'm devoting the entire holidays to sports. gona play soccer and tennis. gona CHIONG! HAHAHAHAH! WOOOO!!!!!!!!! im gona try out for school team. XD as for the er... problems with payment and all.. i'll figure smth out. hahaha! oh well :D

WOO TENNIS!!

tmr playing with enoch. hahahah! and maybe shaiz. if he can wake up. cant wait! AFTER SO LONG FINALLY I GET TO PLAY TENNIS! HAHAHAHAH!

2009-02-09T05:44:00.000-08:00

Kenn got beaten badly in tennis today.

played a short singles 4-game match with a fellow tennis player today. (hes really good, actually. school team material. i'm pretty sure he'll get in. in fact i think hes way better than some in the sch team)

First game was like. bad. i got 1 point ( he double-faulted) while he won the game. it was his service. couldnt take the ball at all. he slice-served and the problem with this was that he could hit it such that it would drop just after the net (making it somewhat like a drop shot) or he could hit it and spin it fast. in the rare scenario where i returned the ball, he would hit a fast topspin to my backhand and the opening in the court. though i might be fast enough to get to the ball and hit it, it doesnt go over the net cos i cant counter the spin. (its quite heavy). (okay i'm making excuses. HAHAHA! bottom line is, he owned and kept his service game)

Second game was my service. i double faulted like once i think. while trying to copy his serve. after that i gave up on the slice serve and hit my normal serve. he kept return aceing me (means, the moment i serve, he returns the ball and scores) by hitting it to my backhand and open side right after service. and though i can reach the ball in time, i cant bring it over the net. this one was slightly more even. i got 2 points while he cleared the game. even for the occasional super nice service that i hit, he was still able to return. sigh.

Third game was his service again. Lost totally. i think he double faulted once. so i think i had one point. oh well... :(

After that i was so devastated by it that i couldnt play the other games properly. sigh. okay la.. in my opinion hes like the best in tennis cca, and hes year 1. he just makes a few unforced errors now and then.but other than that his spins and controls and speed is really good.

Gotta practice returning and service.

Didnt matter if i could spin the ball or play baseline- if the service overpowers everything and if i'm unable to return, theres no game. the service scares the opponent and allows control of the game.

2009-02-08T19:41:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was like hell for me.

There was this persistent pain in my shoulder. i wont say it exactly hurt badly, but it was extremely irritating. it didnt feel much like a muscle ache or anything. i think its a strain from coughing. It was like the pain was from inside (hard to describe) imagine a thorn in your flesh, but the skin is unharmed. so its more like er.. internal pain? not sure. it didnt bug me much for the whole day, until the late afternoon when the pain was starting to get extremely irritating. tried massaging my shoulder to get rid of the pain and all but it was no use. the pain lingered on and on. it got worse in the night. tried all sorts of medication like those for muscle aches and all and it did not help. so i tried to sleep early to get rid of it.

But apparently i couldnt sleep. even while i was asleep i was thrashing about because of the pain. kept having wierd dreams ( dreams where the pain was inside too, somehow ) and kept waking up to the pain ( it felt like the pain had spread to my entire shoulder and side ) and apparently i was punching the bed in frustration. fed up, i got up and walked around the house and got a glass of water and such and went to the toilet to splash water at my shoulder in hopes of relieving the pain. but still nothing worked. went back to bed and tossed around again. after a while i kinda just reasoned out what the pain might be. kinda err... suspected it was arthritis or something so i switched off the aircon and tried sleeping. but the room wouldnt cool fast enough so i went to sleep outside my room. at last i fell asleep and slept properly, but still i woke up due to coughing and such.

I woke up with the pain more or less gone. not sure if i should play tennis later though....

2009-02-01T09:12:00.000-08:00

Saturday... Was class cny reunion. at mdm toh's house again, like last year. only this one was a bit more brief, i think.

It was extremely fun. throughout the whole thing we were like talking and joking around. Mainly our conversations were about the changes that have happened since leaving fairfield about a year ago. Relieving the memories.. and the troubles that we've all gone through. I miss the fun times where almost everyday something funny or fun will happen, and sometimes getting into trouble and laughing about it and joking about it.

I still remember the first sports day we had as a class while in sec 3. we won quite a few medals ( the class with the most medals, if i rmb correctly) and we owned everyone. :D Then again we won model class everytime. We were unbeatable in everything. From sports, to lateness slips. HAHA!

I still remember the GAY DAYS where we had as a class. hahaha! super funny. seriously no other people have such a class culture to gay with others. ( best chest in jurong west- edmund!!! ) hahaah! and well there was a bond of closeness and comfort in each other's presense :D

Our class is seriously the most fun ever. memories treasured and kept so dear. details and moments all remembered and worth a chuckle or smile when reminiscing.

Skipping lessons to do wierd things (like take photos. HAHAHA!)

And yes. we skipped chinese lesson to take this photo... in the rain. HAHA! :D

Then came... the last day as a class... made full use of it and used all our electronic devices on that day ( cannot confiscate!! HAHAHA!). i miss the risky times and the wacky times.. its super hard to find anyone to dare to do such wacky stuff... and here we have a whole class full of them. ahaha!

Then there was founders day dinner/prom thingy.. :D made lots of noise, trouble, and started doing many wierd things at that dinner. hahaha!

And so this is my tribute to the best class in the world, ever. no other class can be this crazy, no other class can be this united, no other class can be this enthusiastic, no other class can be so fun. there just isnt. and even with all these wackiness, we still knew when was the time to study.

of course, ironic that while people are studying, theres someone taking a photo. HAHAHA! oh well... i'm looking forward to the next time we meet as a class again! :)

2009-01-22T06:25:00.000-08:00

many things happened today... firstly it was IP presentation. like FINALLY! hahaha! hmm.. i think my grp did average bah.. :D hahaha okay thats being modest my grp did above average i guess.. XD okay fine i dont know cos i wasnt listening much to the other presentations.. was just seeing if they could engage the audience, checking their presentation skills, and seeing if their study was done well. XD hahaha!

HAHAHA! dont worry... if i knew those people presenting i was listening more attentively one.. XD hahaha! :D i can multitask even when playing. AHHAHAH! or talking. XD

hahahaha.... so yea. i duno how my team did. but i think we did okay bah.. :D but maybe the lecturers dont think so. HAHA!

Okay.... report left.. >.<

more exciting and lively news-

In tennis today...

Kenn played spins. not his usual spinning, but this time he was forced to spin the ball like ALOT. one of his tennis friends bought a new racket ( BORIS BECKER!!!! ) and well... kinda had VERY SICK SHOTS after that. seriously. SUPER SPIN SIA! top spin super good, slices super good. hahaha! and the topspins was fast and low.

So what did kenn do? kenn the retard played spins too. he tried spinning the ball as much as he could- grip change, body turn, bent knees, and jumping while hitting. AHHAHA! that was to counter his ball spins- spin the ball alot, so that he will have difficulty spinning back. XD hahah! well he countered my topspins with his slice, but that makes me topspin back at him with even more spin. HAHAH! okay la.. in the end kenn still cannot compare with kenn's friend.. kenn too noob le.. >.< AHAHA! but quite cool... Kenn rmbers last sem when everyone like cannot play liddat. XD hahaha! then now all can play. power sia... all play super good also. hahah!

But Kenn thinks.. today his game improved... concentrated on topspins.. so the balls didnt really go into the net. XD hahaha! and during drills most of the balls he hit went straight back to the coach. XD ( actually this is a bad thing, as he spins the ball back to the opposite side of the court, making Kenn run like siao.) but still Kenn likes the challenge. :D hahaha! wooo!!! gotta play more tennis. XD hahaha! Kenn is motivated to perfect the topspins. XD

2009-01-13T04:04:00.000-08:00

hahaha. sian. my grp's first setback. nvm. we'll work hard to do it better!!!! :)

2009-01-04T06:44:00.000-08:00

ARGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

i did something i shouldnt have done today.
During cell, i kinda said something and talked about something while discussing that is totally out of doctrine. that my group leaders was all so skeptical about. sigh. i guess its.. abit more of my opinion than God-led and i cant believe i could claim something like that without any biblical evidence ( actually, the bible does not support the statement i made. not only is there no evidence for it, but the bible actually said something else about it. then my opinion was somewhat totally different from what the bible mentions.)

thinking about it, i cant seem to convince myself and pull myself out of that opinion. sigh. im in trouble la. this is what happens when qt is affected badly. argh....

Get back on track, Kenn, before you start a cult.

I'm gona.. stay low.. until my walk improves.. i dont wanna stumble anyone.

What would have happened if the entire cell group believed in what i said and not the bible? sigh... i duno if what i said affected them in anyway. i hope not. i hope theyll forget it. arghhh.. its so out of doctrine.

2009-01-02T05:14:00.000-08:00

And now the new year has come.

Can't exactly say im super happy that its another year. hahaha..

but oh well.. cant stop time from passing, can i? :D

Still. i've made some resolutions for the year

1. Improve in tennis
2. Learn to slice in tennis
3. Be consistent for shots in tennis
4. Buy a new tennis racket
5. Learn to topspin in tennis
6. Learn to serve properly in tennis ( with more power and consistency and spin)
7. Get into tennis school team
8. Improve in jumping and stamina
9. Lose weight
10. Be able to run 42km
11. Exercise
12. Improve in grades (aiming 4.0 though its impossible. HAHAHA!)
13. Go scuba diving again
14. Mature
15. Grow taller
16. Study hard
17. Take studies seriously
18. Make a choice on where to go next time

HAHAHA! and yea. i've been reflecting about the year. :D hahaha!

08 was a great year. from the o levels results till now.. it feels like such a long time cos of all the different things that has happened since then. it truly is very eventful! :D and now another year has passed. hahahaha.. i miss my friends in fairfield and i wish i can see 4B as a whole class again but somehow i doubt it can happen. i really miss the stress free days in sec sch. i miss the class not bothering much about studies in like sec 3.. it was like carefree days.. and those days we could like not do hw and it doesnt matter.

Sadly those days are long gone and somehow now theres so many changes. i've never worked so hard until i entered this course. not even for o's. and i've never bothered so much about studying. and theres many things that call for me to change and mature and grow to suit the environment that i'm in. its quite hard to change from the playful person i am to someone who takes work seriously. but if i dont i wont be able to pursue what i wanna do in the future (which, ironically, is actually something fun and interesting).

Looking back at the entire year, my walk with God has been a downhill thing. Since mission trip from the beginning of the year, it has had many ups and downs. but somehow i was able to improve and get back the passion. somewhere in the middle of the hectic year, i find that i've lost the passion and purpose. and the dilligence to carry out His will. i'd say its cos of all the things that are happening around me and how disappointing and depressing some events are, and how the problems around me cant seem to be solved and how new ones are cropping up and piling up. but i know i dont have anyone to blame but myself. its really because i'm too stupid and stubborn.

I'm tired of alot of things. Sick and tired from it. i hope it does not carry on into this new year.

Lord, please give me strength and dilligence. and understanding and care and intelligence and wisdom and composure and readiness and faithfullness and happiness and virtue.

2008-12-21T08:44:00.000-08:00

Soon.. quite soon... its time to cut off and stay away...

2008-12-20T06:47:00.001-08:00

Today... we had the Christmas party! :D quite fun. not bad. haha! kinda like student night. but i think student night was more effective and fun, just more messy. HAHA! oh well. XD

Yesterday went for danzation. HAHA! super nice... but i kinda lost focus towards the end. was thinking about the farewell party for lincoln. :( sigh. i really wanted to go there. then was considering whether i should pangsei my friends at the dance and zhao for the party or not. but before i knew it, danzation kinda ended. but at 10. and it was too late for me to go. :(

Anyway! GABBY DANCED SUPER WELL!! :D haha! but i kinda lost her when they mixed up their places. hahah! oh well. :( and so did the other people in my course who are in NRA. :D haha!

I shall blog about the 4B class chalet, cos i think its hilarious what we actually did during it. XD

Sadly, i shall start only when i reached the class chalet. Went there late cos of puppet practice. oh well. hopefully i didnt miss much. anyway met them at the bike stands and they rented a bike for me and a few others. had to wait for the rest to come before starting our expedition. so we kinda went back to our chalet to change and all. apparently we had a new game- taking out the key and hiding it. hahaha! mainly syam did it. XD then kept pretending he didnt have the key. Oh and there were no girls. just 13 guys in 1 room. XD and so things were abit wild. ahha!

anyway... fast forward to when we were about to start the expedition. everyone reached and we were on our bikes and cycling around the bike stands to warm up and all. then the greatest and most perfect thing happened- Sinlih's bike got dechained and the chain was stuck among the gears. like quite badly stuck.

We tried many ways to get it out. then tried using the bike lock to hook over the chain so that we can try to pull it out. hahahah. then we tried borrowing a spanner and screwdriver from the engineering dept there. but they didnt allow. when i tried again they said they cant lend to strangers. great. so some guys went to cycle to the nearest petrol station ( actually most of the guys. but they didnt cycle to the petrol station. they said they went one round. haha!) and while that happened, we kinda made jokes about giving sl the key to the bunk and going off without him. or makeing up a reason to pangsei him. ( like ehh. we go find tools. brb sl! then all zhao ) ahhahaha but im sure its all jokes ( i hope it is. HAHA) well after the group left we kinda brought the bike to some staff there and asked them if they have a screwdriver. then two of the staff, one guy one girl, came to help us. hahaha. tried all ways, and they actually borrowed a fork from their office to help us. hahaha. well the fork broke. XD
So the girl went to the engineering dept to borrow a screwdriver. but it couldnt turn the screw. a few of us tried it but cannot. then some guys came back from the cycling thing and tried but also cant. then the girl suggested hammering on the chain abit using the screwdriver and after 3 taps the chain came free. wow. HAHA! altogether, we kinda took like 2 hours. so we started off at around midnight like that. wow. haha!

Guess where our destination was. HAHA. 13 guys.. so err... we cycled to geylang to eat. hahahah! nothing else. dont worry. XD and on the way there, we passed by expo. and duno who went to suggest going to near the halls' open space there. so we did. and we cycled happily there. super nice. one huge wide long road. hahaha! sumore the place was like. super foggy. hahaha! it was like a thing of the horror shows. the hall could hardly be seen, even with all the lights. XD but actually it was foggy cos they were spraying the insecticide thingy. hahaha! but super cool. we cycled in and could barely see infront. then we kinda stopped cos the leader kinda stopped. when we gathered, he was like. "eh. you know why we came here for? cos he said last time we come here for the A7X concert.. then very nice. so we cycled in." after saying that, we were like WA LAO!!!!!!! And he turned the bike 180 degrees and cycled back to the main road. and we followed. then very suddenly got this *POP* sound. found out that some genius dude burst his back tyre. HAHA! perfect. so they were trying to see how bad it is and all, then the security guard came to chase us out. we used the excuse that we wanted to buy drinks and joked and one of us asked the guard if he had a spare tyre tube. then the guard kind of obviously answered no. HAHA! then the guy replied. " oh i didnt know. i was hoping you'll keep one spare one somewhere" or something like that. AHAH!!! HILARIOUS!

In the end, the hole was quite huge and we couldnt repair it. or patch it. so jem took the bike with the punctured tyre and gave his bike to that genius. hahahha! and jem could still cycle sia. XD except up the slopes, where he was panting like siao. hahaha. but he still did it. XD

anyway we continued on to geylang. when we reached, we were cyling in one line along the road. hahahah.. super alot of pubs. then outside the pubs got super lots of people... some smoking and err.. soliciting. hahaha. interesting.... XD anyway we kinda got lost and were cycling in a huge circle twice. while looking for a place to eat. hahaha. nowhere that was halal i think. thats why. the main highlight was this alley place which was a bit dark ( darker than the main road ) whereby some indian men were like saying " hello bicycle boys! you want some girl girls?" hahaha! we kinda just ignored them and cycled past. HAHA! but i was trying to contain my laughter. XD hahaha! okay im evil. hahahhaa.. but i found it all funny. hahaha! then at that same alley, we came to a T junction and the leader was discussing where to go. XD then this uncle apporoched sl and started talking to him. according to sl, the uncle was like (in chinese) " last time i used to cycle like you boys. then always cycle to over there. (then he pointed down the road) then sl asked him "cycle there for what?" then the uncle replied "to play la!" ( qu4 na4 bian1 wan2! )wan means play. but play has 2 meanings. kinda means "fun" hahaha. oh well. XD we took it as the er... kind of fun that is associated with the place... if you know what i mean. HAHA! and we were laughing abt it later. XD evil us. apparently there was an area where by there were indian women ( whom we suppose were people err... working around there... ) then after that there was an area with cross dressers. according to some guys. XD but i didnt see it. apparently they saw some "woman" walking up to a group of guys (not us. ) and grabbing one of their arms and said something in a low low voice. the group of guys were kinda like "whoa whoa" then backed away super quickly and zhaoed from "her". hahah! oh well. XD anyway in the end halfway after crossing the main road jem's bike the tyre ( the punctured one) the rubber part of the tyre came out from the metal part. so cannot cycle liao. so we brought it to the nearby petrol kiosk. then borrowed their toolbox and bought some drinks. hahah..

apparently when deric and i were in the stall, two women came in and we kinda like avoided them ( we were abit paranoid. haha! >.< ) when we went to pay for the drinks... err.. i kinda while waiting for deric to pay.. i kinda left the bottle i bought at the counter.. so i didnt have to carry it while deric was paying. and err.. one of the woman grabbed it while looking at me. then i was like "shi4 wo3 de" then she let go and i grabbed it and zhaoed. haha. quite quickly. and deric was like "okay lets run". hahah! we're so bad >.< anyway err.. out side the stall deric was kinda like "shoots i said the wrong word. wanted to say go but said run instead" HAHA! but apparently he said later that when we were in the stall with the two women, one of them were saying something like " those two boys? want? " then the other one said something like " so young. you go ask. " They apparently said it jokingly. haha! and they were saying it in dialect to each other. then deric apparently said they purposely wanted to tease us. wad the. we're two underage boys lor.

well we saw lots of things while trying to repair the bike at the petrol kiosk. hahaha. there was two guys and girls going to the atm. then the guys were withdrawing money. withthe girls watching. hahah. wad the. then another case was two guys playing scissors paper stone outside the kiosk and then when one lost, that guy entered the store with apparently his shirt covering his face. to buy condoms. HAHAHAHA! super funny. XD then another case was this car driving in for petrol. at first we thought its only the driver but suddenly a girl "sat up". HAAHHA! then while the guy was in the store the girl was apparently searching for something in the car. we kinda guessed that she was like looking for money.. or something.. then were talking about how hard life is for them and how they actually are in such bad need for money. sigh. then took pity on them. oh well.. i guess its kinda true. i mean. i'm sure like most of them unwillingly took up such jobs...due to many problems and reasons...

Anyway to fix the tyre.. we kinda errr. "borrowed" some tyre tubes and tyres from the nearby bike shop. which was closed. hahah.. dont worry its those discarded ones.. those with holes and all.. anyway none of them actually fitted... only one of the tubes... but it had a hole. haha! so we kinda used salom pas i think. ( i duno how to spell it ) to patch up the hole. its the one for muscle aches and all. hahah! works like deepheat spray i guess. XD and we pumped in air and we were off! :D took about 3 hours i think. haha.. was almost 4.. and we had to chiong back to pasir ris to avoid traffic. and so we did. oh and err... yi wei kinda punctured a tyre like halfway. haha! and jem took the punctured bike again. XD after that, shaun got leg cramps and also due to his knee injury and so he took taxi back, taking the bike with the punctured tyre back with him. and so we continued on with our journey. hahah! chionged and all.. then when we were about to reach back the chalet, got another POP sound and we found out that that genius punctured another tyre. hahaha. genius. XD but we were nearby. and super tired. reached back when the sky was like quite bright. HAHA! i think it was like 6 plus when we reached. XD and we were all tired and our bums aching like crazy ( the seat super hard and uncomfortable. XD when we wanted to set off from the geylang petrol kiosk.. we were all shouting in pain. haha! )and i went with some guys to go eat breakfast while the rest went to sleep. XD then after that bathed and slept. hahaha.. in the morning.. until like about 11 plus where we had to return bike. to loyang there.

we reluctantly got up ( we almost couldnt. ) and chionged there cos we were late. and that genius who burst 2 tyres was nowhere to be seen. so i pushed his punctured tyre bike and my bike all the way to loyang, which is super far.and the genius's bike the punctured tyre got stuck and couldnt move. so i was actually quite angry and cursing all the way. since everyone had to chiong to return their bikes. and i was too tired to ride any of the bikes there. tsktsk. anyway some guys came back to help after they returned. hahah. so i guessed it was okay. then while we were talking with the auntie about payment for the punctured tyres they kinda called the genius and found out he was outside the chalet there apparently sleeping. ARghHH. i so wanted to kill him. super tired liao still disappear like that. anyway we met him on the way back and kinda bluffed him that we forgot to help him take his ic. hahaha. but halfway when he was going to the bike shop we stopped him and went back to the chalet. i kinda forgot what we did. oh yea we went back to the chalet and watched tv. OH OH and guess who i met at cheers there? HAHA! HONG LINGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!! =D HAHAHAHAH! she called my name and i turned and was super shocked to see her. XD hahaha! went back to the chalet after that to watch tv. XD we were watching the price is right. hahahah! super funny. XD and some cooking show after that. hahahaha! kinda forgot what happened after that. i think i went to sleep. hahah. then woke up for the bbq and to start the fire and all. haha. and while starting the fire. guess who i saw. HAHAHAH! NAIIMAH!!! =D i called out her name and ran to her. hahaha. apparently her grp was laughing at us cos we're taking super long to light the fire. hahaha. oh well. XD but anyway we eventually lit the fire and started cooking. and the BBQ was GREAT! :D

Had so much food to eat.. and even the cooks could eat while cooking.. and it was like a very cozy and nice atmosphere for a bbq and we were all guys :D and our number grew abit i guess.. i think around like 18 guys were around. hahaha. all eating their fill and there was no arguements ( like last time's bbqs) and the food was all good ( compliments to sl and wilson! :D ) and i enjoyed myself ( duno abt the rest) after that went to watch soccer then went back down to eat cos it was a bad match ( sg was playing badly... sadly.. ) but chionged back up when i heard there was a goal, only to find out it was offside even though it was an own goal. hahaha. sian. XD oh well. continued tending to the fire and cooking and eating. XD after that, kinda went "visiting" with some guys. walked along the beach and all. hahaha! XD we went to visit hongling at her chalet and just said hi and zhaoed. XD

OH OH OH we saw something quite funny. HAHA! on the way there we were at a carpark and there was this car with all the lights off but the engine was on. at first i was like. why is the car on ah? then later we saw a hand. HAHAHAHHA! then another hand and legs. XD HAHAHAHAH SUPER FUNNY. then we were like OOOH!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAH!! THEY ARE HAVING PARK F*- well.. err... vulgar. HAHAH! but super funny. HAHAHA then one of us actually walked super close to the car until the couple inside it kinda sat up and looked at him. HAHAHA! but we just walked past and started joking about it. AHHAH! super funny. and that was like partly the reason why we didnt stay at Hongling's chalet for long. cos we wanted to go back before they left. HAHAHA! super funny. and on the way back the car's engine was off but the couple was still in there. hahahha. we tried walking past as near to the car as possible ( kaypoh culture.. HAHA!) but in the end we werent exactly close enought to see. so nvm. hahaha. then some of us ran back to the back of the car to see. but apparently they suddenly started running. hahah! duno why. XD apparently according to my friend he said that the couple was like kissing and lying down in the car. hahaha. eeeww.. XD

oh well. after that went to cheers and back to chalet. hahaha. after that, went to play catching at the mall nearby HAHAHA! super funny. we went in through the back door and took the lift up. then got camera. and everyone was like at the side and trying to avoid it. XD went up and it was like all closed except for 1 shop and only some lights were still on. hahhaa.. apparently there was a movie still showing... anyway they played catching there on 2 levels. haha. i sat this one out. was too tired and my legs felt super weak and tired and numb and i was too lazy to run in slippers. XD (oh yea. my sandals broke during cycling at geylang and i had to buy slippers at downtown east after that. XD ) they played a few rounds of catching then after that we got chased out by a guard. hahaha. XD went down to the bowling alley and went to watch people bowl. hahah! super bored. XD then went back to chalet after a while. on the way back, passed by a grp of girls sitting down in a circle at some random spot ( apparently netball girls ) and the guys couldnt help but notice them ( apparently one of them was quite chio and err.. hot. ) hahaha! i kinda didnt see the chio one. haha! but oh well. after that some of us went to cheers to buy drinks and we sat down at another random spot near that grp of girls. hahaha! crazy. XD then when the girls left so did we. and we almost followed them to aloha. ( i didnt notice we were following them until the straight road. where they were infront of us. ) then we stopped so that it didnt seem like we were following them ( we didnt want to stalk. REALLY! just wanted to walk around. stalking is bad. haha! ). anyway we went to the pool at aloha and walked around the chalets. met xingyao and kamranjit ( duno how to spell) at their current poly class' chalet. made us like go. "eh. we not important ah. xingyao dun care us then go for his own class chalet. " hahaha. but we didnt care much anyway. XD walked one round around the place and the shocking thing is one of us, while walking around, took some of the stranger's chalet's leftover food. haha! and its not like those with alot of cooked food leh. it was like. the whole place was empty and clean, and there was just this one plate there with some food on it. and that guy actually took some of the food and ate it. super funny. HAHAH! and he did it twice. XD then we kept talking about food poisoning. hahah! after that i went back to the chalet to sleep while some other guys went to buy breakfast. hahaha.. slept for about 2 hours then at 7 for some reason the guys who went for breakfast suddenly stormed back in and made alot of noise and woke us all up. they wanted to leave the chalet early cos they had nothing to do -_- anyway we all did. we checked out and zhaoed. hahaha. most of them went home to sleep. all super tired. slept on the train. hahah! super funny. we took both sides of the train's seats and its like. 2 rows of guys, left and right, all sleeping. HAHA! and squeezing into those seats. there were like too little seats and too many guys. HAHA! most people went home to sleep after that. but i had to go for YFC even though i was like dying already. :( hahah!

Apparently on the day i checked out jianyang checked in for his class chalet. AHHAHAH! super small world. XD ahhaha.

2008-12-07T08:55:00.001-08:00

Please God.

Take me.

Not others Lord. Leave my loved ones alone.

Take me instead.

Please Lord. i cant bear to see my loved ones like this.

I cant take it. i dont want to see them suffer.

I dont want anything bad to happen to them

Take me in their place. Make me suffer.

Please. Just take me instead. I deserve it more than them.

I am the one who deserves it. Please Lord.

Take me. I am willing to be the one suffering in their place.

2008-12-06T09:17:00.001-08:00

I'm tired. again.

went to help out at simei care centre's flea market the whole day. stayed over at simei care centre last night, didnt sleep until super late cos was preparing for flea market, though i didnt do much cos my brain wasnt working already and i kinda am super lousy at drawing and colouring.

Yesterday. After issues i felt slightly relieved, then when i handed up the ip proposal with shaiz felt even more relieved. after that, kind of had to rush home to pick up some stuff and bathe and chiong to church for student night meeting. was a bit late for it so i asked alden to like find a room in the church where we can hold our meeting. surprisingly, alot of people turned up. alot. and some of them were people we'd never expect to turn up. anyway. alot of changes are being made and many things are going to happen for student night + our followup. sigh. praying hard for it.

After the meeting + prayer we had dinner at like 10plus. after that had to chiong off to simei to prepare for flea market. wanted to buy some snacks for the people staying over so went to sheng siong to buy. found out i was out of money at the cashier and my nets was also out of money, so borrowed money from nick ( thank God he was there. ) chionged to simei after that.

Alot of things were happening at simei but i kinda forgot cos my brain wasnt working and i was already super exhausted from rushing issues research on thursday night/friday morning. so i kinda walked around aimlessly and dozed off quite a few times. until i couldnt take it anymore and went to lie down on a sofa and fell asleep there. and slept a few hours. i think it was only around 3 hours, if im correct. but i think i miscounted.

Couldnt wake up this morning. in fact barely anyone could. i rmb kayong trying to wake us up then later disappearing ( i think he was sleeping next to me after trying to wake us up. haha! but i was too tired to turn my head to see who was it. ) and everyone just continued sleeping and sleeping. the flea market was okay i guess. the games were all nicely done up but i think the lack of people actually killed off our enthusiasm. thank God for the volunteers to help us in the morning. :D if not i think we'll ( actually just me. i'm sure the others are much stronger. XD ) will die cos we'll be zombielike. i was quite happy at that time. after that around the afternoon time the fatigue started kicking in and once again i couldnt sit still and my brain kinda died. all i can rmb was naiimah gave me an orange daisy! :D
and she played wwith my camera. ahhaha...

When the flea market was over and everything was packed up ( tried to force myself to help, but i couldnt stay in one spot for long again) we went upstairs. WT's friends surprised her at the centre and celebrated her bday. after that we took photo as a NP students thing but most of the volunteers were already gone :(
After that went for debrief but mostly was settling accounts and dozing off. all i can rmb of the debrief was that i slept until super shiok and alot of people also. ahahah! and the next thing i knew was that it was dark and most people had left.

went changi airport to send kayong off and celebrate wt's bday. surprised her there i guess. :D had dinner there too at popeye's! :D kinda zombied my way home after that. fell asleep everywhere i couuld. HAHAHA!

eventful day. XD

& to a really good friend i really cherish.

I'm sorry for being so bossy towards you. i should have realised you were sick and shldnt have forced you to do so many things. should have, as a "leader", shown more compassion and understanding towards my friends. and i have failed to be a caring and compassionate leader. And as a friend, i have failed you terribly. please forgive me.
I guess i am really very very stressed with whats coming soon. i do not want this event to be something that people just go and leave without anything significant. i really pray and hope that it will be an event that changes people and their lives for the better. and seeing the way it is now, with lack of support and proper planning due to my disorganised habits, i dont really think that it can be that way. the lack of attendance is really a very bad blow to me and i am really trying to pray very hard that a miracle might happen. but how can i concentrate on prayer if i already got not enough time for it? work and stress all has been killing into my qt times and this really sometimes makes me panic at the thought of failing and letting down our leaders and fellow friends, and most of all, God.
I know and still remember what you shared with me last time. Yes i understand, and i shall not change you. but all i need and am asking for is that more people will come for this event. i want to see our friends grow and bond. and this event will have lost its main meaning if not many people come for it. I know your beliefs, and your stands, but i'm not asking you to do what other people might do, but just invite them to this event and somehow im sure someone else will speak to them. You do not have too if you dont want to. :D
Maybe its not your working style, but i do hope you understand that opportunities like these do not come everyday. and when they do come, we should make full use of them. Though it doesnt coincide with your working style, but God makes use of everyone and usues them in ways we will constantly find surprising and unexpected. through these event, who knows what might truly happen?
We do not know God's plan for us, or other people, but we should constantly just pray and try our best and pray even more that it is in God's plan and perfect timing.

2008-12-03T09:30:00.000-08:00

Im tired.

I need a break.

2008-11-29T10:30:00.000-08:00

Sigh.

My walks really affected

too tired to do anything

too tired to want to do anything

too tired to be bothered about anything

I wish feelings would just die. then at least can like not feel anything or smth liddat. then can concentrate on work and wont be feeling stressed or tired or something.

Tomorrow i'm gona play tennis like crazy whenever i can find time. gotta destress and get many things off my mind.

And i'm super tempted to give up growing taller and just chiong exercise. oh well. year 2 is coming soon....

sometimes i wonder how life on the other side would be.

2008-11-25T06:36:00.000-08:00

hahhaa. after today, i realised i gotta blog abt the birthday celebrations i had.

Firstly, friday, 21st Nov. I went to school late for LMS. Woke up at like 9.40 and was still too lazy to get up from bed. Chionged out of the house and reached the classroom at like 10.15, praying hard all the way. And i ran like crazy all the way to the classroom. entered it panting like crazy and apologised to the teacher. Oh. btw. Half the class wasnt there / was there.

Oh and after that lesson (which was surprisingly okay) i went to canteen 2. proposed to have lunch with the LMS class but in the end duno where some people disappear to
:(

WT said she needed to go print smth then meet us later. so i was like quite sad cos cannot eat as an LMS class. :( AND SHE CANT EAT WITH US TO! :(

so okay lor. go canteen 2. at least almost 7 people la. haha. then ate yong tau foo for like the first time in duno how many years (many many many). not bad la. haha! then halfway eating i forgot who said hi to kayyong. then i turned and saw kayong walking to our table. then said hi and all. then saw behind him was WT and gabby and some others ( cant rmb. was talking to ky) Then i called out to WT and gabby and they like nvr hear. so i was like okay lor. maybe they didnt see us. and didnt hear me. so i continued eating. then was talking to some of my class people who also same class as me in LMS and then was talking halfway when WT and gabby and the others SUDDENLY APPEARED from behind me, SINGING A BIRTHDAY SONG AND HOLDING A BIRTHDAY CAKE! okay. heres what happened- i ate and gasped at the same time.

The result? choked. coughed. HAHAHAHA! THEN GAVE A BLANK LOOK.

Okay. i was super happy and then i also duno how to respond. so i just sat there.

Then gabby asked me to take the candle out with my mouth. haha! and i did. then thats all i rmbed. cant really rmb what i did after that. but apparently i was stupid and kinda ignored them. :(

I REALLY DUNO HOW TO REACT LOR!! SUPER SHY AND DUNO WHAT TO DO ALSO. and so i stupidly did nothing. then made everyone angry. :(

SORRY GUYS AND GIRLS!! I REALLY DUNO WHAT TO DO! sigh. if i could go back in time i'll hug u all. :(

I hope you all forgive me. :(

Today i was feeling a bit ill throughout the whole day. i think i have flu or smth. and while typing this i sneezed 5 times continuously. someone really misses me XD HAHA! okay bad joke. so after OB lectures i was feeling super lethargic and sleepy and tired and i kinda slept at the classroom door while waiting for the teacher to come to open the door. then entered the classroom and was reading articles online. For OB e learning we gotta come up with some presentation about a OB topic in a chapter about participation. So the first group to present went up. then connecting and all. now while im typing i kinda am wondering why i didnt suspect anything cos there was quite a long time when nothing was happening.

but then i started sneezing and sneezing then took out a tissue to blow my nose with and while i was blowing my nose ( tissue still covering my nose ) ANGE suddenly almost shouted "KENN can you pay attention??!!!" then i was like okay. then i suddenly noticed naiimah walking in the classroom with a cake ( actually more of a huge cookie- famous amos) with candles on it. TOTALLY SHOCKED ME LA! HAHAHAA! sumore i was in a awkward position. the tissue was still covering my nose and i was blowing my nose. and then they put it infront of me and took photo. on the cake was written " HAPPY BIRTHDAY PRINE OF TENNIS" and yea. i didnt misspell it hor. it was PRINE of tennis. HAHAHAH! =D but nvm. AHHAHA! and btw for like a few seconds when i noticed naiimah i was like wondering whose birthday it was. HAHA! and i felt so regretful for falling sick today. :(

So thats like. 2 heart attacks within 5 days. HAHA! THANKS AGAIN EVERYONE! REALLY! THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!! =D and watch out on yr birthdays. XD HAHA!

2008-11-21T08:22:00.000-08:00

Thanks everyone for your birthday wishes! =D

All of you have really brightened up my day. hahah! :D

THANKS THANKS THANKS ALOT! =D

I had a really lousy start. woke up at like 9.45 and had a great shock. class started at 10 today. haha! so i choinged down to school and reached at like 10.15. praise God! THANK YOU GOD! =D

Felt extremely tired the entire day though. was up late last night watching videos on youtube ( all about christianity. :D ) and was doing a bit of hw ( etest. sigh.)

And now i gotta chiong portfolio. HAHA! oh welll.... :(

THANKS AGAIN EVERYONE! =D

2008-11-20T07:03:00.000-08:00

i think i overexerted myself in tennis today.

Felt super wear after that.

And hungry too.

But tennis was fun

I was laughing like crap when a girl from the school team hit a tennis ball and it came flying and hit me in the *cough*

Okay fine it missed by like a few cm. but i was on the floor laughing and rolling anyway.

Worse is, after that, i hit a ball and it flew and hit her at her right thigh. ouch.

I was like super pai seh la. i bet she thought i hit it on purpose for revenge. haha! the other girl she was playing tennis with was like "WA EH REVENGE AH!" haha!

luckily shes alright =D

okay that was one super funny incident that happened in tennis. my form was super off. gotta keep practicing. saw the school team players playing today. super nice and consistent shots. and the girls hit way better than the guys in tennis club. yikes. thats scary.

Actually the school team tennis players came to training today to carry out tryouts for the girls, cos they lack girl players. but still even the guys in tennis club was showing off and trying to play their best (but somehow everyone could not. duno why. me included). personally, i was hoping to get talent spotted. haha! im sure many other guys were trying to as well :D

But oh well. im too lousy. haha! will train harder, whenever i have time.

HEADACHE! and i still gotta do hw. :(

2008-11-16T04:47:00.000-08:00

I actually wanted to write a article on Christianity today

Though i do have urges to write theology articles, i dont think i should be writing them for now. Firstly i still have much to learn. its only recently that i've taken up apologetics, and i know only so little of Christianity. Mostly, im afraid of writing something which is questionable and i do not want my fellow Christian friends to stumble because of them.

Also, i dare not say that my walk has been great lately. i've been missing QTs and i havent exactly been living the life that glorifies Christ.

I just pray that i will take up the challenge to write them soon, with guidiance from the Holy Spirit.

2008-11-11T07:06:00.000-08:00

I learnt many things today during BBB
(Bad Boys Band yoz.)

Its basically a group of boys studying the characters known for doing bad things in the bible.

So today we learnt about the biggest bad boy of all. =D

Quite interesting, i would say, though i was abit sleepy throughout the entire thing as usual. Too tired. schools too draining. hahah! but i managed to learn alot still anyway. Learnt about the way Satan does things. His methods, strategies, and how we can guard ourselves against them.

So now, i'll be much more careful. =D

I've made an important decision to guard my heart and mind and actions. So yea i guess i'll be careful! =D

And i pray that i will keep these values and convictions throughtout my life.

& i'm going to do lessons and peps with a little more passion now. =D

2008-11-09T06:54:00.000-08:00

I think, God is trying to speak to me and im trying my best to figure out what.

Based on circumstances, certain things have hit me over the past few days.

1st thing-

The word Shalom.

Last sunday- Gabby asked me about a word which was used in the church she visited to greet one another. shelog or something. Thought for a while, then asked if the word was SHALOM, a word, which i dont ever recall hearing or knowing the meaning to ( God spoke to me ). Its like a word i never heard of before or read of before, but I was quite sure it was the word Shalom. Unexplainable. Searched for the word on wiki, and true enough it was a greeting which meant "peace" or something like that.

Another day during the week- Eze's group name was Shalom. Peace.

Friday night- Speaker Hensen mentioned about the peace from God- Shalom. Talked about the kingdom of God and all, and the blessings which come from Him, but talked mostly about Shalom. Peace.

Sunday- Forgot who mentioned Shalom. probably was my pastor. but my memory seems a bit fuzzy for today. It was either mentioned by my pastor or my cell group lesson by one of the leaders. Anyway i think it was the sermon by my pastor. one of the gifts from the Holy Spirit- Shalom.

2nd thing-

A few days ago- Marcus, from my cell group, asked me if i could teach in his place today as he had some rugby thing. i agreed. lesson was on 1 peter 1 - 12. didnt start preparing cos i didnt have the notes.

After a few days- My faith got tested quite a bit through the week. not once, but a few times. cant mention them all.
Felt rather frustrated with how some things turned out to be. Frustrated how some things happened. shared with a sister in Christ about it.

Yesterday- had to prepare for the lesson for today. topic- inheritance. to perservere thru hardships with the end in mind. with many encouragements and all.

Today- taught in lesson today most of the things i've planned, and talked about God's promises and our inheritance from Him, and the blessings we have and how we should be thankful for everything and really how we are blessed with many things but sometimes we just take everything for granted and forget about God. Talked alot about perserverence and trusting in Him in everything and just focus on the eternal. That we should not conform to the ways of the world. and in our sufferings, really, just rejoice. When people persecute you, laugh. Just focus on the eternal. Mentioned about Job- one of my fave verses-
Naked i came from my mother's womb,
Naked i shall depart.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
May the name of the Lord be praised.

Today- a sister in Christ mentioned about Christ always being there for us, and that Christ's power is enough for all of us. And run away from the evils in the world and hold on to and trust in Christ and focus on His promises- (our inheritance/the eternal) And that, in our sufferings, God is most glorified when we are able to still be satisfied with what Christ has blessed us in abundance.

If anyone has been wondering why i have blogged all these, its actually just to organise my thoughts. Its not for my own benefit, but for others' benefit. If it offends you, you can always not read it.

2008-11-08T08:09:00.000-08:00

Thankful, i'm thankful of many things, for many things, for many people, for many places, for many situations.
Thankful for everything. :D

Thank You, God.

And each day i just find more things to thank You about.

Haha! i slept almost the whole day today. to make up for the lack of sleep for the past few days :D i had this really wierd dream which seemed so real. woke up and started thinking whether it really happened or not. hahahah! it seemed really really real, and it was super random, and yet it was super detailed. and it was a pleasent dream that had me woke up smiling and laughing. hahahaha! its a great relief to all the stress so far. XD and thank God for it! =D

But i cant really say i wish the dream was real. haha. though it was nice and all, but then again i think its super impossible and i dont think such wierd things will ever happen to me. hahaha! its a great laugh. really. somehow i have this feeling that i was laughing while i was sleeping. hahahaha! but its quite a funny dream. too bad i cant really put it into words if not i think i'll describe it here. and i cant exactly rmb most of it. hahahah!

2008-10-29T09:09:00.000-07:00

Day 1 of apologetics study.

My mum sent me to sch today.. so i reached super early.. like 7.30 like that. Really, i went to school early for the sole purpose of studying apologetics. A fellow christian friend of mine mentioned that i have to know both sides of the story to be an apologetic. cos basically i gotta attack other religons and defend my own. Sadly, im not the attacking kind. so i think i'm gona just learn to defend. :) but i will learn about other religons to understand and so that i can have a balanced view, and not just one sided.

Okay. i found 2 website while studying today. one was about christian apologetics, supporting christianity, and another was an atheist website. i read the website about christian apologetics first. now please take in mind that i read both website's claims and statements with an open mind. really. i did. (i was skeptical about the apologetics website too. in case they got different teachings ) so yea.

The christian website gave balanced claims. they gave logical arguements with strong points and backed up pretty well. evidence was given and logically seemed correct.

Now even though it was an atheist website, i always thought that at least there would be some complex reasonings and arguements against religon and such. there must be some wierd reasons that seems logical to not believe in God, right? well. it was a disappointment. seriously, i tried as much as i could to read with an open mind, but somehow their points were so weak that half the time i was wondering what was the link. and like almost all the time i could rebutt and explain the claims that they were making. in fact most of the websites' articles and such were aimed at christianity. and they were all so childish and immature and just kept condemning without any logical reasonings or explanations.

These things really make me think. are these people just trying to act cool in saying that they dont need or dont believe in God?

They even had ceremonies and parties to celebrate not having God in their lives?
Funny, how they are so... immature.

Okay. lets hope that "the other side of the story" is not all dumb. maybe its just that branch. hahahah!

Apologetics study shall resume soon. I think i'll have to read the bible alot now to put the wisdom that God gave me to good use.. :)

2008-10-28T10:01:00.000-07:00

hahaha.. i've made a really important decision today.....

I wanna be a Christian apologetic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

go search wiki if you dont know what it means.. :)
Oh nevermind. heres the link..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_apologetics#Defense_of_miracles

:)

Okay.. i was inspired by this website..

http://y-jesus.com/jesuscomplex_1.php

Found it while searching for chords to christian songs.. :)

It inspired me to become an apologetic..

But the journey is long and troublesome.. and i gotta really really really study like crazy.. and apart from my course too.... oh well... hopefully i can really become one.. :)

2008-10-26T12:28:00.000-07:00

Played soccer after church today. Ocean vs anfield + a few ocean people. anfielders won by a bit i think. hahaha... oh well.. :) i played for ocean today. hahaha.. as the gk. couldnt run much today due to the muddy field and the not-wearing-of-field-boots. thus everytime i tried changing direction or sprinting i found myself losing balance.

hmm. i decided, out of boredom, to check the extent of the aches and injuries i have. hahaha!

Right ankle - cant bend it. hurts like crap. gotta keep it still and rested on the groung.

Right knee- my knee problem got a bit worse. i think. twisted my knee along with my ankle when someone slided me. ouch. hopfully my knee will heal! :)

Left arm- cannot grab or press against objects or it will ache alot.

Right wrist- once again, the impact of blocking balls while a gk is making my wrist hurt. thats why i was most of the time deflecting rather than catching. Gotta get gloves one day. XD

Oh yea. i didnt really play much on the field. but i think i played well (for my standards XD) when we played street soccer after that. hahaha.. i somehow found that my leg could reach the ball most of the time. XD hahaha.. oh well...=D

2008-10-25T10:53:00.000-07:00

The following is a prayer.

Dear Lord,

Thank You. Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You and forever Thank You.
You have shown me that being patient was a good choice.
You have taught me many things in my life.
You have helped me in more ways i can count.
You have saved me in countless times that i dont deserve.
You have guided me to Your will each step i take

There is no word worthy to describe You.

Saviour King, You saved me once again.

I pray that i will always and forevermore walk in accordance to Your will.
I pray that i will not do anything that does not reflect Your glory.
I pray that Your kingdom will reign in my life.

But Lord, i pray as an intercessor. Lord, You know why i come to You to pray each time. And if it is along with Your will, i pray about *. And i will pray each night about it. I pray that it is not worldy desire, i pray that it is in accordance to Your will. cos i know Your will is definately the best. Though things do not seem to be going that way, i pray that You will take over it. Lord, please if it be possible. But let it be not something out of my own selfish desire but something that You want me to.

Forgive me of all that I've done.

Though i never do deserve anything
But You still rescued me and delivered me from sin and death.
Help me to remember this and have the same mercy and compassion for everyone.

Thank You, Lord for today.
Thank You, Lord, for the really strong sister in Christ. Thank You that she was very brave and cleared things up. I pray that i will grow spiritually with her and that Your will be done.
Thank You, Lord, for flooding my timetable for the day to the brim. That way, i can enjoy my rest better and im happier and more satisfied with my day.

I leave everything to You, Lord. Take me and use me.
I pray that everything i do would always be Your plan.

And i pray all these in the name of Jesus.
Amen.

2008-10-24T09:52:00.000-07:00

Naked i was born from my mother's womb, naked i shall depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. May the name of the Lord be praised.

(Hopefully) Everything i do is for God's glory. Nothing for me. So if i did something that scares or negatively affects a fellow christian friend of mine, how can i continue doing that? :)

How can i bring harm to a fellow brother or sister in Christ?

All i want is for my brother or sister in Christ to be happy. And as long as he/she is happy then i too am happy for them.

I guess thats one of the reasons why my locus of control is so external.
I think i'm too accepting of situations and circumstances.

I refuse to do anything that hurts or harms a brother or sister in Christ. I'd rather myself suffer for the rest of my life on earth.

So i guess the pain starts now.
Help me, Lord. Broken i am on my knees.

2008-10-22T09:47:00.000-07:00

I dont get it. i really dont. why does all bad things have to happen to me? why do i get all the shit? why, in simple Singaporean slang and terms, do i always have to be the one who suay suay kena all the wierd situations and problems and have the most complicated of everything? why??? why is it always me. why is it me with such problems? why do i always have to be the one who is affected my all the negative things that has happened? why me? why not others? sigh....
Why must it be me that she is scared of?
Why must it be me that is so afraid of doing anything in case the situation gets worse?

2008-10-20T07:55:00.000-07:00

I just found out the meaning for my name. hahaha!

Apparently it means " He teach". hahah! in Icelandic or something. hahaha!! i think so.. oh well.. XD

I googled my name and voila! i found this link to an online bible. it brought me to the Gospel of Luke. and when i read both the english and icelandic versions i kinda guessed that "Hann" probably means He or Him and "Kenn" probably means teach. i think. hahaha! Its kinda interesting. and shocking. cos i dont think my parents know this meaning. ( my name is actually CHINESE! but it makes no sense. hahaha) oh well.. :) but anyway its really interesting and i think it can be biblical. XD cos well. God teaches, right? hahaha! He is the great Teacher! :)

A small part of the song "Lean on You" by Hillsong Kids. :) the lyrics are super meaningful!!!!!

Don't look down at songs meant for child Christians. Sometimes i really feel that being a child Christian is really the best. A child's focus would be on loving God and worshipping God and devoting everything to God, and would not worry about politics and conflicts around them. They would not understand arguements about christianity and all, nor do they have much "in depth" knowledge. Yet, they worship God with all that they are, bringing christianity to its SIMPLEST.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul, strength. :)

And they do not concern themselves with anything else but pleasing God.

This is the bridge and chorus. :)

Here's my heart.
I give it to You.
Desperate for Your Holy Spirit.
Cos i wanna see Your kingdom reign in my life.

Oh Lord,
Anything You want from me,
I'll give it.
Yea I'll give it.
Cos i know i'll find all i need in You.

And Oh Lord
Anything You ask of me
I'll do it.
Yea i'll do it
When i fall i'm caught in the grace of You
Lord, i will lean on You.

2008-10-19T08:44:00.000-07:00

hahaha.. okay. today i celebrated my grandmother's birthday.

met my cousins and aunts and uncles all whom i havent seen for a super long time. hahaha..

well okay i meet my maternal side cousins almost every week. hahaha.. but still... XD

the funny part about the day was that we played mahjong. okay im super new at mahjong and i always duno what to shout or say or do. hahahaha. i just rarely play it. XD okay heres the funny part.

(Dont worry. we werent gambling. it was for fun. haha! no money.)

I won all the games. XD

We played 5 games total. for the first 2 games i "zi muo" and won. after that my cousins all got a bit errr... competitive and refused to believe that someone that is super lousy can win twice in a row already. must be just luck. then when i won the third time in a row they started to try to not let me game, but still i won 2 more times. hahaha! XD it was super funny. cos i kept asking them what to do like after err.. combos or something. hahah! see im still super new. XD its all luck btw. hahaha.. it just happened 5 times. XD but it was super funny. hahahah. im like super newbie in mahjong. hahahaha oh well :)

2008-10-15T08:29:00.000-07:00

We all just need to take a step forward

Dont be happy in your comfort zone. Be Bold. STEP OUT.

Come on! We'll never know unless we try.

Make mistakes! then youll learn in a much more fun way.

Do more things so that you can remember and laugh about it in the future! =D

Really, people. Our laziness has gotten the best of us. We need to get rid of this enemy called laziness. Try new things! Be enthusiastic! Each one of your actions and behaviours will affect everyone! Lets affect each other in a POSITIVE way so that we can try our best to make this world a much nicer place! :)

2008-10-13T08:46:00.000-07:00

This is how i feel.

God pokes me.
I flinch and get tickled.
I laugh.
God laughs

:)

Picture two people playing. yea. thats how i feel. hahaha!
Lord please remind me that You're in charge. That Your will is the most important. Lord, help me to accept that somethings will never become part of my life. That im not even meant to stay on a level as friends with some people. Lord please get rid of this aching in my heart. The one that hurts me everyday and everytime i think about such things, such as now. Lord only You can save me from where i am now. Only You can save me from my own emotions. Only You can save me from my own actions. Save me, Lord. But thank You for all You've done for me. Thank You for giving me strong feelings. But Lord i pray that somehow this will fade overtime as i really think that im going further, rather than nearer. and that is a great stab to my heart. Please Lord. Still, above all, I surrender to Your will.
My life is interesting. hahaha!

Thank You, God! =)

2008-10-11T08:58:00.000-07:00

I feel it. The urge to do well in something.
Its building up in me. I guess everyone does have to specialise in something.
I think i'm gona really practice hard for a passion of mine.
Tennis.

I shall take it seriously now. Im gona train and really just practice until i master it. Starting with fine tuning all the basics first. then service. then fine tune volleys. then learn how to smash (my smashes are disasterous). then i'm gona work on spins.
My style of playing shall be using well aimed shots to score. I'll use that until i master the spins and from then on i'll use both aimed shots and heavy spins to score. Lets hope that i keep to this plan.

Though i havent exactly watched Prince of Tennis until the part where they mentioned the pinaccle of perfection, but i think its abit self explanatory. i shall work towards perfecting my aim and shots. =D

TENNIS!

Lets hope that it wont affect my studies.

2008-10-11T08:29:00.000-07:00

What can i do but pray?

Everything in life is unpredictable.

Everything seems to work against me

The world seems unfair

Situations only get worse

I only get more and more exhausted

My heart breaks each day

Nothing brings me closer

Only further

I try yet dont succeed

And each time it gets worse
Lord. How long more will this last? Please Lord. i dont want this anymore. I cant take it anymore. Its not working out. Its not even improving. I cant stand it. why cant i just change and continue walking forward? Why cant I just leave the matter behind and just live on with my life? Why must i always hope for what is impossible? why must i pray for things that arent according to Your will?

Really, what can i do but pray? :)

2008-10-09T10:33:00.001-07:00

1) the person who tagged:
sean

2) your relationship with him/her is:
classmates 

3)your 5 impressions on him/her:
errr.... hes tanned. Hahaha! And taller than me.. and can sign SUPER well. =D

4)the most memorable thing that he/she had done for you:
oooo.. errrr... i’ll say the camps that we’ve gone for together. Haha!

5) the most memorable thing that he/she had said to you:
err... screw you? XD

6) if he/she becomes your lover, you will:
eeeeee

7) if he/she becomes your lover, the thing he/she has to improve on will be:
eerr..... eeeeeee

8) if he/she becomes your enemy, you will:
i duno.. not talk to him? XD

9) if he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
err.. i duno.. XD

10) the most desired thing you want to for him/her now is:
errr... to find a girl XD

11) your overall impression of him/her is:
good friend 

12) how you think ppl ard you will feel abt you?
err.. i duno? Haha! Maybe short and noisy..

13) the characteristic you love about yourself is:
i hate myself. Haha!

14) on the contrary, the characteristic you hate of yourself is:
everything? XD

15) the most ideal person you want to be is:
someone really nice and kind and caring and honest and pure and devoted and loving and joyful and so on

16) for ppl who cares and likes you, say smth to them:
 thanks! Hahaha!

17) pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to know how they feel about you:
anybody that actually bothers to read! XD hahah!
1. Fiona
2. Weiting
3. Kay Yong
4. Jiawen
5. Gabrielle
6. Amanda
7. Naiimah
8. Deborah
9. Marianne
10. Jian Yang

18) who is no. 6 having a relationship with:
haha... no one. XD i think...

19) is no. 9 male or female?
FEMALE! =D

20) if no. 7 and 10 are tgt, will it be a good thing?
I’ll laugh like crazy. Hahaha! THEYRE GOOD FRIENDS!!!

21) what is no. 2 studying abt?
same lor.. PCS =D

22) when is the last time you had a chat with no. 3?
like.. now. Haha!

23) what kind of music band does no. 8 like?
i have no idea. I think jap songs. (forgive me if im wrong XD) haha!

24) does no.1 have any siblings?
i think so. Haha!

25) will you woo no.3?
hahhahaha. YES! XD

26) how abt no. 7?
hahahah! WE”RE CLASSMATES AND GOOD FRIENDS!! XD

27) is no. 4 single?
I duno.. haha! But i doubt it. XD

28) what is the surname of no. 5?
CHIENG! =D

29) what is the hobby of no.4?
errr.. i duno XD hahah! She likes to.... err... talk? XD or have fun? Hahah!

30) does no. 5 and no.9 get along well?
HAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA! SERIOUSLY?!!! They don’t know each other well so i doubt it XDDDDD

31) where is no. 2 studying at?
NP!

32) talk something casual abt no.1:
hahaha! Err.. shes REALLY COOL! =D

33) have you tried developing feelings for no. 8?
huh? Hahaha! Friends  and gaming buddies. Haha!

34) where does no. 9 live at?
CCK i think. Haha! Around there...

35) what colour does no. 3 like?
I DUNNO! I think its either black and white or PINK! XD hahaha! Or orange....

36) are no. 5 and no. 1 best friends?
YES!! HAHAHA! Okay i duno about BEST but they are good friends  ahhaa!

37) does no. 1 has any pets?
i duno.. haha!

38) is no. 7 the sexiest person in the world?
HAHAHAHA!!! Hmmm.. maybe one of them? XD GO NAIIMAH! =D

39) what is no. 10 doing now?
chatting with me. Hahah! But i think hes multitasking. Haha!

2008-10-08T08:52:00.000-07:00

God has a sense of humour!!! :)

Hahaha!

And everything just makes my life more interesting.

Hahahaha! I just gotta learn to appreciate His humour while the situations are happening.

Takes me a while to laugh abt it... :)

But now i know, and i'll learn

HAHAHAHA!

Thank You, God.
Thank You for my friends who are able to cheer me up!
And thank You for answering my prayers in a unique way :)
I really appreciate all that You have done for me
And each day i just love You more and more! :)

This camp i just attended is sure interesting...

2008-10-04T10:31:00.000-07:00

Praise God!!!!

I found the JOY!!!!

AND GOD REIGNITED MY PASSION!! =D

YESS!!! AFTER SO LONG OF DRYNESS!! HAHAHAHA!!!!
thanks to my late uncle, who inspired me. :) Even after his reunion with the Lord, his letters and sermons continue to inspire :) thanks uncle!
Thank you, God, for granting back this passion for Your Name. that once again i can feel the hunger and motivation for Your Glory to be seen throughout the earth. and that i now live with new convictions in life :)

Everything for God's Glory. Everything for His kingdom. Everything for Him.

Cos God deserves much much more :)

Praise the Lord

2008-10-04T07:08:00.000-07:00

Read this story and think. :) will post my interpretation of it someday. but everyone has their own interpretations :)

A man was lying on his bed in his room. He thought to himself and said "I think I shall get myself a glass of water." After saying that, he got up from his bed and walked towards the kitchen. However, the door to his room was closed. He turned the handle to open the door and found that the door was stuck. He tried to open it for a while more, then gave up and went back to lie on his bed.

Another man was lying on his bed in his room. He felt parched and decided too to get a glass of water. He got up from his bed and proceeded kitchen, only to find that the door to his room was closed. He turned the handle to open the door and found that the door was stuck. He tried harder and harder to open the door, struggled with the door, and after a long while finally managed to get the door open. As he walked towards his kitchen, however, a chair was blocking his path. He climbed over the chair only to find that there lay his glass vase, shattered on the floor. Using the chair as a bridge, he avoided the glass debri and went into his kitchen, only to find that there was no more potable water. He filled the kettle with water and boiled it, and waited for about 5 minutes before pouring it into a mug, only to find that it is too hot to drink. He then had to wait another 5 minutes to let the water cool before drinking it.

:)

God Bless!

2008-09-30T09:49:00.000-07:00

hahhaa.. i've never dozed off so many times in a day before, i think.

I kept falling asleep during HI 5 today. XD hahah.. not on purpose... even though it was quite interesting, but some parts abit draggy. nvm... yikes.. feel so guilty for falling asleep... sighhh

AND i got this wierd problem, that taking notes will help me fall asleep faster. duno why. ( i suspect bcos of geog. XD) most people can stay awake by writing things down and such, but i cant. If i wrote notes, not only will i fall asleep faster, i'll write wierd random stuff not related to the talk at all. and i can doze off halfway while writing a word. haha! but i find it abit hilarious.

Oh well... I FEEL SO GUILTY AGAIN FOR FALLING ASLEEP AND NOT REPLYING HANDSOME!!! sighh... i went to lay on my bed, planning to rest my eyes for 1 min only, and next thing i knew, it was morning. :( NOO!!!! HANDSOME PLEASE DUN ANGRY!! :( SORRY!! REALLY SORRY LA!! and i read yr message later and i felt even more guilty :(

oh well.. went to settlers cafe with the PEP group. quite fun, i'll say. =D hahaa! and the games were abit competitive. =D first time at settlers. hahaha! yes im slow. haha! played saboteur and cranium. saboteur was really fun, esp when yr the saboteur then must think whos yr teammates. hahah! and and the psych people used "psychology" to think and reason out who is a saboteur and who is a miner. hahaha! okay.. actually its just pure reasoning. but oh well! =D just wanted to scare them abit. hahah! but apparently the saboteurs kept winning. XD

Came back drenched and tired. hahah! oh well... super heavy eyelids.. sigh... tmr is my rest day! planning to sleep till super late. hahhaa.. and HIATUS DAY! i'll try to spend a long time praying and reading God's word. :) maybe like half the day? hahaha.. i think i'll need it.

Oh well.. gona stop here. =D super tired liaooo

2008-09-28T09:45:00.000-07:00

hahah.. hey all! i just came back from ANOTHER camp! hi club camp!! AHHAHAHAH!! SUPER FUN!!! and the lessons were quite fun also. but yea. 3 hours per session is a bit too much. hahaha! but i managed to learn many more signs and improve my sign language by ALOT! ( i could only sign a few words before the camp )

Oh for those who doesnt know what is HI club

HI stands for Hearing Impaired. so its the Hearing Impaired Club. hahah! and its a cca whereby we learn sign languages and get tested and all so that we are able to communicate with the hearing impaired. oh and we also sign and dance songs using sign language. and its actually SUPER FUN and SUPER NICE!!! much nicer than just ordinary dancing, in my opinion. cos the actions are very emotive and meaningful! hahaha! and cute too! XD

Sounds like an advertisement. hahaha! oh well.. im super tired. tmr got delegates thingy. and WTAG outing. XD hahaha! i cant wait to see the WTAG!! haahaha! AFTER SO LONG LIAO THEN MEET?!!! FINALY WE MEET SIA!! MISS U ALL LIKE SIAO! XD

hahaha.. and now i REALLY REALLY GOTTA SLEEP OR DIE OF EXHAUSTION! HHAHAHAH

2008-09-17T14:19:00.000-07:00

HEY ALL! IM BACK!

missed me? XD

and i had a great trip.
WOOOHOOO!!! super fun la.. everyday was super eventful and fulfilling and touching.
So yea we went SOUTH CHINA. im not allowed to post details so im just gona say that we all had fun :) and we miss SOUTH CHINA! =D

I wish i could share my experiences. really..... theres so many things i can say and so much to write about but then we're err... bounded by that piece of paper. hahahah! so err...

IM SUPER TIRED LA! I HAVENT BEEN SLEEPING MUCH FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS (at most, only like 7 hours of sleep in 3 days...) but somehow i am blogging at 5.23am right after i return home from the airport. hahahah!

and already i miss my YEP friends :(

MEET UP SOON OKAY??!! =D

2008-09-02T11:46:00.000-07:00

Soo.. once again i'll be away. haha! well this time is for the youth expedition project. i really hope it'll be a great trip to china!

And we have so much luggage! im bringing a huge backpack and a small haversack. And in addition to those 2 i have to carry another huge bag containing clothes for the people there, courtesy of MGS. thanks la. we gotta carry it ourselves. XD well i'll give those girls effort for packing. they squeezed the clothes into it using the "super-pack" style- rolling the clothes up. hahaha! and im using the same method to pack my backpack. oh well... still, not many people know this method of folding, i think. hahah!

ahhH!!! i gotta bring my laptop there :( im super scared it goes missing or lost or spoiled la... sian.. oh well.. when the trip begins i'll be super busy and i gotta think about the video that must be finished during the 2 weeks there. i dont think theres enough time as i still need to take photos and choose which ones to use for the video, and the video must show events of all or most of the programs... hahaha.. busy busy busy!

DONT MISS ME OKAY???!!! =D (then i wont have to buy souvenirs!!! XD)

Hahaa... well up to you all.

Seriously, part of me thinks i wont come back from the trip. hahaha! earthquake and all.. but thats just the random thoughts that are pricking me.. i cant wait to go! i'm super sure it'll be fun =D and if somehow something errr... happens, it would most likely be because of too much laughter then not enuff air in the mountains then pass out. hahaha! im gona get 6 pecs from laughing within these 2 weeks. seriously. hahah!

flights at around 3am tmr morning. and i gotta be at the airport by 12midnight. hahaha! i'll probably go earlier.. oh welll..

ARHGHH!!! I JUST NOTICED!! I HAVENT GIVEN MY PLEDGE TO THE CHURCH YET!!!

sian.. aug ended liao.. >.< im late! hahaha... gona be like half a month late.. sigh..

well.. today was quite fun. had YEP meeting and we sang and learnt songs. hahah! theres one song that jonathan wrote and its now our theme song... super nice la.. hahaha and he can sing too! not bad. hahhahaa! so we got a super nice original theme song for our trip.. yay!! hahaha.. and i showed my video. XD oh well... so happy to finish the first video la.. hahaha.. super tired now from chionging it..

After that i had to chiong for students night meeting. met amanda (neo) and her friends on the bus. hahah! i found out they were in soccer cca XD WHOA! no wonder they played quite well that day when they crashed our soccer S&W. hhhahaha! i was quite impressed. anyway.. students night meeting started late so that everyone can eat. hahahah! so we finished eating at 8 and started with sharing. which kinda went all the way until 10. it was quite a nice experience, sharing with the people present.... hopefully they felt it meaningful and it would have bonded us closer :) we need to be bonded to work with each other to make students night even better! =D hahaha.. we had popcorn prayer after that. and we ended at 10.30 liddat cos the caretaker wanted to lock the place up. hahhaha! whoa.. we got carried away.. but it was fun! =D im so happy to see everyone coming together to pray and all.. really shows how much we all have grown and matured since a long time ago! =D

oh well.. gotta go china tmr! hahaha! need lots of sleep! XD

BYE ALL!! WONT BE BACK TILL THE 18TH SEPTEMBER 2008! HHHAHAHAHAH!
im so gonna miss Singapore. hahahaa! :(

and their clean toilets. XD

2008-08-27T07:13:00.000-07:00

okay guys. im leaving soon.. for 3 days. sumore on sat i got injections AGAIN!

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SOOOO MANY INJECTIONS THIS YEAR LIAO!!!

SIAN!!! oh well.. Typhoid, tetanus, blood test, hep B vaccination 1st and 2nd booster (3rd one coming soon *groan*) AND THERES FLU JAB ON SATURDAY!

And after that theres bbq =D

And after that i gotta chiong a video to be completed by next YEP meeting =D

And students night prayer bonding session on sunday after cell lunch

And monday videomaking

I think theres a YEP meeting on tuesday... cant rmb >.<

WEDNESDAY I"LL BE FLYING OFF!!! ( at midnight like that i have to be at the airport XD)

TRUST me people. u wont wanna welcome us back from china. we're arriving at sg at 18th sept at 2am... hahaha! so if anyone wanna support us its gotta be seeing off... XD
(Not me la... who would wanna see me off? actually im hoping for *someone* *cough* but no way that person will go there for me. XD)

YFC CAMP TMR!! gotta chiong packing after this, then sleep early.. hahaa!

okay.. i need prayers.. i've been feeling sick lately... firstly i've been having nosebleeds everyday. maybe its due to not enough water.. i duno... but i have them at night i think... when i wake up and sit up from bed blood just suddenly flows out from my nose.. yikes... and secondly.. i've been feeling slightly feverish lately.. and i've got a sore throat.. it hurts when i swallow saliva but it doesnt seeem to affect my voice.. hmmm... interesting.. oh well... maybe its psychological.. XD

Or perhaps due to anxiety or lack of sleep?

WELL! i need prayers please... :) i'll be really busy running around in china and i gotta make a video during the trip.. and cover all the events... sigh... i need to be HEALTHY and well..

hope i dont fall sick like in MT! :(

2008-08-23T09:07:00.000-07:00

okay.. i havent been blogging.. .was super busy the past few days.. in fact im once again super busy during the holidays. suddenly i've so many committments and events that i gotta help out in.

Lets see.. to prove that im not free... (i almost picked up gaming, but now no more time >.<)

To do list:

Students' night planning (plus prayer meeting + bonding day) -1 day.
One JAM august event (just over) -2 days.
STFT day (30th august one) - 1 day
ODDinary camp (YFC.) -3 days.
YEP parents day -1 day
YEP trip -2 weeks
YEP meeting (my group's turn to present.) -1 day
HI club camp ( i kind of forgot when, but its after YEP trip) -3 days
HMS leadership camp ( stylish name, but actually its just a camp for people who want to help out in next year's HMS FOC camp) -3 days

Total- 29 days out of approximately 2 months of holidays.

Hm... half my holiday gone. but plus preparation and all... gotta squeeze it in the free days. okay.. today. i had great fun during the ONE JAM event and the stayover at church.. we ordered macs AND pizza and watched stardust on the projector. hahaha! and it was an all guys thing. HAHA! the event was okay i guess.. went around trying to rah rah the kids and taught the kids my name. HAHAH! they were like "KOR KOR KENN!!!" XD Did the acting thing also. duno how i did for that though.. hahha.. i kind of fumbled and all.. made some new friends with the kids and the gb and bb people... they helped us take care of the kids.. woohoo!! more help!! good, as theres more hyperactive kids than normal XD BUT THAT MADE IT FUN RIGHT??!! =D Okay i think i kind of messed up the games... i was kind of scared abt the second game after seeing the kids fall down while playing it. but i think they had fun. hopefully the leaders had fun too. haha! esp when isaac was the only one left, then everyone was playing with him. haha! and and somehow luckily for the first game the photographers came and took photos of the winners. cos i had no idea why i asked them to come up the stage for. hahaha! then i felt bad so asked everyone to go up the stage. then everyone take photo.. HAHAHA! okay.. whew.. Thank God. if not i'll be lost cos i duno wad prize to give them... hahaha... oh well... next time gotta think of better games than simon says.. and tua beh long. (Thank God zara suggested it like a few hours before the event started. haha!) I think the ONE JAM team is really well bonded and all.. and we're nice and fun loving and we all love kids! XD and and when everyone in the team really goes all out to rah rah the kids and play with them, the feeling is really nice! =D like we have a mission to accomplish together, and we dont stick with each other and really just help out and mingle with the children and really have a great time, rather than sticking in a big group and not do much. it was really nice..

Well. i had a wierd dinner with my cousins and aunts and uncles (maternal side). We meet up almost every saturday for dinner and really talk and make alot of noise XD. its really nice to see a loving family... one that is so selfless and helpful and everyone supports each other really nicely and well :) Okay. so why was this dinner wierd? We had steamboat.

Okay theres nothing unique about that. hahahah.. BUT WAIT!!
we had steamboat in a CARPARK! HAHAHAHHAHAHA!! COOL RIGHT!!! =D
We brought tables and chairs down from the barbeque pit and brought chairs and tables from aunt cynthia's house. we ate and cooked in the carpark and had 2 steamboats going on at once. there werent enough chairs and the chairs were wet so we didnt sit around the tables but put the chairs at the sides and had something like a walkabout buffet thingy which let us talk to each other and did not have a "fixed" group to talk to like when you sit around a table. so we walked around and cooked at both steamboats and talked and laughed in the CARPARK!!!
Its really a carpark, not those kind where theres a lobby and all. We really sat in a carpark and took 3 parking lots and alot more space. it was like.. in the middle of a place that people would never expect to see people eating. hahhaa! okay the best part was seeing people's reactions when they drove past us. as it was a carpark, they drove slowly. and everyone had the EXACT SAME REACTION!! scary huh. HAHA! Everyone who drove by gave a wierd look and were gaping with the shocked look in their eyes. EVERYONE seriously had the same reaction. My cousins and i were like joking about what they would be saying.

"these people ahh... wa... no place to eat then come carpark eat ahh?!!"
"Eh... those people take so many carpark lots. And STEAMBOAT IN THE CARPARK?"
"Poor people. nowhere to eat so eat in carpark."
"Poor people." (the non-pitying sense.)
"Good idea sia.. then dun need to clean up the house after the gathering"

Super funny la.. and all their faces really matched to what we think they might say. hahaha! okay to help everyone visualise, theres photos at the end of the post. (finally, my first few photos in this blog. HAHA!)
During the steamboat dinner, apparently we kind of dropped a large sachet of soy sauce. okay. usually when such things happen, from my own observations (spillings are quite common at all gatherings, whether school or class or church) people will avoid cleaning it up. seriously. and everyone just avoids the spill, or after a really long time then one person will finally clean it up (i admit, im not the one who cleans up unless i really really really feel a need to. i think out of countless incidents, i only helped out in one. im really spoiled >.<) Okay. at this family gathering, we spilled a LARGE packet of soy sauce. almost immediately like almost everyone went to find a way to clean it up and helped to clean up at the same time. some went to get tissue, some moved the tables, threw away the plastic and all. its like... everyone is so selfless and helpful and caring for each other.. it really touched my heart, and made me feel bad that i just stood nearby and watch >.<>.< Whats more, its a carpark. its dirty and all. and they could have left it there, or at least until after the dinner then wash it off or something. but they immediately cleaned it up.... guess i have a really considerate aunts and uncles and family =D

Wait. so WHY AM I SO LAZY??!!!
Sigh. i guess laziness is nurtured, not natured. haha. oh well.

Heres where we had the 2 steamboats

Haha!! you can like see the cars..

before the dinner...boiling the soup =D

2008-08-15T10:38:00.000-07:00

I feel goood! =D

exams over. hahaha.. but i'm pretty much dead for it. i didnt do like 3 questions worth 30 marks each and i barely wrote anything for 3 more. HAHAHA!!! DEAD DEAD DEAD!! oh well..

hope i wont retain and have to retake psych >.<
eh it was super hard laa!!!!!!

Anyway, a friend of mine came up with a holiday exercise schedule. so i was like. HEY! GOOD IDEA!!! i want my own! and so here it is =D

Monday- Tennis
Tuesday- Tennis
Wednesday- Tennis
Thursday- Tennis
Friday- Tennis
Saturday- Tennis
Sunday- Church and tennis and maybe soccer

See a trend? hahahah... im going crazy about tennis. but i dont really have anyone to practice with >.<
So im like. gona play against a wall. hahaha.. so loser nia. >.<
And i gotta buy tennis balls first.
Oh, and please note that Tennis can also mean watching Prince of Tennis. HAHAHA! rocks la... im so hooked onto it. XD
though i'm pretty sure that its impossible to do most of the things they do in that anime. i got like... 200 more episodes to go. 20 mins each, so errr... 4000 minutes to go! hahahah! i might be able to finish it by next next week XD.
CHIONG!! hhahahaha

And all the best to those still taking exams! WORK HARD AND DO WELL! =D

2008-08-13T03:06:00.000-07:00

essay was down. exam to go. hahahah!

KENN START STUDYING!!!!!!!!! ITS LIKE ALOT OF CHAPTERS TO DO!! SO DO NOW!!!

hhahaha.. okay i gotta study. hahahahhaa.. kinda scary seeing how many people are mugging for the exam.. and theyre not done. hahaha.. sian.. okay...

I wrote this the other day. quite random. was walking to school and this suddenly came into my head. i think, its more of a song than a poem. oh well. anyone can help me with the tune? haha...

As Your mercies come
Washes over me
I am cleansed
I am redeemed

Spirit change me
Set my heart ablaze
Renew my strength and soul
With a passion for Your name

I'll give all i am
For You, my Lord
You are my strength

Lord set me apart
I will obey
To carry out Your will
And show the world Your grace
Eternal Lord
Purify my faith
That i will love You
And follow You each day

Cos in the darkness, God's light shines.

2008-08-07T19:52:00.000-07:00

I DID IT!!!! YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!! ESSAYYYYYY OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOHOOOo!!!!!!!!! but now im shivering from exhaustion again. hahhahhahahah.. AHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! okay gotta print. XD YAYY!!! I FINISHED!!! WOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks to those who jia youed me on! hhahahahaa... i felt so much like sleeping laa.. XD oh well =D

darn.. the dudes wanted to crash my place.. T_T WHY DO I HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL!!!! oh yea. many reasons. ahahahah! okay well got PEP, then lunch, then MEH MEH's BDAY!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEH MEH!!!!!!!!!!!!! (meehhhhhhhhhhhhh) HAHAHAHHAA (its in green! XD)
though its like. 1 day belated? =D nvm we change yr birthday to today okay? =D
sorryimlikesupersugarhigheventhoughtheresnosugar.

Happy happy birthday!! woohoo!! MUST WATCH NICE MOVIE LATER OKAY??!! =D YOULL LIKE... SEE A SUPER HYPER BANKAI KENN!! =D
(ironic, that i just wrote an essay about ADHD children right? hahahah! )

hopefully, i wont get a low grade for this essay
i do not want another D. or C. As AND Bs FROM NOW ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEA!!!!!!!! KENN CAN!

2008-08-02T07:17:00.000-07:00

I somehow find peace in writing. and writing + random personality = random writing . haha.

He stood still, barely moving a muscle, hidden behind a pillar. He watched intently as she boarded the bus, smiled and waved goodbye to her friends. Her long black hair swept behind her as she turned and proceeded deeper into the bus and finally disappeared from his view. He, however, still stood there, stiff as a statue, eyes opened wide, pupils dilated. The shadow of her smile was pictured clearly in his mind, in which time seemed to be put on "pause" the very moment she smiled. His heart beat harder and harder, and it seemed like his heart wanted to escape his body and go after the bus which was leaving. He continued to stand on the same spot, as if hoping that she would somehow appear again, and perhaps even show that mesmerizing smile.

2008-07-31T08:49:00.001-07:00

I actually wrote a poem a few days ago, but just cant complete it. Its actually a christian poem... meant to tell a story about christianity and all.. but i just dont feel that its nice. or good. oh well...

i dont feel worthy of writing christian stories in a poem form. not only is it hard, but i seem to be forcing alot of words out rather than feeling and writing the poems as i usually do.. sigh.. thus, i've written a disaster.

somehow, maybe its also due to myself. i feel... spiritually low.. in fact i really doubt i should do campus e tomorrow. or even have a student's night meeting this sunday... in times of low.. i am.. dangerous, i guess. i dont want to pull anyone else down onto this low with me.. this feeling of hopeless and uselessness... and how im unable to do anything about it.. and once again i question whether what i am doing now is something good or bad. am i supposed to be in my course? i feel so.. inferior.. and stressed.. i cant seem to score up to the standard of my classmates.. i lack a proper motivation to study hard.. and for some reason, i feel that rumours are going around about me. i dont get it. why? i duno if im overreacting or something, but somehow i feel that something negative is being spread about me that should be brought up. and im pretty sure its about me being noisy. or a hyperactive. once again people will have something to complain about me. i guess theres something about me everyone loves to hate.

i seriously lack a proper motivation for this course. everyone here has a reason to be here, and their reasons are all so touching that all their stories can be written down and made into like 85 different movies. and theyre gona have GREAT storylines...i dont feel like i belong.. in fact now i think about it, what is my motivation to come into this course anyway???? to change lives would not exactly be correct. i wanted to change lives after entering this course, not before. what exactly made me put pcs as my second choice? sigh..

actually, i prayed alot as to what to put as my second choice. i was stuck between biomedical and pcs. i actually am too ashamed to share the following during sharing times. the REAL reason why i put pcs as my second choice and not biomedical was because i felt a calling for it. wierd. i felt that God somehow prompted me to put that as my choice over biomedical. i did it without much resistance. true. but that was because somehow i felt that i could get into acjc. so i just put pcs first then biomedical next. when i found out i was accepted into pcs, i did not appeal for a few reasons. firstly i was too lazy to move from my bed. secondly i thought i might find a motivation and come to understand why i was put in this course. i was wrong. i was lamenting me being put into this course. which was why i kept "boasting" about my course before i entered. i know it seemed irritating and im sure many people thought i was cocky or something, but no one apparently detected that i was SUPER sarcastic when i said those "good" things about the course. i wanted to remind myself of the good points of the course and try to convince myself somehow that i want to go there.. the result? well. i think some of my friends couldnt stand me after that. probably more gossip. great. just perfect.

I.. thought i found my motivation in someone. but i was wrong. i was too ambitious, too quick, that i became totally selfish and let my emotions take over.i was so blinded that i did not know my own limits and i was too hopeful of some things to happen. i said and did stuff with the best of intentions and motives, but yet with horrible outcomes that only do alot more harm than any good (to which i doubt there was anything good about it). i said some things without thinking and this resulted in her keeping her distance from me. i somehow feel we were on better terms back then. as in friends. then i did something stupid and well. i guess shes kinda keeping her distance. i think. i might be thinking too much. or maybe thats just how she is.i dont know. all i can do is regret. what was i thinking? there is no way ever that my hopes would have came true. the... heirachy is way too far apart. im just way too lousy, ugly, stupid, heartless, selfish, and a total freak.

then came my class. i think its great, and i cant hope for a better class. but still, i dont think anyone has ever noticed how i dont fit in with the class. i still dont exactly have a set group of friends i stick to. i feel left out. i know i've probably made friends. great friends. but i somehow still dont really feel welcome into my class. like i'm just a sore thumb thats sticking out, still looking for a place to fit in.

i somehow dont think anyone can ever see this part of my life. everything i feel is hidden behind a smile, or sometimes a laugh. even when i really hate some comments or things said, i still laugh. or smile. its all minor and all, yes. but minor things, overtime, is still able to cause great impacts. like water in erosion. sometimes its just too painful to smile, and at those times i really feel like retaliating. but i dont. and it still continues on. and yet either i still smile, or i walk away.

whoever said that you can solve problems just by smiling is crazy.

oh wait. i said that. i guess it proves im crazy

2008-07-27T06:58:00.001-07:00

This post is dedicated to a dear friend of mine. You know who you are, i'm sorry i was angry with you previously, but theres a reason why i believe church is not something you should skip or forgo "just one time" or anything. I hope this post will help you to understand, that is, should you ever read it.

God moved during the sermon today.

I just know it.

Not only did i feel it

But i guess others as well

Though it was.. about tithing..

Something i thought should just be encouraged,

And not something that was important.

And not only 10 percent of your income

Its also 10 percent of your TIME.

The pastor brought up the issue about going to church

But firstly, tithing is not about the money.

True, 10 percent of your income/allowance should be tithed

However, its not the amount but the devotion and testimony that you bring with it that matters.

By tithing, you give back a little part of what God has given you.

It is a command, by the way.

And it doesn't even belong to you in the first place.

God provided all

Tithing is a symbol of our devotion to God and others,

And is a declaration of our faith.

But God didn't just command us to do it without any reward.

Malachi 3: 8-10

8 "Will a man rob God? Yet you rob me.
"But you ask, 'How do we rob you?'
"In tithes and offerings. 9 You are under a curse—the whole nation of you—because you are robbing me. 10 Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this," says the LORD Almighty, "and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it.

If memory serves me well, this is the ONLY time ever where God asks us to TEST him

And thats only a small part of the significance

Can you imagine the reward God promises?

Wow.

All these He promises, just from giving Him 10 percent.

So why hold back?

Now, how does this link to what had happened?

Well, as stated earlier, tithing is also 10 percent of our time

Each day has 24 hours

You do the Math.

Have you met the tithing criteria?

I doubt it.

Rarely has anyone done so.

Thats why, in the approximately 15 hours we are awake on a sunday

We use them for God.

To spend time with Him

To love Him

To worship Him

To learn His will

And just be awed by the way He does things in our lives

Thats why i'm so particular about going to church.

Sorry if i may seem unreasonable,

But its not even something i came up with

Its in the bible.

So please, treasure your sundays

Its the only time in a week where we devote a lum sum of overdue tithes to God

Church is not something to be taken lightly

Its actually a command of God

And besides, its not like church is a place that you dread, right?

Its a nice place

With nice people

And everyweek, I feel like i walk out of church feeling accomplished

And satisfied

And joyful

I hope you feel the same too.

Don't think its "just one time" that you arent going to church

That one time itself is extremely important

Dont you look forward to church everyweek?

Or is it some place you visit weekly?

I really do hope that youll think about what i've mentioned

We owe God so much

And He requests so little from us

We should give Him everything we have

Yet all He asks is 10 percent

Some people give more

Some give less

Some just give that 10 percent

Which group of people do you want to belong to?

Which one do you currently belong to?

2008-07-26T12:23:00.000-07:00

It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you

2008-07-25T12:41:00.000-07:00

Kenn, stop losing your cool.

not that youre cool or anything,

just stop getting angry

its not your place

its not your right

let God do the justice work

you yourself arent justified

who are you to judge whats right or wrong?

maybe its okay

but maybe it aint

stay back, kenn

you arent doing anyone any good

just relax

its their choice

not yours

they arent you

no one else is

theyll do things differently

they'll see things differently

one day if they understand

then good

but if they dont

maybe eventually then

Sometimes you get scared and wonder WHAT you're doing here.

Its not exactly a question you worry about usually as you just have to trust.

But you tend to forget your place.

Kenn, breathe.

Stop making yourself miserable.

You yourself know you aren't a naggy person

So stop trying to be one

Be yourself.

Happy.

Always.

Life's good when you open your eyes and see

Christ died on the cross for me

2008-07-20T08:48:00.000-07:00

I think, i just had one of the most fun camps ever.

Okay.. my friday was super long.. and sat i was too tired to post.. Fri started with cats, then soccer. Soccer was super fun i guess.. played match today.. and my team won! =D it was quite funny.. cos at first i was in the yellow team (with the bips) then after my team scored 2 goals the coach asked me to swap to the blue team (without bips) and the blue team scored 4 goals and won, final score 4-3 =D. maybe i was their lucky charm? haha.. i have no idea.. maybe cos at first too many people in yellow team.. haha!

Anyway.. after that i had dinner with alden and talked with him alot then. i then chionged to fairfield for the ROD day to meet up with my dear NCC friends =D. i miss them loads.. when i met them its like we havent seen each other for super long and everyone has changed so much since i last met them. being with them reminded me of our 4 years in NCC and made me miss those days so so much... the times we all suffered together and stuck with each other and helped each other... sadly i couldnt stay long as after a while i had to go back to NP for a camp... so i left with a heavy heart... T_T

For a while i thought of ponning camp.. cos i really missed my friends alot.. but then i made a committment to YEP and i wanted to fulfill it.. so i dragged myself to camp. I have to say honestly, at first, i didnt really feel very welcome or comfortable around everyone. i didnt really remember everyone's names yet and i didnt really feel comfortable with talking with everyone. Then it came to the time where we had to share 3 significant experiences in our lives with everyone, and promised confidentiality. therefore, what was said in the room stays among us =D. i guess that like made everyone share alot of personal things... the person who went first.. i think that person really encouraged us to share really personal stuff by volunteering to go first. after that everyone felt comfortable sharing personal experiences. I was.. shocked. Everyone had a really touching and shocking experience to share, and what some of them shared i really felt for them and honestly i almost cried myself while hearing them share. I felt that my experiences in life was nothing. NOTHING compared to what the rest have been through... and theyre still so strong and happy and so willing to carry out community services and to go on this trip. i really felt... bonded.. right after everyone sharing so much.. and after that i no longer felt uncomfortable... maybe one day, we should carry out such sharing sessions in OCEAN. but i doubt that OCEAN will be so honest and open about their lives.

Anyway, we took like.. untill 2 or 3 am and went back to our bunks. the loft. Super comfortable, besides the fact that there was so many ants. it was like a chalet. except that, quoting one of the YEP members, the only difference between the loft and chalet is that theres no TV. HAHAHA!!!! true true.. but hey. we couldnt sleep much as some of the PCS year 1 people ( us!!!) mostly didnt finish the e portfolio or the RJ5 or both, so we gathered our laptops and did our work. so sad right.. cannot sleep T_T. well our bunk people then had this crazy idea to order macs, so we asked around and mass ordered macs.. and bargained for curry sauce... but they still stinged on it and gave us like 6 only.. even though alot of people ordered. well the thing came and we ate happily =D. after that i went and continued my work and finished at around 4 plus. then played rise of nations for no reason. i was freaking tired la.. hahaha.. oh well....I woke up like 5 minutes before the gathering time and chionged brushing my teeth =D. then we had morning exercises.... most people were like.. looking quite stoned. haha! maybe cos we didnt really sleep much.. anyway we went hyper during the games. ran 2 rounds then had to plan games without any equipment. to practice for china, where we might have to play games without any equipment or props. they were quite fun.. haha! after the games, on the way back, the 1A02 girls had this idea to play this car game at the overhead bridge to kismis. it was smth like... pretend that you are really trying to jaywalk on the expressway, so dont let the cars "hit" you while crossing the overhead bridge. well it was quite fun. hahah! even miss janice joined in. hahahha... =D we laughed about it all the way back into the bunks, where we had a short break. i used the break to take a bath.. haha.. if i remember correctly we went back into the lecturer's bunk to have breakfast then had some sharing and stuff... oh well.. that part is abit fuzzy in my memory.. so i cant really remember until we went out for lunch and we played this game by the road, on the way to the market.( credits to the 1A02 girls again! =D) it was that we had to jump whenever a car passes by.. pretend we were mario or smth.. ahha! quite funny... especially when we imagined the driver's reactions to a whole group of polytechnic people uniformly jumping up and down at the same time when their cars passed by. lunch was funny. firstly where i sat, we talked to each other quite alot and made alot of noise. hahaha! got to know some people better... when we went back to the loft we played the same jumping game.. we had some sharing sessions again i think.. then had to do some acting. at first i was like.. no problem. then i found out we had to act and say out the lines in CHINESE! uh oh. hahaha.. for those who dont know, my chinese is super GOOD!!! (yea right) anyway i struggled abit, and used english words when i didnt know how to say it in chinese. like everyone was laughing at me la.. hahaa! oh well.. i think the part they remember the most was when i literally translated plant rice from english to chinese. so i said "zhong fan". hahaha! perfect ending? XD i gotta improve my chinese... it was funny in sg, but while in YEP they may take it as an insult. sigh... oh well... we had many other activities and games... then had a short break where i took a nap and we had dinner! =D we danced some circle dance and went to eat... haha.. catered food =D. the food was not bad la.. haha.. quite nice... just that the drinks abit too sweet... well.. .the 1A02 girls shared some funny stories and jokes and we all like listened super intently and roared with laughter until everyone was aching in the stomaches. hahaha! well the way she shared those jokes... her facial expressions.. all super good.. hahaa! she can tell jokes REALLY WELL! anyway we all were too full from laughter to eat anymore food.. hahaha... after that we kinda closed and went home. on the way home.. played the jumping game with gab.. haha.. felt super high at that time.. maybe cos from the laughter. took bus home and went on msn convo with the committee for students night to discuss about it.
Oh yea. err... saturday morning, at around 3-4am, i opened my email and there was 2 emails that i had to read over and over again, as i couldnt believe what they said. both were from desmond. the first one said that i was leading the concluding lesson on Romans today. and there was like.. only a few verses to help me conclude.. i was totally shocked. the next email shocked me more. but as i was super tired i had like a super lag reaction. It was regarding the student's night committee, the allocations of the positions in the committee. so i was reading desmond's message... then i was looking for my name under

logistics..
not there..
F&B...
not there...
Programme...
not there either...

I thought i was not appointed for any positions until i saw like the very first name at the top of the list of positions.
Chairman - Yew Hann Kenn

Being the blur block i was, at first i was like.. whoa.. suay guy... whos he ahh??? then i realised its me. i totally WOKE UP at that point la... it was me. just that my surname is Yee, now Yew, but its okay cos its probably due to my untidy handwriting while applying for positions. hahah! i was appointed chairperson?? i tot smth must have been wrong. how?? WHY??!!! i put that as my last choice la.. 1st was programme i think.. then logistics.. then chair. 2 others put it as their second. why not them?? why meee???? sigh..

but i didnt object. i duno why. part of me felt like i should take the lead. the lazy and shy part of me wanted to step down and let someone take over. whyy meeeee!! im a super lazy and incapable person lor.. but then again, God empowers! =D so i guess... well maybe i should give it a try... i mean... i must have been chosen by the leaders for a reason right? maybe cos the others who applied chairperson were in jc or smth. so theyll be super busy.

at least that was what i thought.

i questioned des today and he said i was one of the 2 choices for chairperson, and they decided by a roll of a dice. hey hey what?!?!! roll dice??? eeee... felt so cheated :P. but alex talked to me.. thanks alex!!! =D and said that it must have been God's will, as theres no such thing as chance... all things are done for a reason.. so i guess.. i will give it a try! =D

First things first, gotta prove to myself that i can organise things by making next week's outing for OCEAN a success! =D ohwell.. hope that everyone is excited about the picnic..

2008-07-16T10:07:00.000-07:00

A prayer to the Lord

In this world
Lord make us willing
To carry out Your will
To do Your bidding

Through all life's troubles
And those happy times too
I'll show everyone
What prayer can do

Lord teach me to pray
Like never before
To surrender all worries
And give You my all

And yet when i succeed
Lord help me remember
That everything can be done
Only through prayer

Lord give me a heart
Thats willing to serve
To preach the great Gospel
To the ends of the Earth

That people will hear
And people will change
And themselves spread the Gospel
And in heaven proclaim

Holy is the Lord
Great is His love
Stretches from below
To the heavens above

Lord help me to be
Sincere and true
Make these words I proclaim
Turn into actions for You

Lord help me to choose
Between studying and prayer
Not to worry about the first
But focus on the latter

For I know You'll help me
For without You I can't
Lord You are my strength
My wisdom, my heart

2008-07-13T08:27:00.000-07:00

Chains be broken

Lives be healed

Eyes be opened

Christ is revealed.

Cause i know You'll come
Whenever i fall
Lord you'll be with me
You'll guide me through it all

Even at certain times
When lives are broken apart
When you can't see His hands
Just trust His Heart

The knowledge of Your grace
The abundance of Your love
When trouble stirs here below
You'll carry me up above

Lord You care for me
What else can i do?
Forever i will be
Indebted to You

Words alone cannot describe
No one can comprehend
The wonders of Your love
The love that never ends

Let the broken come
Let the sinners pray
Let the fallen lament
And be amazed by Your grace

For the broken will heal
The sinners repent
The fallen rise up
Their hearts You will mend

Its not what they were
But what they will become
After a taste of Your love
Their lives will have begun

Who dares to fathom?
No one can truly see
Amazing love, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me

2008-07-13T05:58:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, some things in life you already know the choice you should take. yet some things you would rather do distract you from what you know you have to do. you already know what you should do. maybe you shouldnt think about those temptations lest you submit to them too.

the past few days have been stressful for me. assignments and all. actually maybe i'm just stressed everyday. oh well.. theres so many things to think about and so many things to handle. responsibility itself keeps hitting me on the head and asking me to step out of line to do things i never would have thought of doing, but am now. yet still some things i feel responsible for, i still deny them, pretending that it doesnt affect me and feigning ignorance. or i carry it out halfway such that it seems like i've tried, but in actual fact i just let the responsibilities crumble and fail.

I neeeed sleep. sigh......

2008-07-08T09:31:00.000-07:00

Into Your hands
I commit again
With all i am
For You, Lord.

This is a sinner's prayer. Lord, many things have been going on that i cant stand. many things have been going on that has tested my patience time and time again. Lord, please help me in being patient and understanding. please help me to not let my mind wander and overreact to even the smallest of actions. for every single thing i somehow and bothered by them. but Lord i know that somehow You must have a reason for my paranoia. all things are done for a reason. Lord please help me forget about the problems that have surfaced in my life. Many things that i never could have imagined came true. people i have mistaken as friends have put me in situations where they do not even acknowledge me, reply me or even want to talk to me after so many years of friendship. Lord, help me to forget about her. i've known her for so long, been good friends for so long, yet i am just an expendable part of her life. i know i've brought her alot of pain and hardships and yes i guess i deserve how she has been treating me lately, but Lord, i pray that somehow there will still be some acknowledgement of each other. i do not want to lose within a year what has taken around 3 years to establish. whilst she continues her cold war with me, Lord i pray that her reasons for doing so will be fulfilled. help her in her schoolwork, help her to find someone else, help her with her exams. Lord, help her to forget about all the hurtful things in her life, especially me. that what remains of me in her memory was the times when we were still friends and the days when we had first met. help me to forget about her. help me to accept that she no longer wants to talk. Lord i pray that in the midst of all the problems surfacing in my life, i pray that You'll constantly remind me that You're in charge of my life. Lord remind me that all the hardships and problems are part of Your plan. that it is Your will. that through these, i will be able to learn from my mistakes and never make those mistakes again, that i'll live a life free from regrets. Lord i pray that You'll comfort me through these trying times. Lord, as according to Your will, i pray that these problems would be solved quickly and properly. that no matter what happens, i'll climb back onto my own two feet soon. Lord i pray for OCEAN. somehow i still feel that i need to play an active role in helping them unite. i pray that i can do it. Lord i pray for my friends. i pray that theyll see the reasons for where You have put them, that they'll be successful in their studies according to Your will, that they'll be blessed so richly that theyll be blessing others just as richly. Lord i pray that You'll help me in this course that i am in. I pray that i would make full use of the time while im in this course. that i'll actually have a future and do what You want me to do. Though i am still deciding on some things currently, i pray that You'll help me make a decision ultimately and pursue it with all my heart, mind and soul, as that is what You have planned for me to be, and my target is to follow Your will. help me to commit everything into Your gentle hands. all my worries and problems, all the good things and the happiness too, that i may follow You unconditionally and wholeheartedly throughout this walk with You in life. Amen.

2008-07-07T08:41:00.000-07:00

Okay. heres the tacklegames post.

My first time as manager. hahaha.. yea i know i sucked. i really liked the teams' planning at first. the teams were split up very evenly. then 5 of them ( the older ones ) wanted to form their own team. so we had 3 teams. from there, i made shaun pick who he wanted in his team. from there i tot the teams were good. we had 1 reserve for each team.

The teams were:
Team D- Alden (Captain) azan gabriel joel kenneth timothy
Team E- Shaun (Captain) alex hg deric leroy jj

Team D. i tot they played pretty well, but the final score was 1-1. drawed. oh well.. i noticed that our team did not have much possession of the ball on the first match. we kept losing it and giving them kick-ins and corners. and the goal that we scored was an own goal by the opponent. but it was super funny. for the other matches the team had more possession and played pretty well =D. but we didnt really shoot much i find. i guess our team needed someone who keeps shooting. but nvm.. at least they drawed, won, lose , won, (semis) lose lose. alden did well as captain, coming up with strategies and all. the semis were a frustrating loss though. we really could have won the semifinal. really. but there were some misunderstandings and the opponent scored at last attack.

Team E. their defense was good. leroy was a good defender. the only problem was shaun had to play all positions and he had a knee injury. he played super well before his old injury came back. oh well.. so the striker was gone. but he managed to almost score a few times despite his injury. really very close. and the time where we drawed was super nice. hahaha. but we lost the rest. oh well.. i hope everyone had fun. though losing is frustrating.. but sometimes we gotta play for the love of soccer. for the match where we played D vs E, sorry that i "fixed" the match abit. tai tai played keeper.. well i dont know if i did the right thing letting her play (she let in like 3 goals in the first 5 mins) but i just wanted everyone to like enjoy themselves or something. well she wanted to try. and well i let her play.

I hope everyone had a good time. even though we didnt win and the teams were abit off. the main point of me wanting to organise this soccer team was actually to have everyone enjoy themselves and hopefully be able to get people to come to faith. to be able to attract them into faith. to use soccer as an evangelistical tool. to bring people to Christ.

Tsk.

2008-07-06T09:57:00.000-07:00

I am- the perfect word would be- demoralised.

I am sick of trying to organise things so that people can try to hang out with each other. sick and tired. I am sick and tired of wasting my breath trying to drag people to go out as a group. Fed up with how people fail to see why i do such things in the first place. Doesn't anyone get why i'm trying to bring everyone closer together? but i guess everyone prefers to be in their cliques. Forget it. i'm not organising anything anymore. If this JC POLY thing becomes another conflict similar to the pure sciences combined sciences conflict, i dont think i shall care anymore. let it be, then, since everyone wants to keep it that way. yes go study all you want. study. go on. no ones stopping all of you now.

I've apparently had 3 days straight of sports. Friday tennis, Saturday soccer, Sunday soccer. well... its quite fun i guess. helps me keep my mind off some annoying things. kills stress well too. i've been sleeping very little lately. E learning weeks are like way more stressful than normal school days. too much homework and having to do ridiculously stupid homework phrased by some crazy teachers who have nothing better to do, thus adds useless things to the assignments, making them super complicated and phrases them in such a way that its so freaking difficult to understand what the lecturers want. cant they be clearer? tsk.

There was an arguement at anfield(dover) today. alex mentioned somethings that really got me thinking. after hearing what he had to say, i kinda felt moved. i never knew alex could speak so well, and is able to provide advice so well. he has a strong sense of what is right and wrong and boldly proves his points. interesting. after that i kind of had to think- will i ever be able to speak like that? to talk to people in that way? i doubt it. somehow i am just some dude trying to create a future in something im not familiar in. something that isnt a natural part of me. i dont think i can provide good counselling. i dont think i can relate from my own experiences. so why did i take psychology??!!! its like something i cant do. something that i might never be good in. i pray that someday i'll be able to gain talents that will help me in this path.

2008-07-02T10:27:00.000-07:00

Theres something about your smile
That steals away my mind
Such that every single action
Seems to me a sign

Theres something about your eyes
That sometimes i can see
You and i together
For all eternity

Theres something about your voice
That calls out loud my name
For every single sentence
Everything sounds the same

Theres something about your touch
That brings me to my knees
That someday when you need me
I'll provide, i'll offer, i'll give

Theres something about your lips
That sings to me a song
For your every sweet single word
To me, lasts forever and long

Theres something about your hands
That makes me want to hold
And be with you through life
Never letting go

Theres something about your frown
That aches this beating heart so
For every tear that you shed
Brings my emotions down low

Theres something about you
That makes me alive
Even though i sometimes fail you
I promise i'll be with you for life.

2008-06-28T10:11:00.001-07:00

I'm like super tired. just finished like 2 matches of dota. totally zoned out while playing. couldnt think, was like standing still half the time, and like stoned super often. hahaha..

Anyway i spent time chatting with marianne and leroy in a msn conference yesterday. super fun. hahha.. i daresay we 3 are quite similar in thoughts =D. So far they both have ganged up against me. haahahaah. so fast. meet each other already can gang up on me. tsk. hahaha.. well i raved alot last night. went crazy. i hate staying up late but somehow i didnt feel like sleeping while talking to them. so in the end i slept super late. refer to marianne's blog to find out how late =D

As a result, i couldnt wake up for one camp. spent super long trying to get up, but in the end still managed to get to Faith on time. woohoo!!! and i was actually a little early. and when i entered the chapel i remembered i forgot to wear my camp t shirt. hahahaha. but luckily i was wearing brown. so can camo abit =D well i helped in singspiration AGAIN as usual ( arrow me to help cos im in one jam huh.. ) along with alden... got to meet my camp group ( like less than half of it, sadly... but got 2 people who didnt go for camp joining us ) but anyway its still okay.. got them to share abit.. but i didnt have enough time to share abt TTB with them.. haiz... then the funny thing happened. to promote ttb, the camp people used a video i made super long ago, initially intended for parents' day. well.. i think that was like one of my best videos ever la.. i liked it alot and somehow, my standards have dropped in video making. i need to be more creative.. hahaha... okay anyway the photos used in the video were really old. brought back alot of memories for me...

after camp echo i got to meet a few people.. talked to them abit and got to know their names.. traded contact numbers with them and i went for lunch with hg and alden and peiwen's friends. it was really hilarious lunch. hahahah.. we went long john's, then talked like super alot ( i talk alot when im sleepy.. no idea why. ) and joked around. then some gb girls entered and recognised me. okayyy.. i admit i only recognised like a few of them out of a grp of about 8. mainly the one that kept screaming during camp whenever she was poked. and she was poked non-stop. hahahha... traded contact numbers with them and invited them to come visit TTB. hopefully theyll come =D. after that went to tanglin halt for dessert. perfect. hahhahaha... after that it was just alden and i and we had to kill time before our one jam meeting. so we dotaed. but we only had 15 mins, so after first blood we quitted and headed upstairs.

the meeting was basically abt stock taking and checking of everything. and i was zombified most of the time and so i cant really remember much. we ended at around 6 plus and i took a bus back all the way. went home, edmund asked me to play, and so i did. and got trashed in 2 games. hahahahah..

On my way home, i saw something that pissed me off. yet i didnt do anything about it. near my house, theres a swimming pool. near the pool is some fish pond. there was some kid catching fishes with his hands from the pond and bringing it into the swimming pool and playing around with it. i didnt really look at what he did but apparently it wasnt just one fish i guess. and he was playing it with another girl, alot younger, apparently his younger sister. poor fish. seriously. what did the fish ever do to you so that you can take it out of its home and bring it into another environment, after which it would probably die from a sudden temperature drop. probably. all i know is that it will die cos the water is different temperatures/compositions. if i put you in like 40 degrees celcius of water and suddenly drop you in the sea at the north pole or something, even if it is like for a minute, will you die? i think so. probably of shock.

anyway. i still dont know why i kept quiet. should have acted way older than my age and like totally scold them. maybe cos i really wanted to go home and sleep, which in the end i didnt do either. tsk. okay.. gotta chiong sleep now. hahahaha.. need to form 2 soccer teams for tackle games tmr...

2008-06-24T07:50:00.000-07:00

It is not a human right
To stare, not fight
While broken nations dream

Open up our eyes, so blind
That we might find
The mercy for the need

Singing,
Hey, now
Fill our hearts with Your compassion
Hey, now
As we hold to our confession
Yeah.

It is not too far a cry
Too much to try
To help the least of these

Politics will not decide
If we should rise
To be Your hands and feet

Singing,
Hey, now
Fill our hearts with Your compassion
Hey, now
As we hold to our confession

Whoa-oh-oh
God be the solution
Whoa-oh-oh
We will be Your hands
And be Your feet.
Yeah,
Yeah.

Higher than a circumstance
Your promise stands
Your love for all to see

Higher than the protest lines
And dollar signs
YOUR LOVE IS ALL WE NEED

Singing,
Hey, now
Fill our hearts with Your compassion
Hey, now
As we hold to our confession

Whoa-oh-oh
God be the solution
Whoa-oh-oh
We will be Your hands,
And be your feet

Whoa-oh-oh
God be the solution
Whoa-oh-oh
We will be Your hands,
And be Your feet

Only You can MEND the broken heart,
And cause the blind to SEE,
ERASE complete the sinner's past,
And set the captives FREE.

Only You can TAKE the widow's cry,
And cause her heart to SING,
Be a FATHER to the fatherless,
Our SAVIOR and our KING

We will be Your Hands
We will be Your Feet
We will run this race
With the least of these

In the darkest place
We will be Your light
We will be Your light

WE WILL BE YOUR HANDS
WE WILL BE YOUR FEET
WE WILL RUN THIS RACE
WITH THE LEAST OF THESE

IN THE DARKEST PLACE
WE WILL BE YOUR LIGHT
WE WILL BE YOUR LIGHT
WE'LL SING

Whoa-oh-oh
God be the solution
Whoa-oh-oh
We will be Your hands,
And be Your feet

Whoa-oh-oh
God be the solution
Whoa-oh-oh
We will be Your hands,
And be Your feet

We will run,
We will run,
We will grow with our solution.

We will run,
We will run,
We will grow with our solution.

We will be Your hands
We will be Your feet
We will run this race
With the least of these

In the darkest place
We will be Your light
We will be Your light
We'll sing.

I love this song. Its amazing. Its like rededicating my life to God everytime i worship with this song.

Its a statement of our faith.
Its a statement of our love.
Its a statement of His love.
Its a statement for our lives.

We will be Your hands and be Your feet

And, the bridge is really meaningful. It puts a smile to my face everytime i hear it. It rekindles the passion for God. It tells us the miracles He has done in our lives.

Amen.

2008-06-23T08:20:00.000-07:00

RANDOM POEM!!! =D

Theres so many things i wanna say
So many things i wanna do
But somehow somethings holding me back
And keeping me away from you

Its just plain feelings and emotions
But what do emotions have to say?
Sometimes stress just floods my head
But still i think of you each day

I tell myself everyday
its not love- it'll fade with time
But yet things doesnt seem that way
Or maybe i secretly dont want you out of my mind

2008-06-21T05:56:00.000-07:00

I was bored, needed a break from my essay, and thus i decided to go wild =D okay.. heres a story for everyone to enjoy and think about. lets see how many different interpretations different people might have just from this short story! =D

This is a story about a boy.

He laid alone, in the middle of a huge open field. There were no trees around, no lights, no signs of civilization except for the well trimmed grass he was lying on. The grass was cool, slightly moist, but extremely comfortable as they softened the ground below him, making it perhaps the most idyllic place to sleep in. The only noise was the soft calming sound of crickets calling out in the middle of the cool night. The sky was littered with stars shining brightly, such that the sky seemed like billions of people sending morse codes using a torchlight to him. A gentle, soft and cool breeze blew every so often, bringing with it the sweet smell of the night. He was...
comfortable.

And as he lay down, he smiled and exclaimed happily,
"Praise the Lord!"

Now just about a week later, he once again lay on the ground. However, the once cool grass had withered, thus became a huge patch of brown soil, extremely dry and slightly cracked. The weather had changed drastically to a hot, sunny and humid weather. The hard ground and thick balls of mud as hard as rocks poked against his back, as if he was lying on a huge bed of rocks. Beads of sweat trickled down his forehead and dripped on the ground, like a drizzle of rain. His shirt was soaked full of sweat and his mouth wide opened, as if trying to cool himself just like how a dog does. The heat made him too lazy to move a muscle and as he lay there, the only movement he made was a heavy panting and gasping, as if he was too lazy to even breathe. He felt dizzy from the heat, and yet the merciless sun did not seem to want to let the temperature drop at all.

And as he lay there, he looked up towards the glaring sun and faintly whispered,
"God does not exist."

2008-06-20T10:38:00.000-07:00

Siannn.... i've got like 1100 words more to go for my essay. dont think i'll sleep tonight. at least, until i finish my essay. God help me.

I had quite a long day. spent the entire day procrastinating. great. then went for dinner and to hang out with my journalism friends, but in the end only my year people went i guess.. haha! well i still had a great time. we kinda went wild and crazy and talked alot... XD

Tomorrow.. gotta hand up my T-shirt design for the kids jam shirt, and theres a meeting for one jam.. to discuss about stuff i guess.. sighh.. i need more time siaa... dammit. why must i procrastinate?? i hate procrastination and yet i cant seem to rid myself of that evil habit. maybe i should try using classical conditioning on myself? XD Btw.. that means using rewards and punishments on myself to try to decrease procrastination and increase dilligence =D haha! time for applications.. XD

Lord, help me. I've been feeling down and stressed lately.. Remind me again that You are King. Remind me again that You're in charge. Lord i place all my troubles and problems in Your hands. Help me to overcome them. Amen

2008-06-19T04:39:00.000-07:00

Okay. I'm a day late for posting abt combined camp as yesterday i was just wayyy too tired to do anything.

Camp was great. i was extremely surprised to find out that i was appointed assistant group leader. then again, when i checked the list, i was like one of the oldest in the group. haha.. so i guess its not really much of a surprise. the only person i knew well in the group would be deb. but she was a station master and wasnt with the group most of the time as she had to do the games. so that left me to get to know my group a little better. i had to like talk alot to my group to try to get them out of their cliques. there were very obvious cliques among the groups. The BB would stick to the BB, the GB to the GB, the FaithActs to the FaithActs, and TTB to the TTB. in these kinds of situations, what could i do?

Well. i did not really do much at first. i saw deborah talking to the girls and making friends with them. well the girls got quite used to each other, but what about the guys? firstly i tried making friends with the BB guys. but apparently the BB and the FA guys got together abit okay. i felt like the FA guy was abit warmer and he got more comfortable around me i guess. but after all in the end the guys got along rather well. but now the guys and girls were 2 different cliques. haha! so yea.. but in the end i think we became KNIGHTS ultimately, and not knights girls or knights guys.

Honestly, the camp was quite exhausting cos of the games. Sadistic games that seemed quite simple but in the end required alot of thinking. One thing i remember extremely well was the hoop game, where everyone is supposed to put 1 finger out to support a hula hoop and we are supposed to, as a team, lower to hoop and touch the floor and bring it back up, making sure that everyone's fingers are all the while touching the hoop. The other team got 23 seconds. i was like whoa.. not bad. so my team spent a little while planning. ( strategy, guys! ) okay lets see.. this game sounded easy but it really wasnt. the hoop tends to like not move at times cos like someone is not bringing the hand down and it was very hard to tell who was the one. and okay it was our turn to try.

caleb was timing us. he said "Start!" and we finished it before he even clicked the stopwatch. He blinked at us, shocked and said "Eh i havent even started the stopwatch. Do again do again." so okay.. then melvin told us to put our finger properly. okay so we did that. then we started again. this time abit of a holdup at first, but our timing was like 8 seconds. down and up. woohoo! new record? =Dwell i took that as a gauge on how knights were able to think and move as one. well after that we stopped the next game halfway as there was lightning and they were striking really often and really close to us. Minghui said smth about if you feel your hairs standing up, immediately like crouch and curl onto the floor. Okay that was interesting. really. but i guess it was kind of scary. the lightning really struck extremely close and we were like almost on open ground. well Thank God that no one got hurt or injured or struck by lightning throughout the camp =D
I enjoyed myself throughout the camp. Theres no denying it. though i felt some parts i could do without (cleaning, walking, running, the fear factor though it was quite fun ) but overall everything adds to the "funness" of the camp.

Okay. im gona skip to the sharing part. many people think that i came up with the sharing idea. i'm gona say... no. i didnt. i actually didnt really believe that everyone would turn up for the sharing, or that the ocean grp in the camp would be willing to sacrifice time to share. i guess everyone surprised me! okay i didnt come up with the sharing thing. the night before the camp, i somehow felt a strong urge to get the oceans to spend some time together, to talk about their day and to bond more. It was a really random and sudden want. i cant really explain it. I guess God spoke to me to organise that sharing thing. i hope everyone felt that it was meaningful. it was really nice and satisfying to see the team so willing to share and sacrifice their sleeping time and all. it made me remember the differences in our group since sec 1 until now. How we all have matured and grown. how we were so seperated from each other in the past, and yet now we are able to snap back and bond as a team whenever we want to. all credit goes to our teamleaders, and ultimately God =D

I do hope and pray that this team that has bonded so well in the camp is able to reach out to the entire OCEAN and from there make OCEAN a loving community where everyone is close to everyone and is able to support each other spiritually, emotionally and mentally and physically at all times. And that OCEAN would, after reaching that goal, grow in numbers and spiritually, that we may have an entire God-loving and God-fearing group all ready to further His kingdom, and are furthering His kingdom. That we'll always stay bonded and united no matter what, and be extremely open =D

Lord, i pray for OCEAN. We need a united OCEAN. One without any cliques. One without any preferences of friends. One where everyone finds unity, feels comfortable in, able to bond and communicate, able to share freely, trusts each other, loves each other, and loves God with all their heart, mind and soul, and from there is able to affect TTB positively as a role model and is able to cause a change in TTB, then in Faith, then to Commonwealth, then to Singapore, then the World. Though it does sound a bit unbelieveable, but Lord, all things are possible through You. For you are the Lord of everything. Lord, let this kid's dream turn into reality, through anyone You appoint. Lord i pray that OCEAN will set all their differences aside, that everyone will set their priorities right, that everyone will be spiritually revived unto a certain point that they will never fall behind or be spiritually low anymore, that everyone will grow with Your wisdom and understanding and will love You as You have loved them.

2008-06-15T05:57:00.000-07:00

i'm supposed to be like packing for camp tmr. but i just cant seem to bring myself to do it. I actually cant wait for camp. if its like the last camp in december, then i'm sure it'll be great. but apparently theres supposed to be less worship for this one and we'll concentrate on evangelism and having fun.

actually, i didnt want to go for this camp at first. but since i really really enjoyed the last camp, i was like maybe i should also go for this one. and since like almost all the fairsians are going, i probably should set a good example and go too. but now, to be honest, i am looking forward to this camp. even in the midst of all my homeowork (which i planned to but failed to do the week before), still i gotta set some time for God's work right? God help me. after the camp i'll probably be super stressed to finish up everything.

theres so much i want to expect from this camp. like a spiritual revival and all. hopefully a spiritual revival will happen. TTB needs a spiritual revival as a whole, and not just during special worship services. what good will it do if only a small portion of TTB is revived? what about the others? should we leave them in the dark? no! but then again, its not that those small groups of people should not be spiritually revived. i mean, if every week small groups in TTB have a spiritual revival then i'm sure pretty soon we'll have a united and happy TTB. but theres always a small percentage of passive christians..
Anyway. i hope too that there'll be people who are saved because of this camp, directly or indirectly. thats the main goal of the camp, isnt it?

Lord, i pray that the camp will be a success in Your eyes. No matter what it might turn out to be, no matter what happens, Lord i pray that your camp will turn out according to Your will and that it wil further Your kingdom and that Your glory will be shown and made known to everyone.

2008-06-13T08:41:00.000-07:00

I've had a preettty lousy week.
I never knew that you could be like that.
i've been trying extremely hard to start my homework
never. i never could have imagined
really... really.. hard.
i never thought that you would be that way
somehow i'm not in the mood
i never guessed you could be so selfish
and theres just too many distractions
so heartless
and projects
fine. ignore me.
and now i have camp next week
at least a notice?
the only progress on my homeowork has been research
wth?
and i've still got an entire book to read
and your reason?
yikes.. and a 1.5k word essay
rather than surprise me like that?
PLUS research
rather than suddenly ignoring me?
which i havent done much actually
what, is it my fault now?
and i'm still trying very hard to fight
oh, and youre busy?
the temptation to give opinions
too busy to at least say?
and points without proper evidence
i thought you were angry with me.
and somehow i've chosen the hard part to write
then i found out you werent.
for like the easiest topic
then why?
maybe i should like stop trying.
if you wanna throw away
it seems alot easier
years of friendship
and things still get done
WELL guess what.
and just forget about my goals
wish granted.
maybe its not what God had in mind for me after all?
goodbye.
who knows.. argh... its just too stressful..

2008-06-09T05:51:00.000-07:00

I've harboured thought about suicide for quite a long time. Its true. It would be especially significant during times when i feel extremely low and sad.

Today's post is about death.

I embrace death. Isnt death a time when the Lord calls us back to Him? I look forward to departing this world of doubts and conceit and lies. And yes i do have suicidal thoughts sometimes, even nowadays the temptation to just end my life is there. Its so easy. All i would have to do is jump off a sidewalk at the roads. Fling myself off the building. Cut my wrist with a sissors. Swallow something poisonous. Its really easy. But what stops me? Why am i still alive?

I don't find suicide worthwhile. Death does not equal suicide. The main reason for this is that suicide is a sin. Its a sin to kill, especially if its yourself. Argueably, suicide is a sin like stealing, lying, cursing and so on. So we'll be forgiven right? So we'll still go heaven right? So isn't it alright to commit suicide? In my opinion, commiting suicide doesnt really mean you'll go straight to hell. I dont think so. God's grace is still great. However, even if you still go heaven, and your life is revealed to you, will you regret it? Will you look down from heaven and look at the things you could have done, the people you could have saved, and lament that you didnt do it as youve selfishly ended your life before that? Imagine you regretting for eternity.
"that guy could have been saved"
" if i was around this wouldnt happen".

In fact, i have a ideal way of dying. I want my last breath to be a praise to God. When i lay dying, i want to sing a song to worship the Lord, with my very last breath. And i dont think its something i will regret doing. I might not be able to control how i enter this world, but i want to control how i leave. =D maybe its too idealistic. But no matter. i shall wait till im just about to die, and worship the Lord with my last breath.

And just for mood's sake, and for fun, i've decided to write a really short story.

He lay flat on the white hospital bed. His breathing heavy and barely making any movement, aside from the repeated strugglings to draw breath. His face was white, lips pale, eyes barely opened. But perhaps his eyes were barely opened due to his naturally small eyes. Or that he was trying to focus them to have a good look at the crowd of people solemnly looking at him from around his bed. Maybe his inability to focus his eyes properly at the solemn faces surrounding his bed was a good thing. He was unable to see the worried faces, the tearing eyes, the looks of those who are trying with all their might to not burst into tears and cry at the top of their voices. There was barely a sound in the room. No sound of chirping birds from the other side of the nearby window, no sound of shuffling feet, no sound of any electronic gadgets anywhere. He felt weak, too weak to move or to talk. Even keeping his eyes open and focused seemed to take up all his strength. He knew that his Time was coming soon. Even in such a weakened state, he felt himself getting weaker and weaker and the minutes passed. His limps seemed like it weighed a ton, his chest felt heavier and heavier. He struggled to keep his mind into sentinence, to keep conscious during the last minutes of his life. His parents were gripping his hands extremely tightly. Everyone knew that his time was almost up. One by one, they each muttered something encouraging into his ear. It was like their farewell gift to him, before he departed from this world. No one expected a reply from him. He stopped talking months ago, as his voicebox collapsed and he had no energy to say words out. But it didn't matter anymore. There was a pastor to his left, reading out verses from the bible and comforting him. He was a christian all his life, and was quite a devoted one. But now times were tough. Does God really exist, now that he was suffering? He felt his consciousness fading. He knew he had a few seconds left. What was there to do? Maybe he should wait patiently for the inevitable. He imagined a digital clock counting down.
10... How?
9... What can he do?
8... What was there to do?
7... Perhaps he should say goodbye?
6... Tell his parents he loves them?
5... Or perhaps...
With the last of his energy, he tried singing in a croaky voice. The words were barely audible but somewhat understandable.
" And when the earth fades,
Falls from my eyes,
And You stand before me,
I know You love me,
I know You love me. "

But there was no doubt that it was beautiful.

2008-06-08T09:55:00.000-07:00

I see a near revival
Stirring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees
We're on our knees

That was what i saw today, as well as yesterday. It was worship night for TTB youths. And it was amazing. So far, i find normal TTB services generally rather err... would dead be the word? Okay theres people singing and clapping and praising and worshipping wholeheartedly, but it isnt like the entire congregation was doing it, but only like a few here and the and a few groups of people. The rest would be quite stoned, i find. Well, God was moving in the worship hall for these 2 days. The presence of God surely could have been felt by everyone, i daresay. For the first time, its not pockets in the congregation, but most of the congregation would be worshipping wholeheartedly. Its a very wierd feeling, when everyone around you is also on their knees or raising their hands in worship and singing praises to God. Its like the congregation was ALIVE. and the presence of God could be felt in the hall. I strongly encourage everyone to attend worship night. it was a great spiritual revival for me after a long time of lows and passiveness.

Looking back, i've actually spent alot of time on worship during this weekend. After saturday's worship night, edmund and leroy came over to stay at my place. During the night, we sang worship songs while leroy played the guitar. In the morning we went for the usual TTB service. and went for worship night again in the night. i think the only other time i've ever done so much worship was during the tackle camp! =D But it seems that no matter how many times i've done it, i'm never sick of worshipping the Lord, and the joy that comes while worshipping. Lets see if i ever can be sick from worshipping! =D

I pray, Lord, for a spiritual revival in not just those who went for the worship night, but also in the whole TTB. That everyone would hunger and thirst for your spirit and your word. And from there, the whole church too will be revived and we'll be a growing church with loving and devoted members who will go on to make a difference the community and the nation and the world, all for the glory of God. Amen.

2008-06-05T07:50:00.000-07:00

How will I die? Your Result: You will die in a car accident. Please, continue to buckle up, and try not to speed. More likely than not, it will happen very randomly and quickly. Occasionally, this result stands for death in a plane crash. Do not fear transportation. Avoid becoming a hermit, you cannot escape fate.
You will die in a nuclear holocaust.
You will die of boredom.
You will die while saving someone's life.
You will die from a terminal illness.
You will die in your sleep.
You will die while having sex.
You will be murdered.
How will I die? Create a Quiz

Interesting thing i found on leroy's blog. haha... okay well the holidays are fine i guess.. just that for some reason its passing by super fast. I sent my laptop for repair.. the camera and speakers couldnt work due to installing of vista SP 1.. haha ... but apparently now i gotta reformat them cos the technician cant fix it.. argh... but apparently i had important files so i gotta reformat them myself. so now i gotta go back helpdesk and reinstall everything. argh.

I'm super bored. on the phone now with a certain special girl . =D Naa... shes just a really good friend and has been a good friend even though i dont know her for very long. its amazing how we are able to get along so well, in this small small small small world where her best friend happens to be my childhood friend. HAHA! i guess thats why both of us can talk =D . I duno i guess we both can realy talk alot alot and like crazily. haha. okay shes just a really really good friend and theres nothing romantic between us =D and shes taller than me so yea. hahaha like WAYYyy taller. =D haha..

well i found a way to kill time during holidays!! now i dont have to start playing wow again.. haha...

2008-06-01T09:09:00.000-07:00

As we come into your house
And as we gather in your name
Its a privilege to be here
We're so very glad we came

Today, for some wierd reason, these lyrics came into my mind. They are from the song "sacrifice of praise". Somehow these lyrics meant alot to me today. just from these few simple words, i believe it talks about the joy of worship. For me, though i know worship is not supposed to be for our enjoyment, i find that somehow though it is for God, i get extreme joy from it. Joy, not happiness, mind you. theres a difference =D. Somehow, the feeling i get while worshipping is INDESCRIBABLE. but being a stubborn person, i'm gona try to describe it, for memory's sake, if i ever forget the joy of worship. Its a mixed feeling of gratitude, fulfillment and peace. When worshipping, isnt it an act of gratitude to God? Why do we worship Him? cos we love Him. Why do we love Him? Cos He first loved us, and He has done many awesome and wonderful things in my life, so many that it becomes a much (uncountable) and that without Him i might be lost and dead somewhere in my walk of life. GOD SAVED ME! What is the least i can do? Love Him. And thats just about the beginning of everything.

Fulfillment. Why do i feel fulfilled? Well, have you ever had a dream, and when you actually complete it in real life, you feel that sense of fulfillment? Well, i know one of my purposes in life is to worship God. It is like working extremely hard to do something all your life and when you finally do it, you get that sense of fulfillment. Similarly, since everything is devoted to God, when i worship Him, its like one more step that i take to get closer to Him. And also since my life is devoted to worshipping Him, then i guess its that feeling over and over again each time i worship Him =D.

Why peace? When i worship God, i am once again reminded of all the things He has done for me. It reminds me and prompts me that God is bigger than every sickness, than every circumstance, than every problem, suffering, hardship, pain, hurts, evil and EVERYTHING. God is amazing, forever. Therefore, if God is my shelter, then who or what would dare to bother me? I forget every problem and every worry that i might have had before the service. They no longer bug me. Whats greater than God? Who can stand up to Him? and this feeling of peace is not like the kind you get after you complete your o levels or whatever. Its even better. Its like... hard to describe... but every single muscle in my body would suddenly feel refreshed and relaxed.every singlee one. even my brain. for some reason, its like all the pressure and thoughts in my brain would disappear, and all i am thinking of is the words of the song i am singing to God. my eyes close, breathing slows down to a pace similar to when asleep. and if i wasnt singing, i'm pretty sure i would let out a long and satisfied "ahhhh". like waking up on a good day extremely refreshed one morning without a care in the world, only like millions of times better.
Thus concludes my thoughts for the day.

Tomorrow (or rahter today) is my 2 common tests. after that i'll be going out to watch prince caspian with my friends.. at this time.... i feel that i have to be grateful to God for many things. I've taken no liberty to list down a few.

Thank you, God, for church. A place where i can feel secure and where all the worries of life just seem to fade away. Where i grew up, where so many memories come from and where i've made lifelong friends whom i cherish dearly.
Thank you God, for The TackleBox. It is a place where i have grown alot spiritually, emotionally and mentally. Where i found the joy in worshipping and serving You.
Thank you, God, for my cell group. Somehow, my cell group is always able to balance humour and serious things. Always can count on them to never make cell groups boring, but yet learn about indepth things.
Thank you, God, for Deborah. She always remains enthusiatic and keeps the group in check during lessons. Making sure we are always listening and everything. i'll never forget her for her important leadership role during the mission trip and her testimony that she shared during it.
Thank you, God, for Winnie. I always see her smiling and for some reason her smiles are contagious. I know not why. And shes a geographer! =D
Thank you, God, for Desmond. I find that he is very knowledgeable in everything he teaches. And he knows alot about the bible and bible knowledge too. And he reads about them alot. and widely.
Thank you, God, for Teresa. She has always been like a motherly figure in our cell group. And she took great care of the sick when we were in Thailand during the mission trip. And she is always able to keep the class lively and interesting.
Thank you, God, for Jane. She has always been a super friendly group leader, always very enthu and happy =D. I think she an extremely strong person, having to have stayed over at the Thai airport for 1 entire day with joel during the mission trip.
Thank you, God, for Timothy. Its good to have a fellow group leader around that likes to game as much as i do =D. and he is also learning psychology with me! I'll remember him during the mission trip for falling ill at around the same time as me. In fact i still think that i spread it to him.. XD
Thank you, God, for Alvin. He has always been a funny guy. Great sense of humour, and good at making funny faces. i'll remember him for that line " so what if we're worshipping in a different language" during the mission trip. it struck me greatly, and it still does.
Thank you, God, for Jasmine. She has this lively and enthusiatic attitude that keeps up the spirit in the group, no matter how low it is. I remember her for during the mission trip doing that wierd thing that ended with a wink and a "ahh" that the girls were mostly trying to do. i still have no idea how they do that XD. And, she plays dota =D
Thank you, God, for Michelle. I miss her funny personality and liveliness, especially during the mission trip. She is also a fellow gamer ( she plays WOW!) and i really miss her jokes and laughter! =D i'll always remember the time during the mission trip when we all went looking for nicolas, thinking that he was lost...
Thank you, God, for Ian. I miss him too! I miss the times when he would go indepth onto everything and would get us thinking alot! How from something simple, he can draw out many meanings and links. I'll remember him for when we went through The Lord's Prayer and he really went and dug up the meaning of almost every word!
Thank you, God, for MingHui. Though he didnt really teach our group, but he joined us in our mission trip. Honestly, i look up to him alot. I find that he is very spiritual and funny and a good leader. And he can sing well =D. I'll remember him for playing soccer with us during the mission trip.. hes really good!
Thank you, God, for Bun Min. He too, is a gamer. At the times when he visits the classes, he is always able ask interesting questions that makes us think extremely hard! =D Really makes us think and wonder... and he is able to explain things clearly using an analogy, that makes the most complicated things seem extremely easy.
Thank you, God, for Justin. Though he isnt teaching us anymore, i miss him teaching me when i was in secondary 1! He built up my foundations on the Word of God. He also organised soccer games for us to destress on during the sec 3 and 4 years, when times were stressful. I'll always remember him for the times he taught me during secondary 1...

This is all i'm going to type out for today. fatigue is killing me and tomorrow i've still got 2 common tests... i will continue the rest the next day. so far i believe i've covered the group leaders.. if i missed out any i guess i'll type them out in the morning. I thank God for them, as the cell group leaders have played an important part in my life, nurturing me and making OCEAN into what it is today- from a small group, to a super mega huge one! =D

2008-05-31T06:22:00.000-07:00

Its been more than a month in poly.
What say me?

Well, i wont deny that i am enjoying myself. The friends i've made in poly are great. My class is great, and extremely bubbly, noisy and united. Kind of reminds me of 4B. Now that i've mentioned it, i miss 4B terribly. I miss the group of us guys breaking the rules, going wild in school, soccer, dota, ali bomb, b***** sprint, the uniform, the class spirit, and everything that we went through in 2 years. not that my current class isnt great, it is amazing, better than anything i would have hoped for. But i miss the carefree environment in 4B. In fact i think thats the biggest difference ever. 1A01 has the great immense pressure to study and finish all the homework and do well, and i'm with people who did super well and better than me for o levels... whereas in 4B there was so little pressure to study that i practically am studying more in 1 month than i have in my 4 years in fmss. the wierd thing i find about poly life is that usually assignment weeks are super stress, but right after you hand in the assignments theres like absolutely nothing to do for a short while. Feels very wierd. >.<

above all, my prayers has been answered.

I prayed for christian friends in poly. all the while i was afraid that the culture would be way too different for me to handle, as i would suddenly not be in a christian school since forever. Well, thank God that my class has quite a few christians.. and that some of my lecturers are christian.. in fact i think about half of my lecturers are christian.. at least i know 2 are..but the 3rd one i suspect only XD. whats more, i joined YFC in NP, so i get to meet a few more christians around NP from different years and courses. And we meet every friday for prayer and campus evangelism on alternate fridays.

And i'm somehow in tennis too. For some wierd reason the coach saw something in me and asked me to come for thursdays trainings. He must be feeling random. anyway i go for tennis on thursdays and fridays now, thurdays for training and fridays so that alden doesnt get lonely =P. well im in Hearing Impaired club too.. i find HI club's classes like.. more united... haha.. cos its a small class but we dont really talk to each other.. we learn sign language too.. and thats quite cool XD

i've been feeling down lately... i dont know exactly why.. i guess it must be cos of the buildup of emotions for the past few weeks.
somehow, my feelings are telling me something, but God seems to want me to do something else. Even though how sure i may be, for some reason something is preventing me from actually carrying it out. maybe somethings arent meant to be, maybe i'm never supposed to attain that happiness. Maybe God has something better or has His own plan for me, but part of me refuses to accept that fate. Part of me wants to go against God's will, for something i really want to achieve. I guess all i can do is pray more and that God might somehow change His mind, or that i can finally let go.

2007-12-31T10:39:00.000-08:00

okay.. mission trip was great.. i cant believe it ended... well.. if i hadnt fallen sick i would wish the mission trip was longer! =) I blogged abt this mission trip through my thoughts, feelings and reflections, so its always best to read others' mission trip post as everyone learnt different things and had different thoughts. Thus, it seems to have me alot inside as i only blogged abt things that affected me somehow, or got me thinking.

December 26, Day 1: Things went pretty much smoothly until we reached the airport at Bangkok. Well, apparently there was a mistake and 5 people had tickets for the next day at the same time (7.45pm i tink). i forgot who those 5 were though... well anyway after finding this out we broke into groups of 3-5 people and began to pray in the airport. It must have looked wierd and we tried our best to look like we werent praying but was obviously super hard to do. Well, i honestly felt that God was already testing us on our faith on the first day. We havent even reached our destination and yet we had met with trouble. At that time, i really believed that God would grant us the 5 tickets and trusted in him alot. But alas, only 3 tickets were available. So 2 people were left behind, Jane and Joel. Well, that got me thinking and it was only during debrief that made me wonder if i was trusting God for the right reasons. Should i be trusting God that He will grant us the 5 seats? Or that God's will be done and that He had a reason for everything and this was His will? Upon arrival at the hostel, we unpacked and had debrief. We were then allocated time slots to pray for Jane and Joel's safety all the way until morning.

December 27, Day 2: I woke up late that morning, just around 10 minutes before the time we were suppossed to gather. Well, i had an okay sleep. The beds were quite comfortable and no one snored i think. I was so thankful for the hot water shower ( though only 1 cubicle had it), a bed, blankets, pillow, big bunks, water etc. We had morning devotion and prayed for Jane and Joel again. We had breakfast then left for our missions work. Our first assignment was a school. I daresay that school was as big as dover road. It was huge with many ponds and buildings and lots of open space. We did a mime for the 14 year old students there, as well as taught them some action songs, games, and did the beads thing for them. I was quite touched at their attentiveness and enthusiasm at the beads and songs. however, the games did not really go smoothly due to the language barrier, but i tink that they enjoyed it nevertheless. They were extremely attentive during the beads thing and even some people not in our target group joined in the activity. This encouraged me greatly. After that, the girl students wanted to take a picture with timothy as they thought he looked like harry potter. that made us all suddenly notice that he really did!( or it could be just me suddenly noticing) Well that got us all laughing.
We left the school for another school. Our target group was much younger children this time. we did games and a mime and we werent allowed to use evangelistic materials there. This school was quite cool. They had this stage on the field and seemed to be celebrating some occasion ( which turned out they were opening their new block of classrooms). After that, we gave them balloons.

Reflecting upon that day, it really touched me greatly to see how simple gifts like balloons and shirts and pencils can put such wide and sincere smiles on all their faces. Honestly speaking, if it was in Singapore, i am sure that our country's children would not be as thankful. Their attentiveness and eagerness to learn and listen to what we have to say, and their enthusiasm in our activities also made me extremely happy. Even when we were playing "childish games" like chop chilli chop with the 14 year old students, they played along, in which case should it be our country's 14 year old students, they will most likely give that "sian diao" face and not participate. Oh and there was a blackout in the night on that day, thus no electricity and water. 2 people, one boy and one girl, (remains annonymous due to embarrasing situation) were stuck in the toilets halfway while bathing and we had to carry water to them to get rid of the soap. When the girl was out, the boy was still stuck as we brought water to her first. Apparently she felt sorry for using up 7 water bottles of water and wanted to apologise to him while he was still in the boys toilet. no one stopped her apparently and upon entering the toilet, she walked in on us powder bathing and ran out embarrased. Luckily we had debrief before the blackout occurred. well, i powder bathed with alden and went to sleep. after about 5-10 mins later, the power came back and we all rushed to bathe. After bathing, just when we were about to sleep, Joel and Jane reached the hostel. We ran down to welcome them and joked about how well both of them would have gotten to know each other alot better, having spent 24 hours at the airport with each other. Eventful 2nd day. Oh and i almost forgot to mention that for some reason, when packing for the mission trip, i packed 2 torchlights. I had this wierd feeling to pack 2 torchlights and well, i guess that it was God speaking to me. I used both torchlights that night, one for the guy to use while he was stuck in the toilet and another was for me walk around while calling for water and keeping that guy company. oh and i packed exactly four extra batteries. Those batteries proved useful when my first torchlight ran out of battery and it required 4 batteries. Wow, huh... How God really speaks to us and tells us to do some wierd things, and that amazing feeling when you understand why we had to do those things when the events that call for it take place. I guess i really felt thankful for God's instructions.

December 28, Day 3: Some of our members already started to feel a little ill. Well, that didnt stop us in our missions work though. We left for another school today, this time in a little more rural area. The ride was super bumpy, but we kinda killed away the bumpiness by singing songs. A great time for bonding, the travelling was. Well, now that Jane and Joel was finally with us, we had a full number of 25 people and just for fun we decided to number off for the euphoria of having 25 people. The children at this school were rather shy and stoned at first. This was most likely due to the language barrier, which was actually the biggest problem i felt we faced throughout the trip. its like i really wanna talk and play with them but we just dont know how to say it. Luckily we had Jane around this time, as she held the cds containing the songs for the puppet show. When i ran to the cd player my jaw dropped. Firstly, im not critisizing but i have never heard of the brand of the player before, which made me unable to know whether it was able to read the cd file format. so when it couldnt read, i panicked. anyway, it started playing after a while, but there was no sound. i checked the cables' connections but it doesnt seem to work. Panicked more. stopped the cd player and replayed the disc. the player hanged. great. Tried plan B, which was using a tape instead of a CD to play. No tape player. Excellent. Panicked more. The children was getting restless and poor alvin was trying his best to entertain them. I thank God that someone suggested using the player in the van and blasting the speakers. I tried that immediately, however, secretly doubting in my heart that it would be able to play loud enough for the children to hear. When i played the CD in the van, the sound was decently loud. Apparently the van had 2 subspeakers behind the driver's seat and those 2 speakers could blast music. Think all things are done for a reason? Well, from then on i did. The song played sucessfully and the children were extremely attentive and amused. From then on, we saw a change of character. It seemed that those kids suddenly woke up and became excited. I guess they really enjoyed the puppet show. Well, we used the beads to preach again, but this time i felt that the beads was not as effective as the first school as this time the target group was much younger. I felt that the children would not be able to understand what we were trying to do and would rather play with the beads instead of grasping the message behind it. But hey, how would i know how much it actually impacted them? only ONE being ( or three, if you would prefer ) would really know how this would impact them. So, i shall not complain.
After we left that school, we went to visit a hill tribe known as the yellow leaf. first thing that i thought of was naruto. okay im lame. anyway the route there was super bumpy. and infact, the village was located on a really steep hill, and the van didnt have enough power to go up the hill ( we needed the van to play the puppet song, so must be like near the shelter we were performing ) thus, some of us had to push the van. well, it was actually quite scary, as the van was actually rolling backwards towards us, so if we let go we'll probably be crushed (esp me since i was the smallest & weakest boy there XD ) We did it finally after much perspiration though. the place was extremely dusty, and for some reason my eye swelled pretty badly. oh yea my eye was swelling on the 27th already, but swelled somemore on the 28th. Well, once again, thank God alden brought eyedrops. God really did provide alot for us. I dont think God wanted me to suffer for no reason, (okay its not really suffering it was quite minor i tink i dont know why everyone kept worrying abt me) but i think God was trying to tell us to trust in him to provide. when i got the swelling eye thingy i didnt think anyone would bring eyedrops for this trip ( well, who would expect their eye to swell???) but for some reason alden had them. WOOHOO!!!! i was so thankful that he had them. maybe God spoke to him while packing for the trip? i dont know, perhaps. i was so happy, really. Well, enough about me. When doing the action songs, i felt that the children here were rather shy. it was quite obvious by the way they ignore us when we try to speak to them in thai and by the way they actually avoid us when we approach them. when we moved closer, they moved backwards, like we were diseased or something. well, they must have been frightened. i mean, who wouldnt? we kept persisting and did the puppet show. it seemed that they warmed up slightly, to the extent that they did not move backwards when we walked to them. but they still didnt reply us when we talked to them. Okay, RESILIENCE! so we proceeded to give out some gifts to them. They werent very sure of whether to accept them though. It looked like they were still unsure of whether to trust us. Alvin really pointed out much later that they really warmed up when we presented gifts to their village elder (which was actually ACS clothes). When they saw their elder put on the clothes, it was really noticeable that they warmed up to us greatly. they began to accept our gifts with grateful eyes and smiles and were much more attentive and responsive. well, once again, simple gifts like second hand clothes were able to put such big smiles on their faces. each time when you present the gifts to them, and the way they smile at you and thank you, and the sight of their genuine gratefulness in their eyes, it really warms your heart greatly. many people have talked about this feeling and tried to describe it, but i personally feel that you cant actually imagine it, but you really have to experience it to understand it fully. It is really an extremely wonderful feeling, hard to forget, and impossible to imagine until youve experienced it. the children there sang a song, complete with actions for us, which i think were extremely cute. it really touched me greatly and cheered us all up. apparently, i finally noticed that they were mostly christians. and the song that they sang was a christian song. Well, we took pictures and walked around the village after that, visiting a house to see their way of life and such. We walked down the steep slope and at the bottom of the slope was like a corn graveyard. seriously. piles and piles of the corn stalks ( you know, when you eat the corn, theres this yellow stalk thing which you throw away) littering the ground and in fact covering the entire ground. that village must really love corn. anyway nearby was a lot of huge bulls, which i think apparently should be the villagers' livestock or smth. well, they were extremely huge, maybe like 5 times marcus' size or more even, and really really smelly. someone mistook them for pigs at first, which i think was probably due to the smell ( both animals smelled pretty much the same ). and we headed back to the hostel. bumpy ride again.

When we reached, we rested for a while, then some of us played games with the kids at the hostel. well, okay mainly some of the guys played soccer and the other boys and the girls played some other games. Since i played soccer, i cant remember what the others played. i think it was like poison ball or something though. anyway, the thai people were extremely good at soccer. their ball control was super good and outdribbled everyone. probably only alden could dribble as well as them. well, we kinda won though, which i tink was obviously cos they gave us chance and let us win. well, had debrief and dinner and all. oh and some of us began to fall ill too.

December 29, Day 4: Well, we woke up early and did our morning devotions as usual. Today we woke up extremely early (like around 6.30 we were supposed to meet i think). And, as usual, i woke up at the last 5 mins and rushed to brush my teeth and ran down for devotions. Well, that day was like suppossed to be the BIG day. THE day for the main performances and all. Well our first activity was, if i remember correctly, we held a small performance for the children at the hostel. Well, we did action songs and games and if i remember correctly the coloured rope evangelistic materials. i cant remember what they used as right after leading the action songs, just when the last song finished, nick ran out with a nose bleed and followed him out to take care of him. And that kept me busy throughout that time. when i returned the evangelism thing was over and they were about to do the puppet show. Ahem. Because of the nosebleed incident i forgot to take the CD for the puppet show. thus there was a slight delay for the music to come up. Really! (looks with pitiful puppy dog look) anyway i ran up to the bunk without wearing my shoes ( had to run across this rocky ground, followed by sandy ground, then grassy ground ) and flew down with the CD. well the puppet show went on and there was more sharing and testimonies. After that, we played games like blow wind blow. It was wierd playing that as well firstly there wasnt much to call out ( almost everyone was male, wearing the same coloured shirts/pants ) and apparently the thailand children dont wear spectacles. So you can imagine how hard it is to call out a particular characteristic which didnt make everyone run or make too little people run. Also, we had to wait for the translator to translate it to us before we move to ensure fairness. Nevertheless, it was still extremely fun. Took away all of my morning fatigue. Well there was this caucasion guy who got stuck 3 times and had to do a forfeit, the chicken dance. while he was trying to do that Ariel suddenly stood up and volunteered to show him how to do it. thats the first time i see someone so eager to do forfeit :P. After that i think we went to play soccer with some of the thai kids. The grass we played on was extremely slippery and wet, so we got mud all over our shoes and were quite wet after that. Those thai kids really could play soccer very well. their ball control ( even those like around 6 years old) could dribble extremely well and control the ball. So even with the huge age gap, it was more or less even. We mixed up the teams though, so its not thailand vs singapore. we divided the singaporeans into 2 groups and the thai children into 2 groups and combined the groups to be like thai+singapore 1 vs thai+singapore 2 that kind. basically divided ourselves and played opposing sides. yea well anyway after that we seperated ourselves into 4 groups for the games. we were suppossed to help/play the games with the children. Soccer, captains ball, supatakral ( duno how to spell ) and volleyball. Well, i wanted to join soccer but i heard that they needed help taking care of the kids in the drawing/colouring competition so i went there to "help". couldnt do much, those kids could draw much better than me and colour much better than me, and they pretty much know what to do and what to draw, so i just walked around and tried a little bit of colouring and drawing myself XD. just for fun. Well then garry called us asking for people to play soccer. so i joined in with alden. i kind of forgot the team, but mainly alden played every position, garry played forward, bill in defence, and i was keeper and i forgot who else played. bad memory XD anyway we played well the first half, after which the score was still 0 to 0. only after the second half when we werent as careful or aggressive. well the second half i had no defenders and the end score was like 3-1. LOL. we got owned. anyway the thai people were good, so no regrets! =D
after that we took photos and kind of slacked the whole time until like the event was over, buying snacks and food and drinks and enjoying them.it was like my first cup of coke after soooo long!! XD anyway the snacks were fantastic! at first i was a bit scared to buy due to hygiene issues. there was alot of flies on the food. so i used the "test of time" for the sausages and at first bought the first batch that came fresh from the frying. i tried one and was like. OHHHH MANNN ITSSS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!! then i bought the cold ones. (the ones exposed to flies for a long long time. i didnt care abt food poisoning la. it was really good. really! anyway i didnt get food poisoning i think. well there was also these cold foods kept in this transparent freezer box, where after you choose the ones you want they fry it in oil. it was REALLY GOOD! but they kind of all taste the same, whether it was luncheon meat or meatballs. but still good anyway =). anyway after that i tried some white egg-like pastry.i think it was like coconut milk and egg white thingy, with corn and stuff in the center. it really looks like eggs anyway, and it was suuuper good! and its free!!!! hahahaha!! i went crazy there lorrr.... lunch also had those things as side dishes. GOOD!!! anyway we went as a big group and went to some place near this throw the metal ball as close to the rubber ball game and started dancing to the techno music played on the huge speakers. quite cool. they remixed songs like my humps and fergielicious and dragostea din tei and stuff. danced those old disco and stuff. anyhow dance in a circle one. lol... i bet there was alot of people staring and wondering who those crazy people were (us!!). haha... and well.. after that we kind of had debrief. we had debrief early as it was most likely that throughout the night we would be too busy or would end too late to have a debrief. It was the usual debrief and we headed out to see everyone already gathered and preparing to start their event. we took the stuff we needed down to the eating area and some of us went through what we had to do for the musical, puppetshow and mime. we started off with the puppet show, then had quite a long break before the next puppet show, then followed by the mime, then the musical. i cant really remember which came first, the musical or the mime, but i tink it was the mime first. anyway i guess we tried our best, despite the stoned audience. the attendance was like about 500 plus people but it was really scary to see all of them so stoned. i guess it must be because of the language barrier that makes it hard for them to understand, and having a narrator and a translator makes it not as smooth as if we just did it in english. but hey we still tried our best, and prayed as a group before each event, which really suprised me to see our whole group so united in prayer. Before each event, we gathered as a group to pray that our acts would be able to touch the lives of the people. we just had to suggest to pray and everyone would immediately huddle in a group and pray together. it really touched me that everyone was so united and willing to pray together and no one complained that we were praying so often. ( there was no like "again?!" or "huh??!" ). After that, deborah shared her testimony and we sat below the stage listening to her and praying for her while she spoke. looking back, well, i cant really tell if anyone was touched that night, or if we really made any changes on that day. the crowd was really extremely unresponsive and stoned. but then again, i would be judging to say that no one was changed. i am sure that somehow, somewhere in the crowd, someone felt extremely touched and is interested to know more about christianity. what us humans see is only their outside response, and are unable to tell how much our performance has impacted them. only God knows, and would reveal the seeds not to us perhaps, but to some other people for the harvest. Anyway, after deb's testimony, we didnt do much but went back to our bunks, slacked outside and made balloons for the little children. once again, even simple things like balloons making the children so happy really warmed my heart. its that feeling you get when after sculpting the balloon, then giving it to the child, seeing his/her warm smile and hearing them say thank you, then immediately playing with it and looking so extremely happy, thats really addictive and this feeling alone makes you want to do more for them. well after that we all kind of went to sleep when the event ended ( we couldnt sleep while it was on as it was super noisy...).

Okay, here is why nick and i were laughing so hard on that day. ( i forgot which day it was, so im gona blog it on this day) Firstly, earlier in the afternoon, nick needed to use the toilet, so he used the first toilet. after that, he found that the toilet got stuck. i tried to help him flush the toilet but it was still stuck. so we kept trying to flush the toilet every few minutes. apparently we were rather panicky as that was the only toilet with the hot water. so towards the evening we tried again and again. then someone suggested filling up the back of the toilet bowl ( the part where the water for flushing is stored ) with water before flushing. so we used the hose and filled it to the brim, and pressed the flush button. we flushed until the water was at about 3/4 left, then waited a while, then being paranoid that it was not enough, we pressed and held it on. apparently when there was like 1/4 water left, water suddenly splashed onto our legs. looking down, the toilet bowl was overflowing ( we left the toilet seat cover on, luckily, as we didnt want to see the contents inside) with water and splashing onto the floor. both of us ran out of the cubicle laughing and cursing ( oh shit! what the shit! what the hey and so on, not so vulgar :P ) and due to the series of unfortunate events that nick and i have gone through, ( honestly whatever unfortunate events nick went through, for some reason i was always nearby... maybe i was his bad luck charm or something..lol... ) we kind of like were laughing at our bad luck and rolling on the floor and crawling to our bunk bedrooom. we were laughing so dam hard ( nick's face was really really red ) and my stomach hurt after that. and we were still laughing when we went back to the cubicle thinking we had to clean the shit off the floor. when we went back to the cubicle, we kind of went "YESS!!!" at the same time, as there was no shit on the floor ( whew! ) but just in case, we used the hose to flush the floor. then we lifted the toilet seat cover and the toilet was unstuck. there was no more shit stuck inside. both of us ( who were still laughing and smiling non stop since the flush incident ) roared with laughter and went like " THANK GOD!!! REALLY THANK GOD!!!! NOW WE DONT HAVE TO BATHE IN A SMELLY TOILET!!!! AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!" so apparently the girls in their bunk heard us laughing and wondered what happened, while the guys were all heaving sighs of reliefs. at that time, none of our toilets were stuck. but if i am correct the girls toilets were like almost all stuck and choked already. haha. suay la.. that their bunk's toilets not working.

December 30, Day 5: Today was suppossed to be our R&R day. well, we woke up early for a church service at the hostel we were staying in. it was quite cool, and their music was quite modern ( electric guitar, drums, bass ), not like what i expected. honestly, i expected them to have like the traditional service like that. singing hymns and all.... but i guess their youths, also, being youths, like us, being youths, love the more modern songs and more upbeat songs. well, i cldnt recognise the first song they sang. but it was kind of cute. we didnt know the lyrics but tried to sing along anyway. ( its like what we've been doing all the while, just that now we were the audience. at that time, i noticed why some people were so stoned when we were performing. apparently they didnt understand us much, just like at the service where we couldnt understand them. ) anyway we tried following their actions and singing along. it was only at the second song that we recognised it. it was " therefore being justified by faith". i think that was the title... im not sure.. i just know the lyrics.. lol.. its the chewy chewy chewy chewy oom papa.. ai yai ya yai yai ya ya song... well when they sang it in thai, we sang it in english. apparently we also did our version of actions for this song, as the guy leading the actions were doing totally different things from us. he looked quite shocked to see us singing different lyrics and doing different actions. well there was another song, which i forgot the title... in fact the rest of the songs they sang we recognised them. at that time, a passage from the bible struck me. it was Acts 2, where the Holy Spirit gave the church the gift of tongues and everyone understood each other even though they spoke different languages. they were able to hear each other speak in their own languages even though they all speak different languages. well.. that got me thinking... isnt that incident somewhat similar with what happened at that time? well i duno. somehow it struck me that it was similar. i dont know why, but that incident when we were all praising God in different languages somehow touched me alot. aside from it being kind of fun, i felt a presence around in that hall. like somehow i knew the Holy Spirit was at work and the language barrier was removed and troubles and fears and worries were removed. and for some reason i could understand what they were saying. (well we knew the lyrics to the song, just that in a different language ). after that, i forgot who said that he found it wierd and difficult to understand or to worship and learn cos of the different language. or he said something like that. That was when Alvin said something that really got me thinking- so what if we did not understand? we still were, and is/are worshipping the same God. and God isnt limited in languages. He CREATED LANGUAGE! He created everything. Does it really matter if we didnt understand what we were singing/praying? NO! all that matters is that will and want to worship Him and praise Him and honor Him and glorify Him and so on. it doesnt really matter what language you do it in, as in the end, He still understands, He knows, and He is still pleased. it still is worshipping and praying no matter what language you do it in. just make sure your heart and soul is in it. that touched my heart greatly, and actually encouraged me to try to sing even those songs in thai, and pray in thai even though i didnt understand what they were saying. well, after this service we went to another at a church. this church at first looked like a church on stilts. (picture a kampung church) anyway it really resembled a church except that it was elevated above the ground like a kampung houses. the whole church was made of wood and was simple, with just a sanctuary. no classrooms or board rooms or function rooms. it really shows me how simple things can be to worship God. how with just these, they are able to learn about God as much as we do, and praise him in much simpler environments, without needing electric guitars and drums and all. The only musical instrument they had was the electric piano. and there was no lead singer plus backup singer plus bassist or whatever. just the piano and someone leading worship. well, to be honest, i felt kind of restless and impatient during the sermon. this time the sermon was long, and being unable to understand at all, i lost focus and fell asleep many times. thats when i took out the muesli bar and ate it to keep awake, sharing it with the others falling asleep. i felt that it was not polite to fall asleep during it as, being guests, would seem very very rude. after that they gave out some christmas presents and prizes and we had lunch in the church. there was some chilli pork thing ( FINALLY SOMETHING SPICY!!! ) and sticky rice and soup and drinks and cabbage. it was quite nice and simple. the sticky rice tasted quite different from the normal japanese sticky rice. and dipped into the chilli, it tasted REALLY good. i kind of really enjoyed the chilli and ate the whole bowl. well, thats what happens if you dont eat chilli for so many days. haha. i was desperate for something spicy! anyway i tink i fell sick because of the chilli. but i ate more last time and nth happened. oh well, no matter. it was worth it. i think. haha. anyway after that we left for the city area and went shopping in a shopping centre place. i couldnt find anything to buy there though. i was hoping for a adidas shop to buy some stuff... lol.. but i had to buy a shirt as i was running out of shirts. well anyway we walked around without buying anything ( wait.. some people bought drinks... does that count? ). we walked around in small groups of around 7 people and wandered around. i stuck with minghui to get him to bargain for us if we wanted to buy anthing :P after that we walked out of the shopping center and went to this "pasar malam" place. ( but it was in the morning, so i guess just pasar XD ) from there, we spotted a seven eleven. LOL! we choinged there immediately to buy snacks. over there we met like the whole group ( it seemed to be the whole group, but in the end we were wrong =P ) and i bought lots of snacks. lots and lots. i bought ice cream and chocolate and chips, and ate the ice cream immediately. ( now that i think about it, i tink the ice cream made me ill. i felt a little nauseous while eating it ) we walked to this noodle stall where deb wanted us to try, saying that it was very nice. well... i didnt sit down to eat. the bradwurst looked extremely good and i was abt to buy it. lol.. but then, michelle i think, started asking around where her brother was. then i looked around for him. ( thats why i said it seemed like the whole group. ) apparently no one saw him at seven eleven either. uh oh... nick's super eventful week. lol. well thats when we tried to recall when we last saw him. apparently they last saw him at the shopping center. okay. we formed a small search party to look for him while the rest sat down to eat. haha. and off we went, back to the shopping center. we retraced our steps around the place trying to find nick. we even went to the van to look and see if nick was waiting there. still no sign of him. michelle kept trying to call teresa and jasmine, hoping that he would be with them. ( there were also not at seven eleven and not with the eating group ) but neither of them picked up their phone. thats when michelle started to panic. apparently she was thinking of all the extremes of what could have happened to nick. well i was also feeling afraid that something bad might happen to him. alot of bad and unfortunate things happened to nick during the trip already and well, i was hoping that nothing else that was bad would happen to him. so okay we were walking around the shopping center again, when we spotted a familiar hairstyle bobbing up and down in the crowd. NICK!!!! and he was quite tall la... so it was easier to spot him. we ran to him and saw him with teresa and jasmine and were extremely relieved. whew.. apparently we lost him at the second level of the shopping center (before leaving for seven eleven ) and saw teresa and jasmine shopping and followed them instead ) THANK GOD HE WAS SAFE. and i still needed to buy my shirt. so michelle went to chiong buy her socks and i ran to the "pasar malam" to buy a shirt. after that we met up and went on the van, which drove us to a lake to sightsee. well, the view was quite nice, but the water was like... almost black. lol... the van drove us to another side of the lake, where there was a place where they reared fishes and we fed the fishes there. the fishes were quite crazy and huge, and kind of fought for the food. haha. after that we went back to ppj and hung around with the kids. some of us played soccer with the kids and students there, and i clearly remember minghui and alden owning in the soccer. as usual, i was goalkeeper. lol. the thai kids apparently were owning also and once again demonstrated excellent ball control. we were suppossed to have a party or something, and they bought those steamboat things for us to have steamboat dinner. well, honestly, they must have spent alot on that dinner. they apparently bought the steamboat things for us specially. and there was meat and beef and chicken and pork and all. well, i said grace for everyone. and i remember clearly that i prayed that the food will nourish us instead of making us fall ill ( more of us were falling ill ). apparently, after that dinner, i fell ill. and nick could not join us for dinner as he was sick. ( i doubt it was the dinner that made me ill. i prayed that it would not =P ) anyway i had diarrhoea and felt like vomitting. oh well. but after dinner i was just feeling nauseous. apparently i looked pale. but oh well. there was one last evangelistic act we had to do. a puppet show. however some of our puppeteers were too sick to do it, so alden and i had to take over. teresa also joined in, though she did not train with us for puppetry. so we left for this place which was also holding a christmas event thing. apparently it was also a christian thing. well, when i arrived i felt extremely nauseous, and began looking for a toilet. tim brought me there and i vomitted and felt alot better. i then drank some water. and went to do the puppets thing. apparently my puppet looked retarded. lol.. i felt kind of giddy la.. XD anyway they said teresa's puppet looked retarded. like crazy, as she didnt know how to control the puppet and all. and only saw our choreography and did not practice it. lol.. but i thought i was okay. well i didnt really see it, but apparently the audience ( the kids ... the older people were stoned as usual ) enjoyed it and was laughing and all. so i guess it was okay. after that we left and went back to ppj, where i bathed and went to sleep. well, i cant remember much clearly what happened that night, but apparently alot of us fell sick and i had a fever i think. i forgot who took care of me but i am extremely thankful to them nevertheless. apparently there were alot of people taking care of everyone and checking the sick and all. well anyway i woke up many times in the night to shit ( diarrhoea... couldnt control... almost shit my pants... ). like around 5-7 times i tink. but at least i felt alot better. i think at that time i didnt have a fever anymore. i felt alot better. but apparently i wasnt the only one with the same sickness. apparently tim had diarrhoea too. in my opinion, he probably got the sickness from me as i drank from his bottle and he drank from it. thus i think i spread it to him. oh well. that led me to think that gastric flu was the cause, as it was very contagious and all. and the symptoms are similar ( i think) to food poisoning. oh well. thank God that everyone has recovered.

Oh, and something happened that day that i find it hard to forget. After the first church service, and we were walking to the van, there was a boy who grabbed my hand and held it tightly and followed me to the van. okay apparently he dragged me and i followed. i was really suprised. i did not expect anything like this and their friendliness really warmed my heart. and the boy was really cute, from a erm... much older guy's perspective, not the other erm.. pedophilic kind. haha. okay. but this incident i find hard to forget, even though it was like only 5 minutes. Well, i tried talking to the boy, but apparently he couldnt understand me. I cant blame him, hes very young. like probably 4-6 years old. well, i blame myself for not properly learning the thai language. but i guess its too late to regret not learning it.

December 31, Day 6: I had a horrible night. Well, but i am thankful that i did not feel sick or feel feverish when i woke up the 5-7 times due to diarrhoea during the night. Well.. lets say that the whole bunk ran out of toilet paper after the night ended. and there was like more than a dozen rolls of toilet paper when we first went there. LOL. okay but apparently i did not have it that bad, that i had to bathe from the diarrhoea. ahem. okay. honestly i almost had to but i woke up and gained consciousness in time to run to the toilet. haha.. well i was thinking that IF a blackout were to occur that day, and there would be no water, i think that THAT would be super horrible. Thank God that that did not happen. cos if it did.... the toilet would be super smelly and dirty. and choked. ( our fourth toilet was choked so bad that the door was locked from the inside and cordoned off... apparently the repairman guy couldnt fix it i guess. )
Well, it was a sad day, i would say. Before i came, i had been thinking that many mission groups must have came before and went just like us. Now the mission groups might be different, but the children and residents in the hostel are still the same. I did not want to be like just another mission group that just came and went. I wanted to be one that made a lasting impact, such a lasting impact that they would remember us specifically and not like just another mission group that went there. Once again, i am unable to tell how much of an impact we made, so i really hope and pray that the impact was great. Well, i'm sure everyone was reluctant to leave. with all their farewell hugs and tears shed and photos taken, it all seemed to me like a way to treasure the moments with them just before we leave. well, if i remember correctly i shook and bid farewell to those i played soccer with. i did not interact much with the people there, honestly. i only did so in soccer and a very short "let me try to sculpt a balloon for this kid who wants me to sculpt a hat". well instead of a hat i gave him a dog. i think. and a sword. i had no idea how to make a hat. lol.. well, i was feeling only slightly nauseous. and i went to the bathroom due to diarrhoea just before we left just in case i needed to go on the way. so i went to "empty" first. well, 30 mins into the ride and i already had a stomach ache and felt slightly nauseous. i really needed the toilet, and beared with it for like an extremely long time until we reached the airport, where we waited (and i continued to bear) for the other van. when i could not take it anymore, i went into the airport (i didnt want to go in as i had to scan and pass through the security check), scanned and ran to the toilet. thank God that the Thai customs people understood what toilet is. i couldnt imagine myself finding the toilet. anyway i relieved myself and went back out to wait, and tried to sleep to catch up on lost sleep during the night, and due to my nauseousness. well then the van came, and we checked in our luggage, then i went to the toilet again. this time, i really couldnt take it as i felt extremely nauseous and tried to puke. apparently i couldnt, but for some wierd reason i came out feeling alot better. oh well. i went to diarrhoea instead. then we sat around and slacked and i went to sleep. when it was time, we checked in ourselves and went to the waiting area and i went to the toilet again. and we boarded the plane to bangkok and i went to the toilet during the flight. the toilet was stuck. seriously. but not cos of me. lol. ( actually i cant really remember which flight i went to the toilet in. ) well, when we reached bangkok airport and went back to the same lounge area, i ordered mushroom soup, along with tim. and apparently nick also ordered later. well, it was really good. i was not confident in eating something solid and i wanted something hot. so what better than hot soup? :P well i guess it really helped, as after that i can only remember going toilet twice during the 2-3 hour wait for the next flight. oh and though the soup was rather expensive, even by our country's standards, ( i tink its like S$7 for the soup) the soup was alot and there was bread! so i was satisfied and didnt complain. and the soup tasted good, and tasted like it was freshly made and not from a can or something. well no complaining there. well, we waited there until check in time, where we joked about how this place would be extremely familiar for some of us. ahem. and we kind of slacked and played cards and ate snacks and all. at check in time everything more or less went smoothly until YY tried to check in at the boarding area. she lost her boarding pass. this happened when we were waiting on the bus that would bring us to the plane, and we were already late for our flight. so those on the bus immediately checked if we took her pass by mistake. there was like 7 of us on the bus already. then one of us found it and marcus took it and ran to pass it to YY. well, he took it and ran immediately to the customs thing and we began to once again, pray. well we really prayed alot during the trip and i guess the most eventful times was definately at that airport. lol... apparently that place likes to play with us =) haha.. just kidding... anyway everyone was on except for deborah and yunying. that was when i had this wierd feeling that they would come and i would not need to worry. well okay being human i still did abit... but then i saw deborah running down the stairs ( we were late for our flight already ). there was only deborah running down the stairs, so i felt like my heart fell due to worrying. then i saw yy running down the stairs and heaved a sigh of relief. at least that was another problem solved, and there would be no more hassle and worries. ( except that the plane would crash perhaps) well, okay.. yy being yy, she was super excited and hyper and relieved at the same time, and her face was super red. really red. okay it was purple. anyway we had a smooth flight back to Singapore and had a great time sitting next to alden and talking to him.. haha... we touched down and we had this big "welcoming committee" for us outside the luggage area. it was quite nice to see so many people waiting for us outside, and it was a really good feeling. well, i followed teresa's parents and they sent me to church as my parents were in church for the watchnight service. apparently it already started and i was super late. okay.. but walking in, i saw chuiling at the pantry. i was shocked to see her sitting there and went to talk to her. i tot no one from the mission trip was going for the watchnight service, but apparently her being there would mean yy would be there too. yay.. at least someone in our cell group around. then i saw sam leong ( the same cell one) and apparently alot of the girls who went for the mission trip appeared and went for watchnight service. well i stood at the back and was just in time for the countdown thingy. after the countdown the usual greetings and all and wishings for each other took place and jowell joined the group ( i was the only guy before that XD ). we hung around and went to level 3 for supper. i didnt eat it ( i currently still cant believe i had no appetite to eat. that no appetite feeling until i really dont want to eat is something i am not used to. really. ) well i hung around and talked to people and listened to the others tell stories abt the mission trip. then i went home with my parents and went to bathe, to the toilet, prayed for those still in Thailand ( Minghui was still there to continue missions with some others ) went to sleep. oh and i started blogging this on that day i returned. and it took me until now, 18th january, 12.30am in the morning to finish it. great.

i guess i really love this mission trip. sadly, i feel that ive already lost my spiritual high... i guess i have to try to bring it back up. well, it certainly has been an eventful mission trip. and i miss the bonding times that our group has went through. it is, until now, still an obvious improvement in our groups' bonds, even those that did not go for the trip. somehow, for some reason, everyone looks and feels more united as O.C.E.A.N. and closer to God than ever before, or i could be a deranged crazy person. okay i am but i am quite sure i am not imagining this. well, i pray that it will continue on through the years, as more things begin to spring up, that we will remain as united, maybe even more united, and even closer in our walk with God.

Like all my essays, i number the number of words used, and excluding this paragraph, the total number of words is 8705. but i feel alot more can be said and i mentioned only a few key things that happened during the trip. words can only tell you so much. somethings need to be experienced.

2007-10-28T05:23:00.000-07:00

i wrote a song a long time ago. lol.. found it while going through the texts i have done before.. well..its more than a song than a poem and i have no idea how to write music scores so i guess i'll just leave it as lyrics. haha... go figure out you own tune and just go imagine it...

My King

Jesus, oh Jesus
Wondrous beyond compare
Savior, from Heaven
To Earth, He came, our sins to bear

King, of all majesty,
Yet on the cross he was disgraced
Tortured, mocked and murdered
By the ones that He had came to save

Oh won't you sing
For my King
With the Sacrifice of Praise
Endured all suffering as He thought of me
One of the many He came to save

2007-09-28T04:46:00.000-07:00

haha... once again i havent blogged for so long.. oh well...

okay my prelim results are out... quite some time le but i just havent had the time to blog it.
my results are horrible! dont expect a high mark or smth, or dont even think i am being modest.

its horrible.

Lets see... my
English B4 (deproved by 1 grade)
Mathematics B4 (improved by 1 grade, but below expectations
Combined science B3 (no change, but i was hoping for A1)
Chinese E8 (horrible, as usual)
Biology A1 (improved by 1 grade, but just barely A1)

Sounds okay so far? (besides chinese)

okay, heres what shocked me

Social Studies/History E8 (ARGH!!! WHY!!! NOOOO!!!! but moderated to D7. like that helped.)

Geography D7
(ARGHH!!! AGAIN!!! I REALLY THOUGHT THAT I COULD AT LEAST PASS THIS TIME!!!from A1 in sec 1 and 2 to D7 in sec 3 and 4)

Argh. even with my better subjects, i had to count 2 of the 3 subjects i failed. thus, my L1R5 was 26. didnt improve since mid years... haiz... well.. my L1R2B2 is 19.. i tink that can get me into electronic engineering... but i really wanna enter ACJC.

heres why- i've been in ACJC for like.. as long as i can remember. NO i didnt retain there since i could remember, but the church i attend, Faith Methodist Church, has services over at ACJC long ago as the main building at Commonwealth was not big enough to accomodate everyone. well, im quite familiar with the whole place even though it has renovated and changed alot. Previously i thought that the renovation and enlarging of the church building means that i didnt have to go to ACJC for services anymore... BUT SUPRISE!!! now i go there for cell group lessons every sundays after TTB service. haha... so i still go ACJC every week :P I really want to enter ACJC as it holds many memories for me. its like this place youve always been frequently visiting since toddler days...

Oh well.. i guess i cant go for like the 1st month orientation for any JC with 26 points... but with regards to my future aspirations, i'd like to study psychology in university.. and get a masters degree to be able to practice it... i guess i'll just have to work harder for it during the O's and pray hard that God wants me doing that...

Its...
All done in His Perfect timing,
All part of His master plan for me,
All things the best for me,
All things done for His Glory,

All things Glorifying Him,
All things made possible by Him,

All things to make me closer to Him